Day 8 Pondering...

[hecate105]

I do like to ponder - it is a lovely bit of the course after an awful journaling bit!
I have had constant pain for more than 20 years and I am having great success at 'zapping' it and calling it out. It really works. But I have not been able to attribute it to a particular emotion that I have felt. I think I have repressed so much from childhood onwards that my 'reservoir' of rage/sorrow/fear is brimming with it all! Therefore - pain, lots of it, all the time. As I work thru the programme I hope I will get to a place where I can link the specific emotion to the pain, I will be well on the way to recovery then...

 

[Stella]

Hecate,
Like you I have repressed so much from my childhood that I feel nothing. In a nanosecond it goes through my mind into my body as depression and physical pain. For me it is all the personality traits that drive me. At first I only recognized 2 but I kept going back to the list, of course, now finding I have them all. They have driven me all my life. And I have found they are all tied in together as far as creating pain. I find quite often that several at the same time are contributing. It takes time to unwind all the pieces.

Be patient with yourself. I do believe lack of patience is one of the traits of TMSers. It will come when it comes.

 

[hecate105]

Stella, yes I think you are right - I'm not a patient person.... Maybe being a 'patient' for so long was to teach me patience!