Question: (how much) To feel or not to feel?

N

Nina

New Member
Day 8
I am noticing that I have a polar relationship with feelings. I realize that I have distracted myself from feeling, usually with overwork. But now that I am feeling my emotions, my question is how do I know I have felt them enough before I let them go? I acknowledge them, breathe into them, feel them in my body… But then I kind of get trapped in the loop and have a hard time knowing when it is OK to let them go.
Any suggestions?
 
Reading your post I get the impression that you hold on to feelings because you're afraid you might suppress them if you let go to soon. Is this what it is like for you?

If it is: I don't think you need to hold on to feelings. I think you're doing great by acknowledging them, being with them and so on. I like the RAIN method that Tara Brach uses in her meditations to investigate emotions. Maybe that can be of help to you.

I don't think you need to hold on. Just be there and let them flow. It is ok if they go away. Maybe you can image them as the ebb and flow of the sea. It's no use trying to prevent the flow or to hold on to the water when ebb starts, is it?
 
You have read my dilemma perfectly Bur. Thank you!
I realize that I am already doing a variation of the RAIN method, but in typical TMS style I was struggling with whether I was doing it “perfectly.” :)
Thank you for validating that I am on the right track and that I can trust that feeling deeply and letting go is enough.
 
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