Hi everyone, I want to share with you an experience I had today. I have chronic pain for about 5 years. Discovered TMS 2 years ago, still in pain, but with a lot of hope. I had ups and downs and TMS makes more sense to me now. 3 days agoI began improving a lot by stop monitoring the symptoms I made in my head. I did very well until something happened to me today. I had an angry outburts in the street with somebody, like I never had before. It was a person pretending he was deaf-mute and asking people for donations in the street. I gave this same person 50 cents like 3 months ago and he got angry at me because I gave him too little money. I say nothing to him and went home, however I was very upset because he didn't deserve it, especially after he got angry at me and I said nothing to him (repressed). Today I was feeling a lot better, my TMS symptoms improved a lot in just 3 days, I felt strong, however, this guy approached me again in the street asking for money. I said no, he insisted behind me, I said loud to him, NO ! I was angry, I walked my way toward library, I stopped in front of it to wait for a friend. This guy, again, came to me, this time speaking, he was angry and intimadating, however I got much more angry at him, I had an outburst of anger, he began shouting and I began shouthing at him like crazy to walk away from me, about the 50 cents I gave him few months ago and to not ask me for money again. The flight or fight reaction I had was pretty strong, I began shaking. He got submissive, then he walked away. After that, the flight or fight and tms symptoms were very strong and it got better after about 30 minutes. The thing is, I never showed anger, never in the street, always repressing, this time I couldn't control myself, it was crazy. I felt bad about my reaction and I am still angry about this a little bit now. I realise now that I want so bad to focus at my symptoms again right now, and that, when my symptoms are better I feel much more happiness, when I keep focusing on the symptoms, I am angry all the time at almost everything, but I never show anger, but when I feel very tense, with pain, I am very angry inside even if I try to not appear angry. After this anger outburst I needed much more my symptoms as I continued to be angry and I felt ashamed about that happening in the street. However I try my best not to focus on the symptoms as I am aware that will get worse if I do and if I stop obssesing about them I will be happier and less angry. I think this correlates with TMS, when somebody is repressing, keep things inside, they may have an outburst of anger from little things, however, a happier person, in touch with their feelings, they may react with much more control, with a lower fight or flight response and less tensed.