Day 6 Progress and setbacks

Day 2 was the best day of 2017 for me. Committing to do this program and really believing the diagnoses led to my first night of the year with virtually no pain. I woke up around 4 am, like usual, but this time I had no pain and I got back to sleep after a bit. It was the first really solid experience to add to my evidence sheet, and I'm so grateful. Feels like there's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Since that night, I've gone back to having the pain. It's not greater than it was, but it's definitely more annoying, now that I'm convinced I can make it go away. What's most annoying is that I feel it most intensely around 3-4am when I wake up each night. It's often bad enough that I can't fall back to sleep. If I do get any more sleep it tends to be extremely light. Days/weeks/months of this, with no break, has left me utterly worn down. Also I'm a new dad (3 month old), so it's not like sleep is easy even without the TMS right now.

I'm at the point where I really don't look forward to going to sleep anymore. I know I need to change that attitude somehow, but I'm at a loss. I'm looking for practical advice on what I could do with myself in the middle of the night that will help me get back to sleep (or at least not be so frustrated). I've tried journaling, reading, deep breathing / meditation. Nothing is making much of a difference.

If anybody has overcome this type of situation I'd appreciate hearing what worked for you, or if it just got better by staying the course.

Thanks y'all!

 

Hi Dewey -

This is the point at which it's important to realize that your brain is fighting back! Hard! Your primitive brain has one job, and that's to ensure your survival. It believes that if you are not on the alert for danger at all times, that you will die. TMS is the stupid and primitive mechanism by which it thinks to accomplish this, but in today's world, it just isn't necessary, and doesn't work at all well given how long we now live.

One of the awesome resources I found which really taught me this is a program called Meditations to Change Your Brain, by Dr. Richard Mendius, MD and Rick Hanson, PhD. It's mostly lectures, with some helpful meditations. Available everywhere: Sounds True, Amazon, Audible, and perhaps your local library.

 

That explains a lot to me because I am making progress but have setbacks

 

Thanks for the idea, I'll definitely check out that book.

 

I like this book a lot. Thanks for the advice Jan! I never connected with meditation in the past because I've just found it too hard and frustrating. But having the scientific explanations woven throughout is really helpful and resonates with me.