My Story

crimslock

crimslock

Peer Supporter
I feel the need to share my story. So here goes....

I have tried all types of massage technique's, Osteopath's, Chiropractors and Physio's with no success. The physio stretches made it worst. Even swimming has made it worst. I have had xrays, cat scans and MRI. All perfect disc etc So doctors and back surgenys are baffled.

1988:
Back pain and sever headaches (migraines) when i was 10
Would come out of know were and would drop to my knees and cry. Doctor said i had tight hamstrings and to stretch them.
All went away within a year......

1999:
Mental Health problems arose when i was 21.
- Panic attacks, Obsessive Compulsive disorder (unwanted thoughts which couldn't stop coming or couldn't make go away), agoraphobia (fear of leaving home)
- Treatment from psychiatrist who gave me anti-depressants, very heavy/strong drugs they gave me. Went back to normal life by 2001 but was never the same. Because of mental health problems i react when i take any form of herbs or medication. I get serve anxiety attacks with burning in face and arms and real bad anger....

2003:
Sever migraines, heat and burning in neck and extreme vomiting when i was 25.
Tried all doctors and couldn't find any problems. Natural path helped the problem with supplements and changed diet. Natural path said i have major digestive problems. I noticed if i eat bad food like yeast, sweats and hard to digestive foods like lettuce and spinach i get the sever migraines, heat and burning in neck and extreme vomiting. I still haven't fully recovered from this... also at that time i quit smoking and my sleep problems started. I now struggle to fall asleep and stay a sleep. Average 4 - 6 hours per night.

2009:
Mental Health problems came back when i was 31.
Jan 2009 i weighed 113k and height approx 5 feet 10 inches, i lost 30kg by June 2009 by eating very well, road running 5 kms per day, bike riding 13 kms every few days, weights at gym.
Around June 2009 i set up home weight gym and had first back flair up after using the weights. I tried Osteopath to fix back but wouldn't settle down. So i tried massage therapist and after it got sever panic attack which had not happened since 2001.. Then my mental problems all came back really really bad. I have just put up with mental health problems which is a lot better now but still not 100%. I did not take any medication or herbs for this.

2010 Feb:
Major back problems.
I had a bad back but was living a normal life and didn't have many symptoms. Then i was riding a wave on my body board and the wave dumped on top of my back. That night woke up with serve pain and burning in the center of my spine around the lower to middle of my back L1 T 12.
Since then i have gotten worse and worse with new symptoms all the time... here is a list of my current problems
- Burning when sit in hamstring area, lower and middle back - very server
- Burning when lye down in hamstring area and calf's - very server
- Pain in lower back, middle back
- Pain in back if stand to long
- Pain in hips/pelvis when i lye on either side and when really bad when sitting and standing - very server
- Pain in thorasic region when lye on my stomach
- Pain in thorasic region
- Pain in chest near ribs

2011 June
Car accident, whiplash, my head went from left to right and hit car window on driver side. Soft tissue injury. Recovered now but can flair up if i use neck a lot. Treatment was physio therapy.

12 June
Discovered all my health problems are from TMS. TEARS OF JOY!!!!!!!!!!
Finally know what has been the real cause of all the back pain, insomnia and anxiety disorders...
I have TMS I have TMS I have TMS and will be pain free when the time is right. 100% confident in the diagnosies. Already been able to do physical stuff which hadn’t done in years but my mate burning just will not bugger off!!!
 
Hi Crimslock,

Like you when i was going down the physical route the doctors couldn't find anything with all their tests to point the pain at.
My chronic back pain also began after some anxiety i was experiencing cleared up.

I stopped being anxious through exercise and healthy living and out of nowhere the back stuff started up. Pretty obvious now the two are related.
Im in Sydney and see your an Aussie, Where are you from?
 
As you seem to have discovered (the hard way), TMS pain and anxiety are two halves of the same coin.
 
G'day Max,

From Belmont, Newcastle.. About 1 hour 45 from Sydney. I moved up to Newy in 98 from Baulkham Hills, Sydney were i was born and grew up. Where in Sydney you from??? You found any TMS doc's or therapist in Sydney?? None up here mate, bloody awful A...
Max thanks for you post, it was comforting to see some else had their back pain start after healthy living and exercise because i have felt for years i am going crazy. Because i did the the correct things and wham bam i get back pain out of the blue. Sometime wish i never lost all the weight and stayed a fat bastard so then the back pain nightmare wouldn't have started. It still really annoys me that all my back pain and mental health problems started after doing the right thing and looking after myself. I really struggle with anger and resentment towards that. Good to chat Max P>>
 
Hi Mate,
I live in the Northern beaches and have all my life. Iv'e got some family up in Newcastle and go up there quite a bit, It's a great spot.
Apparently there is a TMS doc in Sydney now but he doesn't exactly advertise as one. On the other TMS forum TMSHelp.com another Australian told me she has been seeing him and that he treats his patients as per Sarno. She didn't say who he was in her post so i have tried to contact her to find his details and will let you know once i hear from her.

Apart from that there is a guy in Melbourne called Hal Greenham from mindbodyhealing.com and i have skyped with him before. He is a TMS therapist but cured himself of TMS and knows his stuff. You said yourself Specialists couldn't find a reason for your pain so you can be sure it's TMS. I hear your frustration with the pain after getting fit stuff.... Mine came along when i was weight training 4 days a week and swimming 10 km's a week. I woke up one day and there it was!

