Oxygen, oxygen and more oxygen

[Pilot in pain]

Ok so quick couple of questions. I am on day 5 of the structured program and am blown away by the support in the forms. So my back is a complete mess. Pain shooting out from the neck, right and left of the spine at T4 from a hemivertebrae and a bulging L5 but no worse than anyone else on the planet but in pain at level 10 when I bend over, stand too long or sit too long. A few questions.

1) - I developed Chronic Fatigue in the last 1.5 years, it was so bad I was bed ridden for 2 months in June and July of last year. I went on IV treatments with mega doses of Vit C, glutathione, anything you could pump in me. Diagnosed with possible lyme disease, mycotoxin infections, Candida, you name it, apparently I had it. I started on my own medical grade ozone equipment and just found my body could eat it up. I started going to an ND and he had 08 - oztozone. The agerage Joe could get 20 ccs of it in their body and start kicking around with side effects and in this place I topped the charts with getting more of it in me than any other patient in 30 years. They were putting 500 ccs of it in my vein directly and I showed no symptoms at all. I was drinking 03 water, doing 03 saunas, insufflations of it in my ears, rectum, any possible way I could get it in me it was going in me. I should have been the highest oxygenated guy in america but the back pain just kept getting worse. With 500 CCs of pure 08 gas in my body I should have a system flooded with oxygen. I would do a double daily sauna with the tube of 03 pointing right into the area of pain in my back but the pain would never go away. If TMS is based on a lack of oxygen to certain parts of the body then would not helping the body with weekly ozone treatments or even hyperbaric chamber sessions increase your body's oxygen levels and hopefully rub out the ability for the brain to push and pull O2 from the areas of weakness?

2) from an execution point, when you start to feel strong pain coming on you know is TMS, does any one have comment on what they say to themselves to see if they can make it go away re their negative emotions? I had a very bad business deal go wrong and I lost a best friend because of it. I was extremely angry with him but I never said anything, kept it all bottled up like I always do and that all happened right at the same time this all happened. So for me all I have to do is sit for 20 minutes or even type like i am doing now as in just this last 5 minutes typing my entire neck is at level 10 pain and I have to stop to take breaks and look up and move around. So when the pain comes, do you just start to think about the bad event in your life? Do you get mad about it, do you say I am ok with it and I forgive and let it go or do you say I am really pissed at what happened and scream and shout or do you say I know this is the cause of my pain so I just have to accept it etc? Does anyone have any solid suggestions on what you need to do and how you tackle the negative issue when you know the pain in your back is coming from it?

3) I am journaling daily. I guess it is the process of writing the journals that brings the info to the forefront of the mind is that it? The more you write the more it comes out. It is the process of getting it all out of you and down on paper that is the beneficial thing or is journaling meant to stir up the memories and then you are supposed to forgive them or accept them and that is the process.

4) I am in the middle of a sports medicine rehab program to straighten out the curves in my spine. I am 2 months into it now and I still go twice a week. Am I screwing myself by doing this? I know the books say to cut all ties but I figure even just the stretching part of it has to be good for me no even though I know no matter how much they crack me around it is not going to make TMS pain go away. Should I cold turkey it or just keep going thinking in my head that I am just doing it to keep my body moving and active?

Anyway, can not wait to really master these techniques and tell all these doctors and chiropractors to go take a hike. So nice to be able to share my story and ask questions where people do not think you are crazy.

Pilot in Pain.

 

[hecate105]

