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i sometimes feel like reading stuff from other people in forums could make things worst

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by stevow7, Oct 28, 2019.

  1. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    this is a really helpful forum like a lot out there, but sometimes i see post that could actually make me second guess stuff and overthink stuff making things worst. I’m guessing tms wants me to ask a lot in forums and read a lot so i overthink stuff?

    anyone experience this?
    Goldy likes this.
  2. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    I think it totally depends on how much you know yourself, and how much you trust yourself. Without those two things, you will continue to look for confirmation and reassurance from others, and this is how you you will spend your life: constantly second-guessing, overthinking, and changing your mind - always under the influence of the latest thing you read or that you were told in your search for the perfect answer. This is perfectionism at its worst and most disabling.

    TMS healing can only come from a strong belief in who you are, and an ability to accept what is, rather than living in search of some unattainable future.
    tgirl and stevow7 like this.
  3. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    i deleted previous reply because i re read your post and understood the second time i read it.

    i asked about something you said that i didn’t understood, but now i get it.

    i just wanted to say that i’m constantly asking for example, “did someone felt this or that” and “how did you fix this or that” in other forums. i also ask here a lot. i guess i need to stop and ask myself “should i really post and or look for more info about this?”.

    thanks a lot for replying!
    JanAtheCPA likes this.
  4. Goldy

    Goldy Peer Supporter

    I happen to agree with you about this. I won't join and read support groups. I don't think it's helpful or healthy to listen to symptoms. In my case, I have to be very careful because I'm highly suggestible.
  5. Boston Redsox

    Boston Redsox Well Known Member

  6. Ryan

    Ryan Well known member

    That is true you can be highly suggestable in a good way. Shut the lies up and focus on truth.

    Goldy likes this.
  7. Orion2012

    Orion2012 Well known member

    No one "makes" you second guess. Everything is a choice. You control your thoughts.
    Goldy likes this.
  8. miffybunny

    miffybunny Beloved Grand Eagle

    That is absolutely true but when you are struggling and going through the process you don't need that negativity and toxicity of those types of groups because they can get in your head and subconscious. They can even trigger new questions and problems that weren't there earlier. I'm secure enough at this point that I can go on one of those sights with enough detachment that it won't affect me but number one: why would I want to lol? and number 2: It would have affected me earlier in the process and things often did.... even scientific things about the brain was dicey because I would form images and false beliefs in my head. No one has power over your mind unless you give it to them but at the same time why expose yourself to that...hope that makes sense...
  9. Goldy

    Goldy Peer Supporter

    I totally agree with that. I'm not at the stage where I'm strong enough to go on the symptom forums, but why would I in the first place. I'm at the stage where I'm not freaking out and paying attention to the symptoms, but I'm also very suggestive and don't want new symptoms or negativity.
  10. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    sorry for my english, but could you explain better? you said you won't join and read support groups, but this is a support forum that it's also considered a support group?

    thanks for replying!
  11. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    agree with what exactly?
  12. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    thanks a lot for replying!
  13. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member


    thanks a lot for replying
  14. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    well he/she still is correct. you decide if you want to second guess stuff. i understood some parts of your post, but i wasn't clearly enough after your first sentence. do you mind explaining it better? sorry for my english. No one has power over your mind unless you give it to them but at the same time why expose yourself to that...hope that makes sense... i understood this tho.

    thanks a lot for replying!
  15. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    thanks a lot for replying!
    Goldy likes this.
  16. miffybunny

    miffybunny Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi! Yes let me clarify. So this is a TMS support group/community with the objective of healing and getting better....as opposed to most support groups of medical conditions (there are a million..."Fibromyalgia Warriors" etc etc etc) where the groups are intended to help "manage" or "cope" with symptoms. What usually happens in these types of "support groups" is that they become repositories of misery and swapping horror stories. Instead of hearing how people got better, these groups tend to reinforce and wallow in the symptoms as well as pathologize and label people. The medical condition then becomes the whole person's identity. Not only that, but they create more fear and depression for the person who joins. You have to be careful of groups because they are composed by individuals ....with unique circumstances and stories. The danger lies when we start to compare ourselves and question ourselves based on the opinions of others. Another thing I experienced when I was in the process, was I would read new information...on the brain or scientific types of articles but they could also produce a lot of fear and images in my head that were not necessarily truth or reality or applicable to me. No one has power over my mind unless I willingly give them that power (like in the case of cults) BUT I also choose not read gloom and doom on the internet or associate with defeatist, victim mindset people. That's a choice on my part. I hope I clarified!
    Goldy, tgirl and ssxl4000 like this.
  17. Goldy

    Goldy Peer Supporter

    Well said!

    I've heard that talking about your symptoms reinforces your symptoms. We know they are there and that they are causing issues, but the symptoms are coming from our brain; not our bodies.

    I think it's more constructive to talk about what you did today to live and not dwell on a symptom. You are giving the symptom more life and power when you talk about it.

    For two years, I talked about my symptoms to doctors, to physical therapists, alternative therapists and anyone who listened. It kept me in symptom mode and not one of those people helped me!

    Support groups are great if you are talking about what methods help, but when I go on any support group, I avoid anything that open with their symptoms. I'm still learning about all this. I read, I go on tmswiki and ask questions and work on their program and other programs, meditate and most of all, live my life the way I want to!
    miffybunny likes this.
  18. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    yup you did clarify! thanks!
  19. stevow7

    stevow7 Well known member

    thanks a lot for replying!
    Goldy and miffybunny like this.

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