Severe Hip issue (with MRI done)

Hey al - so starting about a year or two ago I started noticing increasingly painful hip pain and tightness in the hip flexor and even shooting down the IT bands. It began to get worse and tighter to the point where I couldnt ignore it any longer and got an MRI a couple months ago.

The results were terrifying. At 44 years old they told me I had severe arthritis (degeneration of cartilage) as well as bursitis on both sides. Obviously they brought up surgery or even hip replacement which is insane for a 44 year old. Im scared to be honest.

I ended up having a cortisone shot because the pain was so bad I couldnt even sleep and that did help a lot (took my pain from a 9 to a 5). I am actively stretching every morning for 6 months and lying off high impact exercise which they told me to do. The pain hasnt gotten worse but not better either. When I squat or bend my legs I immediately get a sharp inching pain.

Couple things I will mention:

1. I have struggled with TMS for 20+ years, mostly in my lower back after I herniated a couple discs, but also have had chest and arm pain.

2. I wouldnt say I'm under more stress than normal, in fact I have had some wonderful things go my way recently career wise, but I still do have a lot of overall stress (going through the financial aspect of a divorce for one), but also just the fear of not being able to run, exercise, jump, have sex, is causing me even more worry.

3. Since I got divorced 5 years ago I have had a LOT of sex. I went from no sex while married to having sex 3-5 times a night, 3-4 times a week, for 5 straight years. So it could certainly be argued that I have really fucked (literally) my hips up.

I dont know what to do here I am really scared right now. The MRI shows concerning things, but what's a bit strange is that the pain started getting much worse after me and my last GF broke up (very mature and stress-free breakup, not something that caused me mental anguish). So I just dont understand what is going on but now the doc is talking about PRP, stem cell injections, hip replacement. Im freaked out.

Anyone have similar experience?

 

I can't say I've had hip pain at that level, but that's probably because I'm pretty good at halting the pain from getting worse. I'm somewhat of a TMS veteran... healed from some pretty bad things over the years. About 2 yrs ago, I started feeling some hip pain that was getting worse slowly over time. I didn't fret over it, applied some tried and true things that work for me and today hardly even notice anything at all. I'm 54 yrs old and am very active.

Fear is not your friend.... my quick two cents for you is to work on developing feelings of safety even in the midst of the pain. Somatic tracking works for me. So does imaging (i.e. imagining myself well and pain free) and meditation (i.e. relaxation response).

PS. I doubt that too much sex is your problem... at least the problem of hip pain

 

Friend I feel you. When I was 24 a doctor told me in no uncertain terms I was going to have arthritis in the hip in injured in a dance class and I remember being outraged. When we're afraid the fastest way to get relief is to focus on a smooth even breath in and out through your nose. Your comments about your sexuality sound as if you are punishing yourself. I'm a yogini and a dancer, and I understand how scary hip pain can be. You did such a good thing in reaching our for support.

Remember, your hips can be all kinds of screwed up and never cause you pain. Even if your current divorce isn't stressing you, it could trigger emotions from other relationships. There are many emotions that we experience as unpleasant and all of them need to be processed. I recommend you go to the PPDA website or Youtube and watch the video about Jessica who was a dancer and had serious hip issues. Start there and pl

 

I stand with you sdidy. I havent been to this site in 9 years and I’m back due to “chronic hip flexor tendonitis”. I never thought it could be TMS for reasons I wont get into here, but like you I have dealt with TMS for decades, including some I didn’t know about TMS and just suffered with one thing after another.

One of my closest friends said a few weeks ago “Have you done your Mind Body work? Just saying. ”. I rejected it at first. But then I started going through the history of it which goes back 3 years now, early in the Covid era (mmm?.) I started reading the original TMS bible “Healing Back Pain” and there were all the words again, about my personality (yes to all), about the diagnosis (a mild bursitis, mild this, chronic that, no major structural issues, the treatments (yes to all) and it struck me. I’m a healthy 55 year old, who works out and has a regular meditation practice. I have also been been trying to get in touch with deep anger about my family life I know is there.

Our minds are capable of not only repressing difficult/scary emotions and then repressing them with TMS. They are capable of creating powerful stories about how well we are handling, or not experiencing those emotions at all. I’m starting so see how those stories could be a first line of defense that keep me from experiencing those emotions which would then unlock the TMS.

All the Mind Body MDs, including Dr. Sarno, said first make sure you don't have a real physical problem that would be the cause of your pain. You’ve got a diagnosis from an MD who I assume doesn’t know about or believe in the power of TMS. Could you share your images with an MD who does? That was key to me fully recovering from my back pain.

I’m not saying you do or dont have TMS but is it possible you aren’t quite as sanguine about the divorce and break up as you think you are? TMS recovery requires us to be strong in two ways: dealing with the physical pain and accepting that we all have emotions that we are conditioned to think are bad, wrong, make us weak, etc. when what those emotions really make us is human.

PS. I used to use sex to hide from difficult emotions. Not saying you do or should stop by any means, but it definitely can be used as a coping mechanism for all kind of stuff.