Here for some support. I feel like I’ve been making good progress recently and have hit 2 setbacks. I need someone here to tell me I’ll be okay. So my fear was at an all time high, and conditioned responses happening after running, quite frightening, but I kept going on. They would resolve after a day or so, and I would notice that the severity was not consistent, especially when I would ask myself, kindly ‘what’s going on sweetie?’ As running. That’s progress right? Then I decided to start seeing the pain psychology center people because I just could.not.believe that I had TMS. It’s just so hard for me to believe this whole conditioned response as TMS. The Back pain I had in 2017? Easy. The ‘when I do this then this happens which is also correlated with those MRIs’ hard, but I kept running. And I think I start improving because my fear is haywire. Well, the first setback. Out of nowhere my tooth starts hurting. Really badly. Spreads down my jaw. I pray for it and realize somewhere down the prayer that it wasn’t healing I needed. Turned out my gum was overgrowing on top of my tooth and I needed an operculectomy. So I go in and have the extra gum cut off in a minor surgery. But TMS me is thinking ‘why now, of all times is extra gum growing over my teeth??’ next thing. Just when the tooth is resolving, I’m running last Monday. As I run I roll my left ankle inwards. When that happened my first thought when I got home was ‘Yay, now I don’t have to push myself to ‘have’ to run 3 times a week to combat this TMS thing’ I found that odd. I mean I did like the endorphins from running- those days are less miserable. But I didn’t realize inner me was relieved. Anyway, last night I realize okay, it’s been a week since I was running. My foot feels better. The inside of my ankle less tender. We could do walking or better yet, the elliptical in the morning. so I look at a couple websites and decide, okay, great, I’ll do the elliptical. I’ve missed working out. I feel M.I.S.E.R.A.B.L.E sitting all day, jobless, trying to ignore my difficult mother and unwell sister, trying to stay above ground, digging up emotions that have no safety net to carry them. I digress. so I’m walking downstairs,( just when my left foot is improving) and then I start thinking about pain. Like pain in general. This TMS thing, if my knees are safe, just pain in general. I’m going down the stairs thinking about this then I think ‘I think I need to journal about this pain experience for me. Maybe it’ll make me feel bett-’ when Wham! my right foot suddenly gives out under me (honestly just Gives out) and the side of my foot slams into the concrete staircase. It’s throbbing. So painful. I curse. I finally get to the bottom of the staircase and start praying, my heart racing. so now, for the third week in a row, I am experiencing some kind of actual physical injury. What the HELL is going on?? Has this happened to anybody?? My thoughts are crazy of course. I am yet to overcome this ‘are my knee joints weak why do I hurt after exercise’ ‘no it’s TMS I’m fine’ ‘but they KEEP hurting’ ‘you’re okay’ blah blah blah, and now my head is spinning with worrying- is this going to be a new problem? What if my mind latches onto my right ankle (which has NEVER given me issues) or my left inner ankle (which also has NEVER given me issues)? I haven’t yet beat my knees, what if this becomes another problem?? And how will I know I can start running again? This couch life is Not suiting me and I’m anxious to move. Words of wisdom anyone? And has this ever occurred? Or was I just unlucky? Why is my body literally failing on me? And I know you obviously don’t live in my body but can someone say anything about this fear that it will be a ‘new’ thing?