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New here- healed once before, but need encouragement on this "new problem"

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by amagnuson amy, Dec 17, 2014.

  1. amagnuson amy

    amagnuson amy New Member

    Hello everyone,
    I am new new here. This sounds like a great encouraging place to help someone heal!
    So about me (hopefully without going into too much unnecessary detail!):
    Over 9 years ago, I was a mess. Awful pelvic pain and sickness. Back then I did the nonsense medical route for a short time. Tests, exams, some 'labels" thrown on me and not any help offered. Nothing really threatening diagnosed but told it was "incurable." Just live in pain more or less. Long story short, I did heal. My immune system was shot back then. I did some detoxing & cleansing . My immune system is amazingly strong now and I never get sick. The pelvic pain resolved a lot. It was a combination of soaking myself in mind/body books. I chose to believe the mind can heal. And my mind helped me heal a lot. On a physical side of what helped also was going to a NUCCA chiropractor who also didn't believe I had all that much wrong with me and believed I would fully heal the random pelvic and back pain. He did trigger point muscle work on my abs and legs along with the most gentle neck alignment (as NUCCA is very gentle and not your traditional chiropractic care.) ( physical therapy, acupuncture, zone therapy, Cranial sacral therapy, nothing worked for the pelvic pain until NUCCA/ trigger point and believing strongly that I would be ok.)

    So I did get pretty well. Mild pelvic stuff would come and go over the last several years but nothing that was debilitating me. And I would just be fine. That was until last spring after doing some core abdominal new exercise routine. ( and lots of personal family worry and job STRESS.) ( I had been doing Pilates abdominal core stuff right prior to problems starting the first time 9 years ago - coincidence?). Then all this summer increased pelvic stuff on and off, but not awful . Then since October, I have just been yuck! I am not getting out of it like I would expect. The pelvic stuff isn't really what I had before because it's just in different locations pelvic wise. So it is weird and scary. Went to dr for a couple checks and of course they don't know.

    Sooo, I read dr. Sarno. I connect to the TMS theory. I searched inside me for repressed feelings. I know I had lots of negatives emotions at the time of this onset last spring and even more so this fall because of anxiety/ fear over issues with my kids and horrible stress at my job which is my own in home daycare. I have had some very difficult daycare kids and parents over the last several months. It caused emotions of worry, anxiety and resentment/anger and lots of frustration. And 12 hour work days with very little sleep. I've made some changes and beginning this month, my hours are down to 10 hours and then I will be able to work 7:00-4:30 beginning January. So that's great and I have eliminated some of my stressful parents and kids. So things are looking up. I acknowledge my negative emotions I felt over the last several months as I felt more stress in those months then ever. But symptoms aren't improving.

    I believe my mind is a part of these new random pains that literally change location and sensation several times a day but there's some less stress. But again, no improvement. Please anyone share thoughts. Especially pelvic and low back/ leg pain experiences and healings. I should have more trust in myself as I healed a lot before. But I am in this terrible feeling of panic/ worry of shedding this pain this time. I just feel yuck!

    Thank you to anyone who can lift me up a little and share your thoughts or experiences.
    Stella and Eric "Herbie" Watson like this.
  2. E. Lynn

    E. Lynn Peer Supporter

    Hi Amy,
    It sounds like you are dealing with fun, crazy world of too much stress (and TMS). Stress can do a number on your body. It can give you all kinds of weird pains or feelings, from your head to your toes(I've been there). In the past, you got relief from the pelvic pain from trigger point therapy. To me, that means the pelvic pain in muscular and caused by tension. Tms and stress goes hand in hand. You really do sound like you know what you have is TMS, but are scared because it is taking longer to go away. The subconscious mind is a complicated thing. The human brain is a complicated thing. I never knew how much so until I learned about TMS. The pain will go away when it wants to go away, and it might be slower than you want, but that's okay. You are doing the right thing to de-stress your life, that's only going to make it go away sooner. Just trust in the process. It may not be the exact same process as before, but you'll get there. Have you ever read "Help and Hope for your Nerves" by Claire Weeks? It might help you with your panic and worry.

