Severe sciatic pain is here again

K

Kaylyn52

Newcomer
Hello, I'm new!
I developed sciatic pain on my left side last June. I had physical therapy in the fall, and seemed to get a lot better.

Starting in December, I started to have tingling in that leg, and it really worried me. The tingling and pain has been increasing, and my doctor prescribed an x-ray and more PT.

I got the x-ray results on Friday, and there is an area of the hip that they want to take a look at with a CT scan to rule out a abnormality. Over the weekend, my pain has become so severe I can hardly do anything.

I am familiar with Dr. Sarno and Dr. Schubiner's books, and I realize that my worry is most likely increasing my pain. But I currently feel stuck. I have to get the CT scan to rule out anything. I desperately want to fully believe that my mind is causing this pain. I am open to the idea that it's TMS, and that therapy had a placebo effect.

My mom died almost 2 years ago and had severe back problems, and all the meds she was on masked her heart attacks. It was very traumatic. I have been so fearful that I would inherit her issues. And now this sciatica is making me think I have.

I really want to just dig in and figure out if it's truly TMS but I guess I have to rule out a structural issue. I feel like going crazy being in limbo.

Any advice or ideas?
 
Rage is the main issue.
Rage against bad situations and experiences....but especially rage against people.
Rage aganist people... but especially rage against much beloved people.
Rage against much beloved people... but especially guilt for that rage.
....coupled with fear and anxiety.
That emotional cocktail is unbearable, menacing and unnaceptable for our psychological integrity ..... and the brain is ready to protect us via the eficient «distraction» provided, far from our will, by the pain. Nothing to do with structural/anatomic «imperfections».

Hope that helps!
 
Hi Kaylyn,

Of all the myriad of TMS symptoms that I've had, I have to say that sciatica was the most painful and scary for me. The first time it struck, I didn't know about TMS. The doctor prescribed oral steroids and it went away within a few days. However, the next year it came back with a vengeance. By this time, I knew about TMS and was already working the SEP. I've related the story below before on this Wiki, but it's worth mentioning again.

In December 2016, my brother was grievously ill and was not expected to live. He lived 1000 miles away from me. Since I was in too much pain to fly, we decided to drive to see him in the hospital. My husband made a bed for me in the back seat. As soon as I got into the car, the sciatica started. Suddenly, I felt rage boiling up inside of me. I was furious .....at the pain, that my brother was dying, and that I was so damn broken. Inside of my head I screamed for the sciatica to "beat it!!!" I may have cursed, I don't remember. But within a few seconds it went away and never came back.

Because I've been so hard on myself throughout my life, I don't normally treat my TMS symptoms this way. I prefer to take a kinder and more gentle approach. However, I think there are times when we are fed up enough that we have to let our brains know who's the boss.

Also, I can relate to your story about your mother. My mother had severe pain the last 10 years of her life. It was horrifying. I too, have been worried that she passed a genetic defect to me. Finding out about TMS, and joining this community of support, has helped to alleviate most of those fears because I now realize my mom had severe TMS. Not some disease that I am doomed to inherit.
 
I definitely understand the concept of fear and anxiety and rage, and TMS symptoms, I guess I just feel stuck right now while I'm waiting to rule out any problems. I know you're supposed to rule out a tissue problem first before following any of these programs.
 
HattieNC said:
Also, I can relate to your story about your mother. My mother had severe pain the last 10 years of her life. It was horrifying.

I'm so sorry your mother suffered, Hattie. It is indeed horrifying to see that.

And I agree, sciatica is awful. It's the worst physical pain I've ever felt. Thank you for sharing your story.
Click to expand...
 
Hi Kaylin52,
I just posted with the same thing going on. Understanding TMS allowed me to make my back happy now TMS is attacking my LT butt and down my leg. I think we need to figure out how to have a contentious to unconscious conversation with ourselves. Find out where the conflict is and take steps to resolve it. There was a door that we all went through to get in here there is a door that we can go out to resolve our issue. Looking for the door.
 
Hi Kaylin52
I wrote a post last year (I think) regarding my sciatica pain, coupled with back issues (diagnosed) and hip issues (diagnosed). You can probably find it on my posts. In any event, I followed Sarno's and other's advice on treating this as TMS. I journaled for many months, once or twice per day. I did not keep these journals but tore them up, thus freeing me from not writing things that were not necessarily kind or forgiving. No one needed to find/see these journals. My life had been through many traumas in the year(s) prior, including the death of my brother, other family divisions and splits, the retirement from my career along with the conundrum of aging. I could barely walk, had pain always, sitting, laying flat, etc. After about four or five months of intensive journaling I woke up one morning and the sciatica was gone! I continued journaling and eventually most of the other symptoms diminished and eventually went away.
So, do not give up. Even if your doctors 'discover' that you have a 'real' problem, this does not mean that the pain is not TMS. Read some of the books suggested by many here on this forum, work through Alan Gordon's program.
Pain is discouraging, yes, but many here have prevailed and eliminated much, if not all of their pain, even with 'diagnosed' physical issues.
Kindly
Lainey
 
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