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Is This The Way ??

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by RikR, Feb 17, 2013.

  1. RikR

    RikR Well known member

    Children are emotional sponges – they do not have the cortex (rational brain) to reason what is happening and work from basic drives and emotional reactions.
    Emotions are not amorphous things, they are electrical and biochemical impulses (peptides) that reach every cell in the body. A child's limited ability to process strong or painful emotions sends these reactions throughout the body and are encoded into the memory areas the brain we have limited access to.....not like a memory of what Christmas was like.
    It appears that we have self-limiting defense systems that turn our awareness off to these negative surges of energy. Because thoughts can alter reality (Mommy hits me but I know she still loves me) they can obscure our body wide awareness to emotions.

    However the body can only accommodate so much unacknowledged negative energy so we develop internal defensive parts to further shield us.
    For me I was not aware that emotions are connections to my inner truth and True Self and my thoughts are just things my mind plays with...often twisted, distorted and designed to keep me distracted.
    So now by careful computation I discovered I have 335,995,698 lifetime powerful emotions that I overrode with my mind that never were honored or acknowledged. I also suspect they are in the same room my little boy lives in and he is being fried with all the painful energy these powerful stored emotions create.
    When I turned off my emotional “Ear” I also cut the phone lines to my boy’s room. It appears his only communication are “symptoms” in the body and mind...at least for me. My willful nature forged ahead while storms were brewing...still I could not hear!

    My next wrong road was relying on my medical and psychology education to fix the symptoms, then came drawers of potions and shelves of books. Treatments of every kind and total hopelessness from all the failures. More input, more techniques, more programs for healing and more “shoulds” ...my inner child is sick of the parental “shoulds.”
    Still my child is silenced. The more I have sought time in solitude and silence the more I think I hear a faint voice...no several voices....my inner child – my spirit and inner wisdom!
    I think my child wants me to clean his emotional room, take his hand and go build a sand castle and watch while the tide comes in!!
    Now "is" my challenge to turn off all the outside voices, stop looking at the thousand fingers pointing other directions and go inside to really listen. Frightening stuff this!!
    Forest likes this.
  2. Pandamonium

    Pandamonium Well known member

    Wow RikR, what an amazing and insightful post, I agree with everything you have written and know, by reading this, that you are on the right path. I only wish I had a 10th of your eloquence.
    Good luck with your TMS journey, and give that little boy a massive hug, he is finally going to be heard.
  3. RikR

    RikR Well known member

    Thanks Panda...thanks!!
  4. Forest

    Forest Beloved Grand Eagle

    This is a great post! It reminded me of part of Pathways of Pain Relief, where Eric Sherman writes
    All children are self-focused....So when a parent drinks alcoholically, the child can only conclude, it must be his fault; he did something wrong to make mommy or daddy act that way.....Because of these cognitive limitations, children cannot be reflective about their own parents' behavior and motives, even as it specifically relates to them. No child, no matter how bright, precocious, or sensitive, could ever conceive of the notion that mommy regards me as a parasite because of her own problems. A child's understanding of the causality of events is always self-referential.

    When we experience trauma as children, we do not have the cognitive development to fully understand what is going on. There is where a lot of the TMS personality is developed. We think that if we are perfect and good our parents won't drink or won't get divorced. If we are perfect our parents won't reject us, which is the biggest fear for a child.

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