Muscle tension throughout my body just keeps getting worse. I'm getting to where I can barely function. My legs and arms often lock up. For example, when I try to turn around my torso moves but my legs stay put until I can figure out a workaround. But sometimes I can still turn with little resistance. I also get really tense when I sleep. I tend to feel best just before bed, but when I wake up I feel more rigid than ever. A thought occurred to me recently. I suspect some part of my mind doesn't feel safe unless I'm tense. I think this has been the case since early adulthood some 35-40 years ago. I remember lying in bed back then and feeling some slight tension. I tried to relax but found the sensation of loosening up somewhat frightening so I let myself tense up again. I think that small bit of tension has gradually increased over time putting me where I am now. My tension has increased significantly in the current political climate. I also noticed a significant tightening in the past few days when I read a disturbing discussion on Facebook about one of my favorite high school teachers being involved in inappropriate relations with several female students - including one girl whose affections I sought unsuccessfully (now I know why I she rejected me all those years ago). Things that help me loosen up a bit include getting into a TV show or movie with a good story, putting my MP3 player on shuffle and moving as best I can to the music, and EFT tapping. Also, anything that involves a genuine sense of urgency will free my muscles for a moment or two. But at best these only provide marginal relief that is very short lived. Nothing else I've tried including journaling and meditation has helped. I'm starting to worry that I may haves some neurological condition. I stopped seeing doctors years ago because they couldn't find anything physically wrong and the treatments they suggested just made things worse. I couldn't trust them anymore. I don't know what I'm seeking with this post. Maybe suggestions, maybe empathy, maybe reassurance. Whatever thoughts come to you are welcome. I'm just frustrated and feeling hopeless.