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Is crying emotional expression or repression?

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Misha, Jan 7, 2016.

  1. Misha

    Misha Peer Supporter

    Is crying emotional expression or repression (or neither)?

    I've always been someone who is 'quick to tears' and my reaction to most negative emotions is to feel like crying (which perhaps clouds the real emotion?). Obviously in public I stop myself from crying but in private do cry, which to me feels like I do get the emotions 'out'. Is this really the case?

    Just something I have been wondering about as I try to learn how to properly process emotions rather than repressing them.

    Thanks :)
     
  2. Bex

    Bex Newcomer

    Crying is emotional expression. We all have occasions where stressful feelings well up inside until eventually the bubble bursts and its like opening the flood gates. Anyone that has spent any time in tears in a psychotherapy session will often have feelings of relief, physical exhaustion, mental exhaustion afterwards. That said, not everyone deals with things in the same way and how and when you express emotions is very individual.
     
  3. Misha

    Misha Peer Supporter

    Then I should be cured of TMS already, haha!
     
  4. Bex

    Bex Newcomer

    I wish it was that easy, I sometimes think rocket science would be simpler :banghead:
     
  5. Susan1111

    Susan1111 Well known member

    Hi Sara I'm also someone who cries. I can read a story or see a movie that touches me in some way... crying in a therapy session certainly not unusual. The question is what else brings me to tears? I do believe for me although sometimes cathartic many times I'm crying because I'm feeling hurt or the little girl inside of me is hurt and she is not being heard and doesn't know how to be heard so crying has become her way. So yes for me I will say that my crying dependent on circumstances is a form of repression. Instead of expressing how I feel I cry.

    So my question to you is when do you cry what feelings are you having? Stand back from yourself and think about the circumstances that bring you to tears...by doing so perhaps you will get closer to your answer.
     
    Misha, SophieM and IrishSceptic like this.
  6. Aurora

    Aurora Peer Supporter

    Crying is definitely an expression of emotion however women tend to mask anger with feelings of sadness. While you are sad you might also be angry. I know this is something I've recently learned about myself.
     
  7. Misha

    Misha Peer Supporter

    Thanks for your reply. That's an important question. I suppose I'm not really crying about a particular incident but about that the incident made me feel unheard, or inferior or defeated. I'll keep thinking about that one :)
     
  8. Misha

    Misha Peer Supporter

    Hi Aurora,
    I think that is definitely true but this is confusing to me because I actively feel angry as well as sad. In fact, it's something I've been thinking about a lot because if the basis of TMS is having repressed anger and not being aware of it, then why did my symptoms start at a time when I was suddenly already feeling very consciously angry about a lot issues that were going on within our family? After much exploration, I really can't seem to come up with other issues I could be subconsciously angry about. I feel like I'm aware of my anger yet I still have pain!
     
  9. Aurora

    Aurora Peer Supporter

    Hi Sara,
    I'm still learning all these things myself. I find myself going through the same thing. When I described the body sensations I feel when I'm angry my TMS therapist said that it sounded more like anxiety than anger. I can definitely see that. I'll be angry at my husband but scared at the same time that I'll get too angry and then I'll start feeling sad as well because sadness is more acceptable. Then I complain to myself and my friends about my husband but this isn't the same as feeling your anger. As I understand it, you're supposed to place your attention on your body when you feel angry and not the thoughts and try to accept the physical sensations. This is described better in a few TMS books such as Chronic Pain: Your Key to Recovery.
     
  10. Susan1111

    Susan1111 Well known member

    My therapist told me I didn't know how to be angry! I think I'm too busy feeling hurt and sad. I so understand what you're saying.
     

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