I knew when we moved to a city where some of my siblings live that there would be some sparks eventually and alas…it has come to pass. Today, my sister started down one of her usual judgmental diatribes about something and I called her on it inside of holding my peace. Told her I felt judged. She denied it. "I don't judge you," she said. And then in the next breath said I was closed minded. (Isn't that a judgement?) I realized a couple of things. If a person doesn't understand French, shouting it to them isn't going to help them understand it any better. I see in myself that tendency only I'm not speaking a foreign language. I'm trying to get someone to understand…when they aren't looking to understand. The judgement seat is just too comfortable. I can still feel the tension in my body, 30 minutes after her departure. (Yay for increasing awareness of stress and physical symptoms!) It's unlikely my sister is going to change. This is the same sort of sh*t that went on when we were kids. And while I hope to continue to grow and become a better person, I think that is best done with firm boundaries around that relationship. I'm going to listen to an encouraging audiobooks on a walk. The physical exercise will help me shake this off. I also think I need to adopt a "polite stranger" stance on this relationship. There's not a thing I do that she doesn't disapprove and life is too short to stand in that line of fire. What do you do with difficult family relations?