Day 1 Seeing patterns

I'm brand new to TMS. I'm 9 months beyond a series of epidural injections for two herniated discs. Was getting better but the pain never went away totally. Then a week ago I fell off the mountain and I'm back to crippling sciatica.

This morning I started noting each individual area of worry, sadness and anger that I was feeling in the days leading up to the flare up and it's filling a small notebook. I also started thinking about when my problems started and I can trace it the milder symptoms back to my late 20s (I'm in my 50s) and the turning point (when I went from symptoms that were irritating, like numbness and tingling, to symptoms that changed me from an active runner to someone who now has trouble walking for than 50 feet) to a single event: the sudden death of my father a few years ago.

I have been in therapy, lots of it. I was in psychoanalysis for 15 years and ultimately rejected it because it didn't alleviate my symptoms, which were panic, GAD, social anxiety and major depression. The inadequacy and impracticality of Freud's version of the talking cure is why I have difficulty with some of Sarno's assertions, but I can work around those things. I ended up tackling my issues with Schema therapy and CBT. I'm better now except for the GAD.

But in the intervening years since my father died, as my mental health has gotten remarkably better and my functioning in relationships and work has improved, my physical health has declined in direct proportion. I am still entangled in conflicts both with some members of my family and with my own mind in terms of guilt, regret, hyper responsibility, resentment and perfectionism, to name a few. It is not a great stretch to consider that these unresolved issues, combined with my fundamental personality, has simply been rechanneled through my body.

I saw my pain management person last week, who was nonalarmist and left what I want to do next up to me. More shots if I want them, or PT, or wait it out. Also saw an acupuncture and trigger point therapist, which did nothing to help.

I am willing to give this program a shot.

 

Hi. You have finally found the right place to heal your pain. Have you read Dr. John Sarno's book, Healing Back Pain ? He explains his TMS concept. You can find free videos about it on YouTube. He suggests that a person with TMS study his 12 Daily Reminders. Here is a good version of them:

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   Herbie’s Extended Version of Dr. Sarno’s 12 DAILY REMINDERS
   1. The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but it is caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears, and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does cause real pain too.
   2. The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you get in pain or in anxiety then the blood is restricted from going to a place such as the lower back. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain. Remember, where there is no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, the pain stays because of fear and focus to physical organic symptoms and repressions.

1. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS, so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from TMS healing knowledge causing damage to anyone. TMS knowledge only helps.

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1. The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER. This means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. TMSers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits,traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks it is helping you.

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1. TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you won't have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed because you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.

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1. Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear then I feed the pain. If I fear It is impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.

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1. Therefore, physical activity is harmless. If I want to work against the pain, I could, but it is better to lose some of the pain.

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1. I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my body's ability to heal now. I can move how I want. I will not fear moving with a bent back anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.

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1. The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how it is hidden -- it's illusion; it's fear.

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10. I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face everyone of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present, in flow.

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   11. I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.

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12. I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling. The science behind mind- body/TMS healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of TMS. TMS will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off psychical symptoms and on emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore, ` thus making the tms of no effect. This will in return, give you the cure.

 

Thanks for this extended list of definitions, Walt. I found the original ones a little sparse. Yes, I read "Healing Back Pain" over the weekend and now I'm reading "The Great Pain Deception". I'm on Day 3 of the program and have already started making changes to try to help myself. I took my full lunch hour for the first time ever, perhaps. I used the time to go for a walk, which I've never done. It was painful, and I had to stop a lot, but I needed to do it so I'm not so afraid of walking, and so I can see proof that "triggering" the pain doesn't mean it will linger. I'll do it again tomorrow. I also stopped people from scheduling meetings after the workday is over, and I'm going to stop checking and responding to emails outside of business hours.

When I was out today I was setting goals for, say, walking a certain number of minutes without stopping, but the pain was so bad that I had to stop anyway. I was beating myself up over this.

One thing I'm having trouble with is understanding if I should be doing anything to treat my current acute pain so I can get it back down to a manageable level. I have been using a hot water bottle in the evenings, but am no longer taking painkillers or NSAIDs, or applying ice packs.

Any advice is welcome. Thanks again.

 

Walking is one of the best things you can do to heal. A hot water bottle or heating pad is okay. Glad you're not taking pain killers or NSAIDS anymore. 100 percent belief in TMS is essential.

 

Ah, good. Also, I'm sorry I called you "Herbie." I have no idea why. It's been a long day.

 

No problem. Herbie is a nice guy and a friend of mine.