Im sure we'll both get there it just might take some time.
Good luck
 
Crimslock said:
Discovered all my health problems are from TMS. TEARS OF JOY!!!!!!!!!!
Finally know what has been the real cause of all the back pain, insomnia and anxiety disorders...
I have TMS I have TMS I have TMS and will be pain free when the time is right. 100% confident in the diagnosies.
Click to expand...

When I first discovered all my problems were TMS, I had that same joy. It felt so great to finally know what was causing me so many different symptoms. Also, your statement that you will be pain free when the time is right, is a great way to go about your recovery. Don't put pressure on yourself or set a timetable to recover by. The key is to begin to think psychologically, and you can't do that if you say you have to recover in a month.

Hal Greenham's contact info is at http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/Additional_TMS_Practitioners#Australia . He also completed the Survey Response Form. As someone who has recovered from TMS, he really understands how to get better, and I have heard other people mention that he has helped him out.

If you haven't yet, check out Enrique's Story and I'm a TMSer Triathlete. It is really inspiring stuff.
 
G'Day Crimslock,

I have been skyping Hal Greenham for a couple of weeks, and I am glad I have had the benefit of his theoretical knowledge and hard won insights, as a former "TMS Battler".

The guy is an inspiration.

I reckon you would gain here, too.
 
Crimslock:

I have the same burning in my hamstrings that you described and pain that radiates to my glutes. Makes sitting hard.

I am new here.... any advice? p.s. I am in the US.
 
G'day Explorer,

I am so happy you have found out about TMS, you are now on the healing road. And its a great road of self discovery. Honestly i wish i never had all my pain but and a big but, during the TMS treatment process i have learnt so much about myself and life. It has been a blessing.

Ok RE burning, thats my biggest hurdle. It really wont "bugger of" yet for me, but i have had times when it almost disappeared and i can deal with it a lot better. I would suggest "talk to your brain" When i am noticing the burning or its really bad so i cant not notice it i talk to my brain, for example:

- I know what your doing, your trying to distract me from my emotions. You mean nothing to me burny, ha ha your funny burny or
- Few deep breaths. I am healthy and strong. Sitting here is normal and will not hurt me. Sitting will no longer cause me any burning. The burning is harmless and will be gone soon. I realise the burning is just a way to distract me from emotions. Brain stop producing these symptoms immediately.

When i first started i made a little card with a few lines and every time the burning would start i would read it over and over again. I don't use a card anymore (remember) just mix it all up and say different things. I use the following:

- Deep breaths, I'm healthy & strong, my back is fine and strong, "Activity or trigger: sitting, running, bend etc.." is normal and will not cause me pain, the pain is harmless and just a way to distract me from my emotions, laugh at it, there is nothing seriously wrong with my body, the TMS symptom will subside soon, tell it to stop producing the symptoms...

Another thing i do is think of a unpleasant time in my life when i am noticing the TMS symptoms. Example, sitting at my desk at work and the burning is really bad, i will focus on "the time my ex cheated on me and the emotions/feelings from that time" I know this seems odd, to be thinking of hurtful feelings all day but honestly i really dont understand it, but it works, and i haven't gone mad or not a basket case from doing it.

Lastly none of the above will not work if you don't 100% accept and truly believe in TMS. I would suggest read Sarno book over and over again and all the stuff on the Wiki site. i find keeping a note pad next to me writing down the ah moments really heaps. I also use to go over and over the daily reminders and write them down... though be careful you dont become obsessive and not taking it in. I found myself doing tht a lot. When you are reading, just take your time, very very slowly and let it all sink in. No point reading 3 chapters and not learning. lol i did that a lot. Ok my TMS personality is taking over so i better stop now....

Thank you for your courage to post, we all believe in you, you will be better!!!!
 
Chrimslock:

Thanks for all the good advice!!! I will work to deploy your strategies. And your inputs on taking it slowly are helpful. I did cram in Santos' almost all at once and found myself re-reading it today.

And although I posted this already, I've had a little bit of a set back. Starting Monday I was gleeful to learn about TMS. It described me to a tee. Then finding the site, and getting the books, I was on my way to recovery. Then.... I did something stupid, I met with a pain specialist who I had an appointment with before I had TMS and my fears of having fibro returned. What has said was, I don't know if you have fibro, but you are fibro-like. That is a have sensitivity to pain in my arms, legs and trunk. Which makes we feel a little different from others on this site. It seems like folks are dealing with one area of the body and not multiple areas.

Any way, he also said he thought I would heal and the fibro goes away. Which wasn't how I understood it. I should have kept it at two docs saying I didn't have it. But no, I had to have a third opinion. Crazy.

I am going to go do some meditation and journaling. I know I can get well, and the pent up anger is the cause. My talk with my therapist this morning showed that!

Thanks again for replying. Every word of support counts!

take care,
Susan
 
Hi, Susan,
How are you doing? I can truly feel for you when you get either a doctor or friend's opinion that is opposed to TMS.
We have to just stay the course and take a firm stand against TMS.

We will surely get there.
G.R.
 
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