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Day 1 Optimistic...

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by Elgar1857, Jun 24, 2015.

  1. Elgar1857

    Elgar1857 Newcomer

    Hello all! I've decided to give Dr Sarno's method a go after a year of frustrating back pain. I've had an ultrasound, x-Ray and blood tests, all of which have come back showing nothing to worry about (apart from a vitamin A deficiency which the doctor said could contribute to joint pain.) I have been to osteopaths and have orthotics and have had physio. The physio seems to have helped for a time and then it relapses. Since I am relatively young (not yet 30) and fit otherwise my physiotherapist suggested Dr Sarno's book as an alternative idea.

    The most difficult pain is in the mornings. It started about a year ago, and I think I can count on the fingers of one hand the number of mornings since when I have woken up without it. Some days are worse than others but most days, I wake up with lower back pain that forces me to get up and move around. Having moved around it subsides and sometimes doesn't return for the rest of the day. Other days it recurs throughout the day. What I have found most frustrating is that there is no logical pattern to it, no outside influences that I can pin down - this has helped lead me to think about TMS.

    History: I have a history of "events" going back as far as school. The first was when I was 17: I felt a twinge when doing someone mundane like bending to put on my socks(!) and my lower back went into spasm. I could barely walk or fully straighten my back and I had to sleep on my front with a pillow beneath my stomach. This lasted a few days and I went back to normal, though with some recurring soreness in my lower back. I had a couple more of these events over the years. My mum blamed my wearing high heels everyday at school and sure enough when I went to university where I wore flats most of the time, I had no problems for the whole three years! See how easy it is to create triggers; ever since then I've been weary of wearing heels!

    There was one more of these spasm events after university (at my in-laws' house - perhaps a source of anxiety?!) and then for most of my twenties I got soreness after long periods of standing or walking but I would just stretch it out and it would get better, and I'd brush it off with "I've got a dodgy/weak/useless back." I was scared of physical activity and didn't do much until the last few years, and then I went for the rowing machine and cross-trainer to avoid the lower-back impact of running. More recently I have been running more and I love it. It hasn't made my back worse so I figure I should keep on with it for all it's other benefits.

    So the last year's morning back pain has been something of a mystery, and in addition I have found standing for long periods difficult too - I am a singer and often have to do six hours in a day of standing still for recording sessions and I've had a few where I've been in quite a bit of pain by the end of the day.

    I feel empowered by the thought that there is nothing physically wrong with me and I feel that this acceptance has aready made a difference to my day to day pain, though this may be a placebo, but the morning pain is deeper, clearly. I fit the personality profile perfectly and I have always been eager to please other people and keep the peace - I hate conflict and confrontation. I'm a perfectionist and a high achiever and often get frustrated with myself for not getting things right straight away. In a brief foray into what might be an emotional cause for me, I noticed that the first spasm event at school was about a year after my father was diagnosed with early-onset Parkinson's disease. So perhaps that is an area to explore...

    Thank you for reading this far, I promise my subsequent posts won't be this long!!
  2. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Elgar. Your post says you are a perfectionist and want to please people. Those alone are major causes of TMS pain.
    And your father's illness adds to it.

    I think your symptoms are TMS and am glad you discovered Dr. Sarno's books and this web site. The Structured Education Program is a wonderful way to learn the emotional causes of pain and how to deal with them. Many times, healing comes from believing 100 percent that the symptoms are TMS, emotionally caused, and not structural. Or if there are some structural problems, they may very well have been caused by TMS emotions.

    You've just begun the SEP and will find a lot of help in it. Journaling is an important aid in healing.

    Try not to be so demanding of yourself. Find ways to enjoy each day and not worry about your health or anything else.

    Try to live in the present, and not worry about what happened in the past. Dr. Sarno says we need to discover the
    emotional problems causing our pain, but we do not have to solve them. Our subconscious knows what they are and
    wants us to accept them.

    Watch the success videos on this web site and by looking up TMS on YouTube. Be confident you are going to heal
    and you will.
    Elgar1857 likes this.

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