Schubiner’s Five F’s

Dr. Schubiner has 5 F’s he suggests not to get caught up in
Fixing
Fear
Frustration
Fighting
Focus

I f’ind all of these a challenge, but fear and frustration are so tied to emotion that I find this list can have me trying to deny them.
Remembering that feeling the emotion of being frustrated is ok (anger) but not staying in that headspace is hard.
Similarly fear. Fear is my looming difficulty. I work with it daily but find it’s a hard one because I feel I fight it by not giving into it. Feeling it would be a 24 hr event in my head! What it really boils down to is overthinking in dealing with these things. Another personal challenge. Confronting these F’s while not letting them rule, not overthinking them or this list and at the same time acknowledging I do them all. trying to find that balance of leaning into feeling the emotions surrounding them while not getting caught up in their cycle.
Most of these are part of the SEP and we are asked to journal on them (I have at length).


How do you feel you deal with these F’s? Have you considered them? Are they a struggle for you?

 

One of my go toes for getting my brain to stop ruminating on something is to sing. Our brains can't process two sets of language based activities at once. Singing takes the resources away from the problem thoughts. For this to work best you need to sing out loud. Singing the words is more interesting to your brain than the thoughts it's stuck on. Try it, it doesn't matter whether you a good singer or not, this works and it's fun.

 

Bumping this up because the 5Fs were mentioned today by @Cactusflower in another thread.

I haven’t dug deep enough into Schubiner’s book yet to run across his 5 Fs. But seeing them listed here, I can admit that all of them are a problem for me. But, the fear has subsided the most, thanks to thinking about all the other times I’ve had TMS and most of them went away by ignoring it. This episode I have right now is very weird. Truly. Weird symptoms. At first it tried to scare me with it. But now, I’ve had the smallest amount of success because on some days the pain and/or symptoms subside.

The past couple days, I had somewhat of an old nightmare show up out of the blue. A very old issue appeared having to do with an unpleasant ex-husband. Needless to say, I did not like these memories at all! My symptoms were through the roof when I woke up this morning. I said to my TMS brain. “Of course! You’re angry and upset! Take your time. Go ahead and act it out. Rage it out. I hear you!” It’s still bad today. But I’m at peace. This will pass. As will this heinous issue.

At any rate: I think my biggest tool is turning out to be ACCEPTANCE. For the most part, I am accepting where my life has taken me with TMS. I’m observing the changes in myself. I’m learning a TON from journaling. I’m realizing that some of my 5Fs have to do with worrying how other people feel, which is a stronger feeling than the TMS feeling. Now that’s saying something!

There’s No end to the learning on this journey. I’m utterly amazed. And for today anyway, I’m at peace with my symptoms. I’m somewhat disabled. Can’t walk fast…can’t do much with my body. But my spirit and mind are growing by leaps and bounds every day! There’s more to us than meets the eye. Maybe that’s the point. I’m not trying to fix anymore. Just waiting this out.

 

There's a 6th: Figuring out....the brain reads that as "there's a huge problem he/she is trying to solve", therefore DANGER.The less time spent in the Fs, the faster you will make progress. Not F'ing goes an extremely long way!

 

The F's all seem to relate to being too much in our head. Overthinking.

I've used the singing strategy outlined above. I wrote my own silly song that starts out "My only problem is I think I have a problem." (This line is from A Course in Miracles.)

I also recite the Buddhist Love and Kindness Meditation to move my thoughts that are stuck on something:

May you be filled with love and kindness.
May you be safe and protected.
May you love and be loved.
May you be happy and contented.
May your life unfold with ease.
May you be healthy and strong.

Any set of words that you find comforting would do.

 

Love this!!!

 

This is beautiful. Thank you!

 

Dr. Schubiner says the five Fs are things “not to get caught up in.” That is the negative side--what to avoid. How about the positive side--what is needed to recover from TMS (aka PPD)? Schubiner has addressed that in an observation that I think is brilliant for its succinctness.

Speaking as a clinician who treats PPD, Schubiner said a patient needs four things to succeed: (1) an explanation of what is wrong, (2) a technique to use to fix the problem, (3) a clinician he or she trusts, and ( 4) hope and optimism. It is of course the trusted clinician who provides the explanation of what is wrong and the technique(s) to fix it. It is also the trusted clinician who engenders hope and optimism in the patient. Schubiner and coauthor Dr. Allan Abbass wrote in their book Hidden from View: A Clinician’s Guide to Psychophysiologic Disorders: “As a foundation for this clinical work, creating trust with your patient is always key. . . . such a therapeutic relationship with your patient is a necessary ingredient for success at each step.” If a patient trusts that the clinician knows his or her business, then the patient will trust that the clinician’s explanation for what is wrong is correct, will trust that the technique the clinician prescribes to fix the problem will work, and will trust the clinician's implicit, if not expressed, view that the patient will be able to implement the technique.

I think that the same things, i.e., (1), (2), and (4) above but sans (3), are necessary when a person is seeking to recover from TMS on a self-help basis. You need to find an explanation for what is wrong that you trust is correct and a technique to fix it that you trust will work, and you need hope and optimism about being able to successfully implement the technique. If you have those three things, they will go a long way toward avoiding the five Fs.

If you don’t have those three things, good luck. I believe Schubiner is right about the need for (1), (2), and (4).

 

Thank you, @Duggit! Great hope and great information to have!