    E. Lynn :)
  3. amagnuson amy

    amagnuson amy New Member

    E. Lynn, Thank you so much for the encouragement! And I will check out Claire weeks.
    I guess since I was doing well for so long and this relapse" came on, it has so me so scared and worked up snd just looking for hope again. As I've read through this site, I've read some very encouraging support.
  4. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    We're all here to help each other.
    My next-door neighbor says she's stressed out from preparing for Christmas.
    So are we all!
    We need to take time out for ourselves.
    lorrie likes this.
  5. amagnuson amy

    amagnuson amy New Member

    Thanks Walt for all your encouraging support throughout this site!
  6. pilatesgirl

    pilatesgirl Peer Supporter

    Hi Amy,
    I am sorry to hear about your pelvic symptoms! I understand exactly how upsetting they can be. Long hours and caring for young children (I taught early childhood for 15 years) is highly stressful.
    I want to first start off by giving you hope that you can once again live a pain free life. Pelvic pain is difficult because it is private and not easily understood. It's not something you can comfortably bring up in conversation when talking with a friend and
    Most medical professionals are completely ignorant about it. The fact that you were told the first time that this would continue for the rest of your life, yet the "professionals" didn't know what exactly was wrong, is not only riduclious but insulting.

    I too was seen by " everyone". I even traveled thousands of miles away to see the very best pelvic floor physical therapist in the world! I spent thousands of dollars on therapies, vitamins and doctors.

    I am currently completely pain free. I have no symptoms at all. With that being said, my recovery has been up and down. I recently went through a flare up that lasted a month long. For me, the fear of the pain and hypervigilance of every feeling in that area of my body is what continues the cycle. The reason the flare up continued so long was because I was afraid of the pain again and I started listening in on every single noise or feeling in that area.
    Once I started to practice Claire Weekes method for anxiety recovery the pain began to go away.. I also recently found out I have hypothroidism and I believe that was affecting my mood.

    I tried but, I never connected with the repressed memory/emotion theory and found myself more anxious trying to find the one repressed memory. Once I let that go and focused on allowing the pain to be there without reacting to it, the pain slowly dissolved.
    It takes practice and patience. Daily practice. Allowing painful symptoms is difficult at first because it seems so opposite of what we naturally want to do. That's why it takes time and practice. There will be times when it seems impossible or too difficult. I've been there. You can do it. Accept. Allow. Repeat.

    One of the things that helped me in the beginning was when I noticed my body was holding tension and I was filled with anxiety/fear I would start by just letting my posture go, my muscles(especially ab muscles) to let go and physically slump in my chair or whatever position I was in.

    That helped me to realize just how much tension I was holding in my body. I would have to do that over and over because I was so used to holding/bracing from the pain. Then I would talk to myself repeat things like: "Just allow the symptoms to be there." " they can't hurt you". This didn't happen overnight. It took time but each day would build on the day before and eventually I noticed less pain walking, sitting. I still had / have certain triggers but once again I practice allowing and not reacting.

    I also recommend Claire Weekes books. They are timeless and have helped me not only with this experience but with past experiences.
    I know you sent me a private message but I thought I would respond here in case there are other women with pelvic pain reading this thread.

    I hope this brings you some relief and hope. It will happen again for you and this time around you will have more tools in your tool box.

  7. amagnuson amy

    amagnuson amy New Member

    Hi julie,
    Oh my gosh- thanks so much for the reply! I am so glad to hear you're doing well!!! This just had to go away again like before-, it just has to!!!

    pilatesgirl likes this.
  8. amagnuson amy

    amagnuson amy New Member

    Hi Walt,
    I notice a lot in your posts about encouraging people to live in the moment. Can you help me understand more on that? I admit currently thus is consuming me and I don't want it to. I want to live normal again so much!

  9. mike2014

    mike2014 Beloved Grand Eagle

  10. Alysa

    Alysa New Member

    Wow. After nearly eight months of every doctor in the area plus some outside the area, as well as some very invasive and degrading tests...alas I have found this. This is the BEST advice. What a love filled, compassionate community of TMSers.
    Dahlia, Ellen and pilatesgirl like this.

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