How do you take control?

[Wrighty23]

Hi All,

I'm new to this forum having just finished reading 'Healing Back Pain' by Dr Sarno.

I'm finding all of this TMS stuff very interesting and my personality fits pretty well.

The question I have is how are you guys taking control of the pain? how do you know what or where to find your repressed emotions? can they just be minor things?. Or do you have success from just an awareness that the pain is not physical?

I understand that most people go through emotional trauma or have repressed anger on anxiety for one reason or another but other than having a bit of stress at work i can't really think of what could be giving me the problem. I had a very happy childhood for example (that is I think, unless I have something so dark and disturbing that I have no recollection at all). Do you need to go searching for these feelings?

Any help would be greatly appreciated.

 

[Ryan]

Just give it time, I suggest you do the SEP on the site. It will help you try to find those repressed emotions. I suggest you also read "Great Pain Deception" by Steve Ozanich, just take your time reading it. It goes into more details than healing back pain. Try not to look to hard to find what's bothering you, just give it time and be aware of your emotions each day. I tried so hard in the beginning to find what is wrong with me but as time went it started to come together. Just be aware of how your symptoms increase and decrease. Wish you the best of luck and don't give up. Be patient and take your time.

Ryan

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Hi, Wrighty. Healing from pain caused by TMS comes different ways for different people. Some lucky ones heal just by believing the pain is psychological and not structural. Others need to do what is called "journaling," writing down thoughts about our past and present lives, from childhood to the present.
Others heal from recognizing their personality traits such as being a perfectionist or a "goodist," someone who wants everyone to approve of and like them all the time.

You may fall into one or more of these categories.

You may think you had a happy childhood, but a little journaling may reveal things you have repressed since then. Don't spend more than 20 minutes a day journaling or it could be upsetting. Spend most of your time not thinking about your pain, go about your normal activities, and put as much fun in each day as you can.

 

[hecate105]

Step 1 is the realisation that the pain is not physical in origin. Sometimes this is enough for people - and their pain goes. Step 2 is to tell yourself that the pain is not physical, that it is due to repressed emotions and/or personality traits (perfectionism/goodism etc) and that you will not give it your attention any more - again sometimes that is enough to make the pain go. The pain is acting as a distraction - from your repressed stuff - or from your personality traits. If you still have pain you then need to take another step - look at any stress in your life. If you follow the Structured Educational Programme on the TMSwiki site - and I recommend it (I have!) it takes you through how/why to find out what has stressed you in the past and is stressing you now, it also describes and shows the different traits that can cause TMS (or make it worse or just enable it) Very often something has happened when we are small children - perhaps a parent left the family home or a parent or sibling died. Sometimes we might not view things that happened as stressful - because we HAVE repressed it! It really is worth going through the programme and seeing what comes out.
Personally I had known I was really upset that my parents had split when I was 4 years old, I could remember it clearly. But it wasn't until I went through the programme that I realised that it was leaving MY home that stressed me the most! I had just left one day - in my slippers and never gone back again. It had traumatised me as much as losing my father....
So you may find that things that have happened in your life (moving house, pets dying, losing friends etc) may have stressed you far more than you 'consciously' knew.
The exercises and videos and lists you do on the programme really do 'walk' you through your life in how you have reacted and behaved in stressful situations.
As you find out these things you can deal with them - in various ways. Many people find journaling really beneficial (I hated it at first but it did me a world of good!) Also meditation (giving your nmind mind space to breathe) and mindfulness.
Good luck in finding out about yourself...