My Story - Seeking Guidance...

Hi guys,

I have been reading on this forum for sometime now and have finally decided to post and seek some guidance. any help will be greatly appreciated. Below is my story:

About 3 yrs ago I believe I damaged my back while doing deadlifts in the gym. Since then to this day I have have been suffering from Sciatica. It used to be restricted to my left butt and I was able to do most activities that didn't involve stretching my leg or bending fwd. But, around 4 months ago the pain started to get worse and I started feeling it behind the left knee on the outside. The back of my thigh got numb and I can feel tingling in the heel. The left calf also feel tight and sort of slightly weak.

Now I feel pain while running, jumping and while sleeping it actually wakes me up. Sleeping was a problem before, but I figured out what positions were pain free. But, now there are only two positions I can sleep in and that too are with pain. I'm twisting in the bed every few hrs until I get up in the morning. Sitting on cushy surface has always been a problem since I have had sciatica.

In 2015 I was diagnosed with Inflammatory Bowel Disease. It tends to come and go. I have never taken any medication for it. At the moment my bowel is absolutely fine.

I finished reading Healing Back Pain in Jan. It had no effect on me. I do believe in the concept, but still tried other treatments, like Bowen therapy and Indian Ayurvedic oil massages. I have tried physio and yoga in the past and nothing so far has helped. I guess the book didn't have much effect because I was still interested in other therapies.

At this stage the numbness in the back of my thigh has reduced, but still there. It gets worse if I sit for too long. E.g. long journey in a car. I'm going to the gym, but avoid doing anything that I think can make it worse.

Pain spot - In Jan 2017 I discovered there is a spot in my lower back to the left of my spine that when slightly pressed with a thumb gives me pain straight away. I don't have any low back pain apart from when this spot is pressed. All the pain is in the left butt and at times behind the knee on the outside on the left.

My MRI report summarises - The major abnormality is at L5-S1 where there is a left sided disc protrusion with compression of the left S1 nerve root (report att.).

Plan of action started:

1. Reading - Undivided Mind
2. Reading - The Power of Now
3. Apr 09: Finished going through the - TMS Recovery Program on TMS Wiki
4. Apr 17: Started the - Structured Educational Program
5. Have started reading the - Success Story Database page
6. Continue with the gym and will slowly start doing exercises that are painful to defeat the mind

So far from what I have read I fit the TMS personality traits profile perfectly. I have self diagnosed myself as suffering form TMS based on my research. I whole heartedly believe in this theory its a matter of convincing the mind now.

It'll be great to hear your thoughts on my situation and whether I'm on the right track with my 'Plan of Action'.

Thank you for your time reading my post.

Cheers
Shori

 

Hi Shori,

Welcome to the forums! You're in the right place for healing to begin.

This most definitely sounds like TMS to me...sounds like you still have some doubts in the diagnosis since you attached your MRI? If that is the case then rest assured- many of us on this forum, myself included, have similar MRIs with disc herniations, protrusions, etc- mine also said my S1 nerve root was compressed, for the record! As a PT I was especially worried about this prior to discovering TMS! Your MRI shows nothing concerning, so rest easy. I also had back pain and sciatica that has since disappeared completely.

After finding TMS, I read all the Sarno books, did the SEP, got on these forums and read some books by other TMS practitioners. It's really all about reinforcing your belief in the concept and re-training yourself to think psychologically. Once you are able to let go of the structural explanation for your pain, the rest will follow. You can start to think of the pain as a signal that something is going on psychologically.

In terms of your plan- be cautious about doing painful exercises in the gym, this could result in frustration and prolong the process. Ramp up gradually with your activity, testing the limits of what you can do without being in severe pain. Keep reading success stories, try other books by TMS practitioners like Howard Schubiner, David Schecter, Steve Ozanich and Georgie Oldfield.

Let me know if you have questions, and again welcome

 

Thank you for going through my long post MindBodyPT, much appreciated.

I do have a lot of reading to do. I will take your point on the gym workout also. Its best to test my limits slowly as you suggested.

I mentioned in my post that there is this point in my lower back to the left of my spine that when pressed with a finger or with the palm causes pain instantly or aggravates existing pain even more. Why is this so if there is no structural issue?

Cheers

 

Recall that TMS can cause many tender points and trigger points in any part of the body. I also had specific tender points next to my spine like that. The mind can create very real, physical changes (that are reversible) due to emotions.

 

Shori, like you I had debilitating sciatic pain every day for over a year. My MRI showed a disc bulge and at my worst point was consulting with surgeons about a fusion because the pain was so bad. I'm happy to report that I rarely have sciatic pain anymore. It will typically flare up if I'm really stressed out but never for more then a day or two. I've even had months of no pain at all.
Go easy on yourself and know that TMS is a journey, not a destination. It took me a while to get to that point. Focus on the psychological and get your nervous system calmed down.

 

Thank you guys. I'm so glad I found this forum. I can't remember when was the last time I had a minute without pain.

Need to fix this...slow and steady.