1. Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this link: http://go.tmswiki.org/newprogram
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Day 6 No more doubt, interesting stuff going on

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by c90danwaiel, Oct 14, 2016.

  1. c90danwaiel

    c90danwaiel Peer Supporter

    I no longer have any doubt about TMS. I posted in another part of this forum about having an experience where I was able to shift the pain away from my pelvis to my feet. Since then, it's been moving everywhere. I've felt the burning pain not only in my feet and pelvic area, but in my calves, my stomach, chest, inner arms - it's been moving all over.

    The pain has been worse overall, I'd say, since finding out about TMS but I'm much better at coping with it. I've done a good job at not focusing on the pain. Before, it'd literally occupy by thoughts 80% of the time. Today, I only thought about it maybe 30% of the time. I wonder if I'm experiencing an extinction burst. I'm powering through though, and trying my best to stick to outcome independence.

    I also had some fairly deep realizations that other day. I'll admit, I'd been fairly skeptical until now about the repressed emotion bit. But I may have made a breakthrough on that point.

    Before my pain started - nearly four months ago - I did have quite a bit of inner rage, dating back to about four years prior. It was a really bad situation with work. The rage really had built up in me, and I've forgotten how often I thought about it, even just earlier this year, before my pain came along and took my focus away. I'd go on a bike ride, and I'd think about how I felt wronged and mistreated. I'd walk on the treadmill, and I'd think about it. I'd have a random thoughts throughout the day about that period in my life, and mutter things under my breath, almost automatically.

    I've also realized, I've actually had TMS for a very long time. There was a situation when I was younger that lasted a few months, but it really began in earnest about that damaging experience with work for years ago.

    I started developing a lot of various health 'issues' during this time: strange intestinal issues that lasted months, tendonitis, an ulcer. Strangely, I seem to have gaps in my journaling at the time I had these issues: I'd given up my outlet and was running full blast at work.

    Before my pelvic pain - currently my primary symptom - I developed knee pain on my cycling - removing one of my major outlets to get out, do something I enjoyed, and think about my emotions and my past. Hoping to take that up again once the weather improves, or find some other source of exercise to help vent.
     
  2. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Dan. It looks like you're doing a very good job of discovering the emotional causes of your pain.

    As for random thoughts in your head while you ride your bike and other things, I recommend a video on Yutube called Detachment from Overthinking.

    Try to keep doing things you enjoy, like riding your bike. Exercise plays a big role in TMS healing.
     
  3. c90danwaiel

    c90danwaiel Peer Supporter

    Hi Walt,

    Thanks for the recommendation! Had a great day today. I had a noticeable reduction in symptoms. They'd been ramped up ever since I started reading about TMS, which I heard could happen as your subconscious tries to distract you. I pushed through and did my best not to focus on the pain or give into fear about the pain.

    Today, I had a few pain-free hours and my pain is really low tonight, which is great, since I haven't had a low pain night in about a week. Did some intense journaling last night, which led to my first low-pain night. Hoping there's a connection there! Looking forward to doing more of that.

    Went on another bike ride today when there was a gap in the rainy weather. I've been in very good spirits. Even found out that the same Medical Center where I've been trying for the past three months to find a physical cause for my pain has a pain center with a very strong mind-body approach. One of their back surgeons, who's heavily involved in that center, had a bad bout of TMS himself and also realized that a great deal of people he operated on weren't actually improving with surgery. Looks like he's worked a lot of with Dr. Schubiner. Hoping to get in there to get some outside assistance, since I think that could be really helpful if I have a bad relapse, which I'm preparing myself for. I know this could be a long journey still and am prepared for that. In the mean time, I'm celebrating the end to a very good day!
     
  4. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi again Dan.Glad to hear you're doing so well. Your strong belief in TMS is having some great results.

    What luck for you to have learned that a back surgeon at the medical center you go to believes in the MindBody connection. I'm sure he's going to help you a lot.
     

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