Need Some Confirmation...

[Jaxson]

Greetings,
I just need some confirmation and clarification..

Although Sarno says that it’s not about changing the personality because I’ll always be generating unconscious rage; therefore, do I just continue to do whatever it is that I’m doing to enrage myself without altering those aspects of my personality.... is simple awareness (or suspicion) needed here.. (i.e., I HAVE to go to work today, or, I'm doing this perfectly... this, I’m sure, is enraging) ?

Or...am I trying to “get in touch” with my feelings, allowing them to rise, feel all the rage, guilt, fear and other feelings individually and release every last one of them?. It seems that if I'm releasing feelings and still generating them...I'm breaking even.


….any wisdom is appreciated

Love & Courage to ALL

 

[Ellen]

Jaxson,

Repressed emotions are in our unconscious, which creates TMS symptoms to distract us out of a fear that if these emotions are known to the conscious, they will be unacceptable. If we become aware of what these repressed emotions are through a process of journaling or psychotherapy, and we accept that we have these emotions, then there is no longer any need for the unconscious to generate TMS as a distraction. So the key is awareness and acceptance of emotions, and linking them to our TMS. Yes, we will continue to have the full range of emotions as we are human. But we don't have to live with pain.

Hope this answers your questions. Some other members may have a different take on it.

Please feel free to keep asking questions. We are all here to support one another.

 

[Jaxson]

Thank you! I'm taking your words with me to my therapy appointment today to show my therapist....and I'll continue to hear them...Thank You!

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Jaxson, good luck at your therapy appointment today. Let us know how it went.

Be kind to yourself and try to forgive those who "trespassed" against you.

 

[Andy Bayliss]

Although Sarno says that it’s not about changing the personality because I’ll always be generating unconscious rage; therefore, do I just continue to do whatever it is that I’m doing to enrage myself without altering those aspects of my personality.... is simple awareness (or suspicion) needed here.. (i.e., I HAVE to go to work today, or, I'm doing this perfectly... this, I’m sure, is enraging) ?

Or...am I trying to “get in touch” with my feelings, allowing them to rise, feel all the rage, guilt, fear and other feelings individually and release every last one of them?. It seems that if I'm releasing feelings and still generating them...I'm breaking even.

Hi Jaxson,
You ask a great question, because Dr. Sarno is in essence saying that we do not have to feel the feelings---because as Ellen says we can't---but instead use our imaginations to posit what the Inner Child or Id is experiencing. At the same time Dr. Sarno says that 20% of his patients will need therapy to allow more feelings to come forth. With the therapist you are seeing, you are on your way either way!

Part of the benefit of feeling more of your feelings is not that you are releasing them as much as you develop understanding for the psycho-dynamics to both confirm the Sarno thesis (understand the hurt, rage, and so on). The other piece (maybe some could call "releasing") is that by feeling more, we are closer to ourselves. There is more tenderness and flow, and this is satisfying to deep parts of us that may then fight less. There is less inner tension. We see ourselves more deeply, and this can address TMS, I believe. Importantly in all of this there is more self compassion, and this works as an antidote to the TMS type personalities over time. Like Walt suggests, we might be more kind to ourselves. This is not easy unless we understand our suffering. And we don't understand our suffering by just thinking. We have to feel also.

Andy B.

 

[Jaxson]

..that's beautiful! Thank you...