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Day 18 most prevalent emotions in dairy entries

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by Edward, Oct 3, 2013.

  1. Edward

    Edward Peer Supporter

    ok well i haven't really kept a proper log of my dairy. I tend to write my entries on random scrap paper or old exercise books, so I will have to go from memory. I have definitely experienced sadness and anger (less so then sadness) due to the way I was treated as a kid (family members as well as typical kid stuff such as bullying etc). There were even things that I had nearly forgotten that had caused hurt from the most unlikely people. Entries about my present self mostly talk about my fear of not being good enough, always being wrong and I guess just a general realization that there is a lack of self love. I feel my (challenging as F#@CK) music course which I am currently doing/ breaking up with my g.f ( a year ago) has helped me to expose my lack of self love. I find that when my life looses its challenges I tend to care about myself a little less and up being more the person I used to be.
     
  2. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Edward. I was just surfing the forums and found your posting. You don't have to do any "book" journaling, whatever works for you,
    and scraps of paper are fine, but maybe keep them in a folder or file.

    Your childhood feelings of being bullied or just not appreciated have probably stuck with you, as mine have with me. I loved my father and know he loved me, but he had the bad habit of putting me down in front of his drinking buddies. I never knew why. Years later, although I never mentioned it, we had a better understanding and appreciation of each other (I think).

    You're in a challenging music course and also still recovering from breaking up with your girlfriend, so you're feeling less good about yourself. That's to be expected. Try to lighten up on yourself and like yourself more. I like you and I don't even know you, just reading your posting. And I get a kick out of you calling your journaling your "dairy" when you mean "diary." I'm a writer so I know the difference.

    I used to have a roommate who often stood at our kitchen counter and wrote his name, dozens of times. I didn't think he did that to remind himself what his name was, but it had something to do with identifying himself as a success. His father was a wealthy businessman and he may not have felt he was going to be anywhere as successful. He didn't need to be. He just needed to be himself.
     
  3. Edward

    Edward Peer Supporter

    lmao! at school they always taught us to notice the difference between dairy and diary, its one of those words a. Cheers for your words and yep I am learning to show a little more love regardless of my accomplishments. Learning to give myself recognition as I am. Like sometimes i will give myself a hard time saying stuff like you just do what you do to look cool and so others think your cool. But at the end of the day i just register those voices as myself being my own worse enemy and when I figure that out I can usually give myself comfort. Your a writer a? Fiction?
     

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