I cannot handle this anymore... please help (random midback pain)

[Shiroishi]

I have been experiencing groin pain (penis, urethra, scrotum, etc.) since February. I have undergone every form of imaging & testing (Pelvic MRI, ultrasound, urinalysis, bloodwork) with nearly unremarkable results (only mild inflammation of L5).


I have undergone 8 sessions of Pelvic Floor Physical Therapy, and noticed a reduction in my aforementioned symptoms, and am scheduled for 8 more sessions this September. However, about a few weeks ago, while I was asleep, I started having mid-back (thoracic area; possibly lower) spasms, and sharp pains that woke me up randomly at 3.AM., in the morning which set me into panic mode. Ever since then, especially while lying down, or while seated with my back up against a backrest, the spasms (feels like muscle movement along the spine) occur.


I am now very nervous because as I was reading Dr. Sarnos book, he mentioned that the majority of back pain is at the lower back. My spasms occur slightly above that, if not at the start of the thoracic area (I think). Now I am getting doubts that I don't have TMS, that I have a spine issue, even though I am only 26 years old, 120 pounds, and healthy. I have intense stress over this, I cannot sleep, or do anything, and I feel like my life is ruined. I am writing to you all today as a last call before I give up completely.

 

[Mike46]

I am sorry you are going through this pain. I've had a similar pains and I've been able to overcome them mainly following the Sarnos protocol however there is more to it in my opinion. You can read my posts from 5 years ago when I was just like you. It sounds like you are worried that because your back pain is a little higher up than the majority of back pain sufferers that Sarnos mentioned you don't think you have TMS. This is not true, Sarnos said that the pain can be anywhere in the body. I myself never really get back pain but I'm certain now that I am prone to psychosomatic pain. The pain can be anywhere!

In my opinion, TMS is a stress induced phenomenon. This stress can come from daily life, work, family, politics, society etc. and a big part of it comes from trauma. And when the pain comes you are now going to be more stressed out which causes more pain. This part is kinda like a revolving trap that makes TMS so hard to get out of. It was for me as it took a few years to figure it out but I'm thankful to have it behind me now.

Here are a few tips that, looking back, helped me the most.

First, in my opinion, people with TMS have either a lot of stress in their life or their ability to manage stress is diminished. They probably don't even realize they are stressed out at the time. I didn't. If I were you, I'd look at all the stressors in your life and figure out how to decrease them if only a little here and there. This includes stress from work, family, politics, society etc. Also, look at how trauma has impacted you. A lot of our stress inducing personality traits come from trauma and there are many trauma gurus that can help you with that.

Another good place to start is by convincing yourself that your pain is TMS and not a condition or disease. This will help in getting you out of the stress pain loop trap. A few things that help convince me is when I read Sarnos' Healing Back Pain where he outlined certain personality traits that people who get TMS tend to have, and I basically had them all. I also started to watch the pain (without fear) and noticed how it correlated to stressful situations. You can also try this experiment by Googling all of your symptoms and seeing all of the possible conditions and diseases that it could be. Did your pain get worse with worry? I then stopped my pelvic floor therapy. I slowly started working out again. I decreased my workload. Starting taking vacations again. Learned how my personality traits caused internal stress. For the last 2 years I've been learning more and more about trauma, which in my opinion is a major part of my pain and other issues.

Altogether, know that this is a treatable condition but not with medicine. you're going to have to use your mind. Hope this helps.

 

[JanAtheCPA]

Hello @Shiroishi and welcome to the forum. Thank you for the good introduction, which wasn't too long, explained your physical symptoms, described how you've been thoroughly checked out by medical professionals, and also described your reasons for thinking this might be psychologically based, or what we still call TMS in honor of Dr Sarno.

As far as I'm concerned, the response you received from @Mike46 is absolutely perfect. Please read it more than once. Perhaps print it out and read it at least once a day!

Remember that Dr Sarno's first book was written in the 1980s. That's 4 decades ago!
Neuroscience and the understanding of the pain and stress connection have come a long way since then, and even his own ideas changed by the time he wrote his last book in 2006 - which was almost 20 years ago.

In addition to the great advice from Mike, here are a couple of easy self tests that we are recommending:

The first is a self-assessment test from the PPD Association (the professional group of mindbody/TMS doctors, therapists and other practitioners): https://ppdassociation.org/ppd-self-questionnaire (Self Quiz — Psychophysiologic Disorders Association) (Self Quiz — Psychophysiologic Disorders Association)

The second is a forum thread with a link and description of the "ACEs Quiz" and its relevance to physical suffering:
https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/aces-quiz-online-printable-versions.27061 (ACEs "quiz" - online & printable versions) (ACEs "quiz" - online & printable versions) (ACEs "quiz" - online & printable versions)

You might want to check out our Structured Educational Program on the main tmswiki.org site here: https://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/Structured_Educational_Program (Structured Educational Program)
It is free and does not require any kind of registration.

 

[Bonnard]

Hello @Shiroishi ,

Thanks--welcome to the forum!! A few things stood out in your post.
Getting checked out medically was one of the strongest recommendations by Dr. Sarno. You've got that behind you and it seems like they did all sorts of testing and didn't find much (only some minor inflammation). There are some excellent suggestions in the posts above about confirming for yourself that what you're dealing with is TMS.

Continuing with physical therapy could be something you think about--whether it's really going to help you in the long-term. You mention having that series of sessions scheduled for next month. Having that to look forward to tells your brain that there's something wrong physically that needs to be worked on, and you've got that work scheduled in September. It's an easy trap to keep the TMS symptoms going.
If you're dealing with TMS (and it sure seems like you are), then physical therapy isn't going to get you the results you need.

TMS symptoms can show up anywhere. Mid-back versus low-back is one difference. But, there are folks on this forum with all sorts of symptoms. Dr. Sarno called it "the many faces of TMS" in his first book, Mind over Back Pain. As Jan mentions, this book was written 4 decades ago. Even though back pain was the primary focus of the book, he was already in touch with the fact that symptoms can show up in a wide variety of ways.

I wish you well!

 

[Diana-M]

I am writing to you all today as a last call before I give up completely.

Don’t give up! The forum is filled with people who have healed. It takes time and a lot of work. But what choice do you have?