@Filipe2025.
You’re describing real pain, and many of the things you mention — aging, change, uncertainty, inequality, technology, social shifts, and feeling that the world is moving in a direction you don’t recognise — can genuinely be difficult to process.
At the same time, there is a difference between acknowledging painful realities and allowing those realities to become a worldview that guarantees more suffering.
Rage can feel like a natural response when we feel that something important has been lost or taken away. It can give us energy, certainty, and a sense of purpose. But it can also become a trap if it turns into the main lens through which we experience life.
TMS work is not about pretending that everything is fine or denying difficult emotions. It is about learning that emotions can be felt without allowing them to completely define who we are, what we focus on, or how we relate to the world.
Sometimes anger directed at large external forces — society, governments, technology, cultural change, other groups of people — can also be carrying deeper and more personal emotions underneath: grief for what has been lost, fear of becoming irrelevant, loneliness, regret, disappointment, or anxiety about the future. Those feelings are painful, but they are also feelings we can actually work with.
Remaining locked in resentment toward “the way things are” may provide temporary relief, because anger can feel more powerful than sadness or fear. But it can also keep us trapped in a constant state of threat, replaying the same thoughts without moving toward peace, acceptance, or change.
A big part of this work is recognising when we are living too much in the past — comparing today with how things used to be — or too much in the imagined future, predicting how everything will get worse. Neither place is somewhere we can actually act. The only place where we have any influence is the present moment.
That does not mean ignoring problems. It means asking: “What can I do with the life I actually have today?”
When rage appears, it can help to pause and notice it rather than immediately feeding it with a list of grievances or targets.
Ask yourself:
“What am I feeling underneath this anger?”
“What am I afraid of?”
“What am I grieving?”
The goal is not necessarily to fix those feelings immediately. Often, simply acknowledging them allows them to move through rather than becoming another reason to continue the cycle.
Then bring your attention back to what is happening right now. Notice what is still okay, even if life is imperfect: a comfortable home, a conversation with someone, a cup of coffee, a walk outside, a moment of calm, a small pleasure. These things do not cancel out suffering, but they stop suffering from becoming the only thing we see.
Try to choose one small action each day that moves you toward connection, curiosity, or meaning rather than deeper into resentment and isolation.
The belief that “we are unhappy by nature” may feel true, but it is not the only possible way to understand human life. Many people experience loss, aging, disappointment, and uncertainty, yet still find moments of enjoyment, connection, and gratitude. Often the difference is not that their lives are easier; it is that they have learned not to let suffering become their entire identity.
There is also a social cost to living permanently in outrage. Expressing anger can bring short-term relief, especially when others agree with us, but repeatedly returning to the same frustrations can create a cycle where the anger needs constant reinforcement. Over time, relationships can become centred around shared negativity rather than shared experience.
The people we are usually drawn toward are not necessarily people who think everything is wonderful. They are people who can acknowledge what is difficult while still having room for humour, warmth, curiosity, appreciation, and enjoyment.
The aim is not to stop caring about the world or to suppress anger when something genuinely matters. The aim is to stop allowing rage to consume the rest of life.
Your pain may be real. Your concerns may contain truth. But you still get to choose whether those things become a prison or whether they become part of a fuller, more balanced way of living.
, but I like to share my thoughts. Such as this question."Do hermist get TMS?"