Hi Pilot, If you click my name and then click my story you will see I have suffered debilitating pain for over 20 years which for many years kept me in a wheelchair. Believe me I have tried everything there is to try! This - TMS work - works!!
1. Oxygen - it is your autonomic system with-holding oxygen in the blood from parts of the body - as a mechanism to cause pain. So even if you were 99% oxygen - it would still with-hold oxygen from an area - you would then feel pain in that area. This is a common misunderstanding - on a few forums I used to use, fibromyalgia sufferers (actually TMS - but...) would read Sarno's books and then rush out to try 'boosting' their oxygen levels. This will not work. Obviously good levels of oxygen in the bloodstream are needed for a healthy body BUT it is the autonomic system with-holding it 'in' the body that causes pain - nothing to do with how much is in the body.
2/3. When I started this work - 4 months ago - I would say (aloud if no-one was around!) 'The sensation of pain in my neck (or shoulder, legs, back, feet ad nauseum...) is caused by my autonomic system with-holding oxygen from that area. It is doing this to distract me from realising that my unconscious is repressing emotions. There is no need for this anymore as I am dealing with the repressed emotions now.'
It drove me batty the first few weeks as I was saying it literally hundreds of times a day! As my body systems realised I was on to them - it declined to a dozen or so times a day.
I need to spend AT LEAST 2 hours a day doing TMS work. If I miss out on any of this - my pain gets worse again. Now I have accepted that and ploughed on for several months I am able to shorten my 'body-speak'. I now say at the slightest pain/fatigue - 'TMS demon -begone!!! ' I read Nancy Selfridge's 'Freedom from Fibromyalgia' and she advises you to name your TMS - to sort of personalise it - so you can be very direct!
She also advises on making an anger list - a list of EVERY time you have ever been angry/resentful/mad - you then go into a meditative state, find a lovely peaceful place where you feel safe - then you call back the situation in which you were angry, you feel the anger, you then alter the outcome to you winning the argument or coming out on top. Even, (and it sounds weird - and felt even weirder to do!) to the point of hitting, punching, shooting the opponent! The important thing is to experience the anger and convert it - so if someone really upset you at work - your boss demoted you and you felt it was unfair and swallowed down the anger - in the meditation - you might drag him/her across the desk and slap them till they gave you a raise instead!
It is amazing how different you feel afterwards. It is time-consuming to begin with (hey 47 years of anger to deal with!) but after a few days you can do 3 -8 items at a time. I have got through my 'backlog' now and just add items to the list when I remember them. I have found this a brilliant 'tool' to deal with unresolved anger. I tried other techniques - screaming into cushions, beating my mattress with a tennis racquet - but it just did not work for me.
I also journal pretty much every day, and try different techniques - like writing with the wrong hand. I go on this forum and ask questions - I also scan new posts in case I can add a comment - that really helps too - because other people (like you) bring up different subjects/problems/situations that set my mind thinking about stuff - tis all grist for the mill! I do a lot of mindfulness - again, I thought it seemed very basic and not much use - but I was SO wrong. I now do it several times a day, when walking the dog, sitting in the car - anywhere. I meditate every day too. I had tried this in years past and never kept it up - now I really feel that it calms me and helps me to see with more perspective. Also every day I read. Either re-read Sarno or Ozanovich or Selfridge, or things like 'Molecules of Emotion' by Candace Pert (the science behind emotions) You Can Heal Your Life by Louise Hay (oldie but goldie!) or any mind-body, meditation books. (and CDs)
I think it is identifying situations in the past that have upset you, identifying the triggers that make you feel that way again now, and dealing with those emotions (if needed - not everyone has to) Then changing how you relate to others so that you are not put in those positions again. Which are things like saying NO, understanding other peoples manipulations and firmly refusing to play ball, and avoiding getting into situations that make you uncomfortable. Stand up for YOU!
Once you are on your way to recovery and understand yourself - you are much more likely to be compassionate and understanding of others - without getting steamrollered by them!
4. Up to you whether you do the rehab or not - but - I bet my last dollar that you will not get well without fully embracing the TMS work!!!
So it's up to you - would you rather win a dollar - or lose one...!?

 

[njoy]

Hi, Pilot: these treatments must be costing you a lot of money, not to mention effort! That same commitment will get you to the right place with tms work and it will likely be cheaper.

1. For me, I have never bought into the oxygen thing but what do I know? If it's true, I'm pretty sure my tsm brain would rebel if I tried forcing oxygen into my body. "I'll show you!" -- tighten up, clamp down, ow!

2. When I feel strong pain (I used to have fibromyalgia constantly and can still get it when stressed) I do this:
- tell myself firmly "It's just tms". Luckily, I have learned enough to believe it.
- do my "parts" (Internal Family Systems) work -- talk to the part that is annoyed with life; hear its story; love up the "exile"; reparent and "unburden".
- distract myself by doing something fun (naps are good; so is visiting my dogs and chickens).
- work up some gratitude for how far I've come; say "thank you" for all the help I've received along the way to untwist myself and become the (relatively) calm and peaceful person I am today. Okay not always.

3. I journaled for many years -- really, I just vomited rage onto paper. Did it do any good? Maybe. It took other methods to get past my fury, though.

4. For me, physical therapies (including stretching) are not that useful. In fact, they irritate me. Now, Zumba -- that might work since I love to dance! Usually, I go outside and look at the lake and the beautiful place I live. But I'm not a very physically active person.

I think recovery from tms is a long process (although sudden improvements can occur, and have for me). It's a matter of mindfulness, education/reading/hanging out on the forums, trying out new things (patiently!), and gradually sorting all the crazy stuff that's messing up my head.

Have you signed up for the tms-ifs mailing list? Easily done, here: http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/mailing-list-for-parts-therapy-tms.2868/

Why not?

 

[hecate105]

I had not heard of parts therapy njoy, thanks for putting the link on - I've signed up!