My big current stressor

Fellow Tms`ers

I realized that most of my anger and fear, stress, anxiety and so on, is from my current relationship with my wife which we are currently in the process of discussing divorce ( long time coming) we realized that we are at a dead end and even though we tried its not happening we have 2 older children so its not much of a issue. We both are living in the same house and sleeping in same bed, which I know is not good for me and there is no where for me to go.. also we are not arguing or anything like that. But I know its causing a lot of emotions that I am holding on to even though I have told her what I am feeling. Just wanted to share my thoughts and situation.

Holding On

 

Your marital situation is bound to bring on TMS. Is it possible to sleep in another room? Even the couch or an inflatable or
roll-away bed might be better and leave your wife have the bed. Even many happily married couples sleep apart,
in separate bedrooms. Playwright Charles MacArthur and his wife actress Helen Hayes had separate apartments, on opposite
ends of Manhattan.

Friends of mine tried living apart instead of divorcing. She preferred renting an apartment nearby and left him have the house.
This went on for a year and then she decided to try the marriage again and it worked. A wonderful 1940 British movie was made on the subject,
called "Vacation from Marriage," with Robert Donat and Deborah Kerr. I think Netflix has the DVD for rent. You and your wife might both like it.

Meanwhile, it's one of the most common things for marital difficulties to cause TMS. When those are resolved, pain will go away.

 

Thx Walt for your advice…its a interesting approach