Alouqua47
Peer Supporter
I think I need support from my Cweeky community, even though only a few people show up there now. This month has been very difficult. It feels like all my attempts to improve only make things worse. The pain has been very intense and widespread, especially in my left arm. The other symptoms take a back seat, honestly—they’re uncomfortable, but they’re not permanent and don’t cause as much pain. It literally feels like nerve pain inside, especially in my elbow, running down my arm and into my fingers. I’m exhausted and always wonder if I’m doing it right. Sometimes I remind myself that what matters is the overall trend. Maybe that’s it. If I’m doing well most of the time and don’t interpret my pain as threatening, my brain will understand this pattern, this connection will weaken, and it will start to let go.
Then I think I need to relax my nervous system overall, and I just wonder how I’m supposed to do that when it’s screaming in my ear. I try to stay calm and respond well to my symptoms in general, but it’s a moment-to-moment struggle. There have only been a few days when the pain was a little lighter, but the rest of the time… I wish there were people around who have overcome things like this. I don’t think there are anymore—they don’t visit the forum, I don’t know. Sometimes I wonder if the intensity of the pain has a big influence on whether people improve, or if it’s still possible, but you just need trust and, in some way, try to endure, try to relax despite the pain.
I try to do what I can at home, but I feel pressured by the ideas of not being able to do what I want, since it’s in my arms. And I tell myself, no, I’ll do what I can. I don’t want to pressure myself. Honestly, you never truly live calmly—it's just that when you have two kids, it’s hard not to want to get involved or do something for them. On the few good days I’ve had, I’ve been able to do more things; the other days disappoint me a little, and honestly, I suffer a lot. I’ve made a lot of progress emotionally. I went from doing almost nothing to doing everything, but I always have to give myself a little push to get started, especially on days when the pain is worse. Sometimes I simply don’t feel like doing it—not out of fear of making things worse, but just because I’m suffering.
I want to know if any of you have experienced strong, stabbing, continuous pain and, despite that, improved, endured, tried to dispel doubts, tried not to fall into negative thoughts, and avoided getting emotionally involved with the symptom—trying in some way to feel it without fear, but at the same time not letting it take over.
Then I think I need to relax my nervous system overall, and I just wonder how I’m supposed to do that when it’s screaming in my ear. I try to stay calm and respond well to my symptoms in general, but it’s a moment-to-moment struggle. There have only been a few days when the pain was a little lighter, but the rest of the time… I wish there were people around who have overcome things like this. I don’t think there are anymore—they don’t visit the forum, I don’t know. Sometimes I wonder if the intensity of the pain has a big influence on whether people improve, or if it’s still possible, but you just need trust and, in some way, try to endure, try to relax despite the pain.
I try to do what I can at home, but I feel pressured by the ideas of not being able to do what I want, since it’s in my arms. And I tell myself, no, I’ll do what I can. I don’t want to pressure myself. Honestly, you never truly live calmly—it's just that when you have two kids, it’s hard not to want to get involved or do something for them. On the few good days I’ve had, I’ve been able to do more things; the other days disappoint me a little, and honestly, I suffer a lot. I’ve made a lot of progress emotionally. I went from doing almost nothing to doing everything, but I always have to give myself a little push to get started, especially on days when the pain is worse. Sometimes I simply don’t feel like doing it—not out of fear of making things worse, but just because I’m suffering.
I want to know if any of you have experienced strong, stabbing, continuous pain and, despite that, improved, endured, tried to dispel doubts, tried not to fall into negative thoughts, and avoided getting emotionally involved with the symptom—trying in some way to feel it without fear, but at the same time not letting it take over.