Derek S. Procrastination/TMS

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mulwoodscribe

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Question
One of my personalty traits that I am addressing in the TMS Educational Program is procrastination. I have always been a procrastinator and this trait has prevented me from being as successful as I believe I can be. I have journaled about procrastination and have speculated that the source of procrastination could be a response to overly high expectations that my parents had of me. It could also be a fear of failure. Or a fear of success. My question is: Does procrastination have any relationship to TMS and if it does, how can I overcome this trait? Thank you.
 
Answer
Thanks for your question, mulwoodscribe. Ironically I didn't answer this until the very last minute.

In your question you mention the high expectations of your parents and fear of failure and/or success as possible sources of procrastination. I would suggest that the expectations of your parents have been internalized. Your parents don’t have to pressure you anymore because your mind is doing it for them.

Procrastination is the mind’s response to feeling an immense amount of pressure. It is essentially the mind saying “Stop putting so much pressure on me!”

How does this relate to TMS? That's an interesting question.

Perhaps procrastination is the mind’s way of rebelling against pressure, while TMS is the body's way of doing the same.

Perhaps procrastination is an indirect outlet for the rage that you're repressing in response to the constant pressure you're putting on yourself.

Perhaps procrastination is an unconscious way to bring yourself to a state of fight or flight, which is home for some people.

Understanding this relationship though is pretty academic. The real question is, "What the hell do I do about it?!"

Overcoming procrastination is a process of reconditioning your behavior and facing your feelings head on. When the urge to procrastinate comes up, use this as an opportunity to explore whether you're putting pressure on yourself, what that feels like in your body, and what emotions you may be experiencing.

Like any kind of change, it will take time and practice. Be patient with yourself, you will get there with tenacity and relentless self-compassion.

Best of luck in your recovery!

Derek

Any advice or information provided here does not and is not intended to be and should not be taken to constitute specific professional or psychological advice given to any group or individual. This general advice is provided with the guidance that any person who believes that they may be suffering from any medical, psychological, or mindbody condition should seek professional advice from a qualified, registered/licensed physician and/or psychotherapist who has the opportunity to meet with the patient, take a history, possibly examine the patient, review medical and/or mental health records, and provide specific advice and/or treatment based on their experience diagnosing and treating that condition or range of conditions. No general advice provided here should be taken to replace or in any way contradict advice provided by a qualified, registered/licensed physician and/or psychotherapist who has the opportunity to meet with the patient, take a history, possibly examine the patient, review medical and/or mental health records, and provide specific advice and/or treatment based on their experience diagnosing and treating that condition or range of conditions.

The general advice and information provided in this format is for informational purposes only and cannot serve as a way to screen for, identify, or diagnose depression, anxiety, or other psychological conditions. If you feel you may be suffering from any of these conditions please contact a licensed mental health practitioner for an in-person consultation.

Questions may be edited for brevity and/or readability.

 
@mulwoodscribe, you might want to check out The Now Habit, by Neil Fiore. It is a bestselling book about procrastination, but his description of procrastination reads like it could be taken, almost word for word, out of a book by Dr. Sarno. Basically, procrastination is something that our unconscious minds do in order to protect ourselves from powerful unconscious emotions. Sounds familiar, right? That's exactly how Dr. Sarno explains TMS!

I learned about the book from a member of our forum named rdgrey. For him, The Now Habit was one of the things that helped him the most in overcoming his TMS. He wrote about it and about the connection between procrastination and TMS in this essay:
http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/What_Helped_Me_the_Most,_by_rdgray

Thanks for the great answer, Derek!
 
Thank you, Derek. I believe that are correct about my internalizing those feelings that my parents started. They are now mine and have been for decades. The challenge, as you said, is reconditioning my behavior, which is a major task, especially at my age (I'm 61). I will explore this further with my therapist and read Fiore's book as well. Thanks again for responding.
 
I just listened to this radio clip from a different place on the forum which makes that case for reprogramming our minds... I thought it reinforced the value of the intention. Might be a good one for you too. I'm "not young" too, but all we have is now. Let's make it work for us! Oops I thought I pasted in the clip but it didn't show up, it's from dr. Joe dispenza.
 
Shirley said:
I just listened to this radio clip from a different place on the forum which makes that case for reprogramming our minds... I thought it reinforced the value of the intention. Might be a good one for you too. I'm "not young" too, but all we have is now. Let's make it work for us! Oops I thought I pasted in the clip but it didn't show up, it's from dr. Joe dispenza.
Click to expand...
Thank you Shirley. I will check out Dr. Dispnza's clip.
 
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