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If you cant change a situation you can change your attitude toward it

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Eric "Herbie" Watson, Mar 12, 2014.

  1. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    When we have tough situations that we have to face day in and day out. We often wonder how will I ever get past feeling like I'm a victim of circumstance.

    Yes we all have had those tight situations that make us wonder how are we supposed to heal when all of this is going on?

    There is a key note in the question above. The how question? I believe that question limits a lot of people in their quest to heal from tms.

    If you want to get better and your in unprofitable situations. The golden question is to ask why? Why am I reacting to this circumstance like this? See when we can understand why -- then we can learn to change why were re-acting. Example -- Mr. Johnson your boss of 25 years has been giving you a hard time for about a year now at your job. You can't understand why he seems to have it out for you but you decide to stay at your job because times are hard and plus you love what you do.

    Ok, now if I was to ask you how is all of this happening? Then you would only come to the conclusion that he is how this is happening, right? If I was to ask why this is happening then you would say , well he's a jerk ok. Then I'd say why is he a jerk and you might say cause he makes me feel agitated. Then I'd say why does he make you feel agitated and at this point you'd either have the answer or you'd say I'm not sure.

    If you keep asking the why question then eventually the thoughts will land right back on your re-actions. The very first re-action you have when you get mad at your boss. When you can remember or think of or become aware when this emotion is triggered then you can learn to re-condition this trigger by floating through this time of anger or distress instead of reacting to this emotion that swells up inside you.

    Of course you will be sensitized and have to break the conditioning but the why question. Will get you through a lot if you pay special attention to why you are reacting in this manner. Then you can start to focus on this emotion and then process it and eventually let it go on your journey to freedom.
     
    North Star and Msunn like this.
  2. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Herbie, a good subject for discussion. Asking ourselves the WHY question can lead us to better understanding
    ourselves, others, and the situations.

    I've become interested in putting myself in the other's shoes to learn why someone else bugs me, or
    has given me anxiety or worry ever since my childhood.

    I've come to learn that those who bug me nor or did back in my childhood may themselves have TMS
    and they take it out on whoever is near them or in the case of a boss, he or she may take it out on someone
    working under them.

    In any case, asking the why question is really important in healing. It leads to better understanding.
     
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  3. Eric "Herbie" Watson

    Eric "Herbie" Watson Beloved Grand Eagle

    Yes your so right Walt. The why question can be slippery at first when you ask the first why? But once you get passed that then its smooth selling. If we can get into self in which we are relaxed and patient -- non- critical or judgmental. Then we can ask these why questions under meditation.

    If we still feel anxiety at this time then we are still not in self, self as in parts therapy self is never angered or critical or up-set. Always at ease and in a pace of harmonious states to say the least. When were in self under meditation we can just about ask anything and get the correct answer from our own mind reservoir of knowledge.

    Most don't know how powerful their knowledge truly is until they tap into this self part. Its also the part we call the intuition or the gut. Some call this part the all knowing one.

    I just like to know that when I have a question I can get relaxed and then enter into a state of self and from their when I ask why? I always get straight up answers that help me move forth with my agendas.

    I do want to add that the why question when your not even in self will still often produce amazing results.

    Bless you
     
  4. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Asking ourselves why can be so important in healing our pain. We get to the root of the cause that way,
    then usually it's just a matter of easing up on ourselves, forgiving, and letting go. On with the good feelings!
     

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