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I need to pack to move!

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by Miss Metta, Apr 11, 2017.

  1. Miss Metta

    Miss Metta Peer Supporter

    There is no doubt that I am feeling very angry, resentful and overwhelmed by the fact that I have to pack up and move house again, the 4th move for me in 2 years. I crave stability and I have zilch.

    The last few weeks I've had trouble with shoulder and elbow issues when trying to do overhead presses and bench presses. Indeed I have not ever had a time when this was not an issue, so I cannot say that this is suddenly new. It's an ongoing issue for me. It would have flared up anyway, I believe,, because it always does, but the timing also happens to be now. So I engaged the services of a physio/trainer whom I like very much and she's given me some rehab exercises to do and also assisting me with my form. But I love lifting and it's important to me to try all avenues to get well. I've never done this before, engaged a physio/coach, I've always just quit weights in despair. When she puts my shoulders and scapula in the 'correct' position, the pain goes away and I can lift. Apparently my form is way off and so this is causing continual trauma to the muscles and tendons involved. Supposedly. That's the physio theory. In addition to this issue, I pulled my lat, my thoracic spine is stiff and sore and hurts when I move and hurts when I extend arms. She thinks it's related to the lat pull (which is settling down), but my entire left side of my upper body keeps giving out. Now, this morning, my tricep has pulled. I wonder whether it's from the shoulder weight work I did with her yesterday, but tending now to think that with this quadrella of 'injuries' cropping up, it's probably a TMS snow job and its over-played it's hand.

    Anyway, as I said in my intro, I'm moving house and I should have started packing weeks ago. But I've been completely unmotivated - despondent about the whole thing, really, and the enormity of the job and how the bulk of it falls on me to do, even though the move is not of my own volition but because of my husband's work. Instead, I've been painting. I even made a humouress post on Facebook about how normally it's hard to get motivated to paint - as it is for most artists - but the idea of packing and moving has me rushing to the easel with grace, ease and ....procrastination. I am actually pleased with what I've achieved, in this regard...I haven't been so productive at the easel for ages! But that still leaves the issue of packing all my crap...

    So this afternoon I've pulled out a few boxes and packed 2 tiny ones, and the tricep is hurting like hell every time I try and pick something up, as is my back and I've got an entire flippin' house to do! So I just quit.

    I know I cannot avoid this forever, that I have to get going on this. I am so stuck emotionally and physically. Over the last few weeks I've told myself I'll get going when the arm/shoulder/back pain settles a bit, but it does seem that just when one muscle is recovering, the others on my left side are locking up. Somehow the idea of trying to 'pack through the pain' and ignore it doesn't seem like it's going to work, probably because I am so resistant to this move anyway, packing is one of my most detested activities, and I suspect may make it worse rather than better.

    How do I work through this? I am hoping that just by writing this down publicy, something might 'click' for me, but so far, no. I do feel quite guilty for the degree of anger and resentment I have at this having to move again and how childish I am being about it all.(Normally I'm not a huge procrastinator). Yeah, I'm furious and very anxious. All ideas and thoughts welcome,
    Miss Metta

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