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Pain Due To Good Things In Life

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Chimichanga, Jan 15, 2022.

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  1. Chimichanga

    Chimichanga Peer Supporter

    Hi Everyone,

    How does one deal with TMS pain and dysfunction when the emotions are related to positives in life: engagement, planning kids, house hunting with fiancé etc.

    Thank you
     
  2. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    I have not quite heard this put so bluntly, but I guess the place to inquire here is "what feelings are coming up which are hard to tolerate," evoked by these activities?

    I am supposing there are bits and pieces which threaten your identity in some way, or ?

    Perhaps you can tease these feelings out and then work with them directly. I suspect they are hidden since you don't describe them.
     
    Balsa11 likes this.
  3. mbo

    mbo Well known member


    Our "adult, rational side" is very happy with such good things but ....
    our (hidden in the subconscious) "childish, narcissistic, egotist, wild, irrational side" is very angry for the responsabilities, hard work, compromises, limitations,....accepted.
    Think about the post-partum depression.
    M
     
    Chimichanga likes this.
  4. Chimichanga

    Chimichanga Peer Supporter

    Great points, Andy.

    -Fear of marrying wrong person (not lasting for the long run).
    -Fear of being cheated on (my father cheated on mother growing up).
    -Fear of responsibilities. Maintaining good job.
    -Financial worries
    -Fear of being stuck in a long term mortgage, therefore stuck in a long term career.
    -Fear of losing my time and freedom

    Of course there are many things I am looking forward to, else I wouldn’t be planning all these things. But, I suppose the above are normal human feelings.

    Thank you
     
    Rainstorm B likes this.
  5. learningmore

    learningmore Peer Supporter

    Is it possible you are not desiring to do these things?

    One time I was in a relationship with a cluster B... I was supposed to be happy, but I wasn't. I kept telling myself I should be happy. I wasn't. I was apprehensive and stressed. My subconscious knew more than my cognition.
     
  6. Balsa11

    Balsa11 Well known member

    In this case being with a cluster B was actually a risky thing and the subconscious made an accurate call.
     
  7. Balsa11

    Balsa11 Well known member

    Seems like the body doesn't like those fears being repeated
     
  8. Chimichanga

    Chimichanga Peer Supporter

    Repeated? How so? I’ve never been married, had kids, or been cheated on before.
     
  9. Chimichanga

    Chimichanga Peer Supporter

    I think like many things in life, there are pluses and minuses.
     
  10. Balsa11

    Balsa11 Well known member

    Sorry, I meant fears being replayed in your mind
     
    Chimichanga likes this.

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