I'm back on the programme having taken some time off. My symptoms were much reduced, so I never finished up (I started about 18 months ago). Lately I've been doing the work again as my symptoms were coming back. Today's video with Andrew Miller resulted in a breakthrough for me. I realised why I haven't been seeking treatment with a TMS specialist therapist. I told myself that I would do the programme, and then see if I needed it. I told myself that it was too expensive. I told myself that my nearest therapist was too far away. I told myself that I didn't want to explain my appointment to my husband. Today, in a flash, I realised why I haven't sought treatment: I don't feel my story is bad enough for it. How messed up is that? It's not that my pain isn't bad enough - it certainly has been (Although at present, since I'm doing the work it is much reduced). It is that I think, compared to others, my childhood was idyllic. Sure it wasn't PERFECT, but it was pretty damn close. Honestly, if I describe it, it sounds pretty lovely. So it's like I feel that I'm not worthy of treatment because I have never suffered any great trauma. But what I have realised is that, though my childhood was, ostensibly, pretty perfect, it clearly wasn't perfect for me. Somehow I have ended up here, with TMS, so somewhere along the line I didn't get what I needed, or got too much of something I didn't need (probably pressure to be successful). So all that matters is that my childhood was bad enough to give me TMS, however nice it was compared with other people's. Other people's experiences have no bearing on my own. It was enough to bring this on, therefore it is 'enough' to seek help. Can anyone else relate to this? Thinking you're not worthy of treatment because nothing that bad has ever happened to you?