I need a quick pep talk whoever is available and willing. I can't seem to stop looking up my symptoms!!! Right now I am writing this instead. Gut and back pain. Sometimes severe but has gotten better gradually. It moves around and changes in intensity sometimes quickly shifting, other times lingers. I have been checked out to some degree by both alternative and conventional docs but have not had any testing like mri, ultrasound or the like, just blood tests and physical palpitations that turned up normal other than some thyroid and female hormonal swings. (I am 72) I REALLY do not want to have to go thru invasive procedures! In fact I prefer dying over being pulled into the conventional medical system. I have a white coat phobia to that extent. So I guess it's bc I haven't COMPLETELY ruled out something that could be serious that I remain concerned. And I've lost weight which could be either my anxiety about food and simply not eating enough. At one point on this journey I actually made progress. In fact I have given others pep talks on this site as I thought I had handled it already. But it's all back again. I keep telling myself the pain is only hypersensivity to gas and is TMS. I cant seem to totally convince my mind that digestive issues are TMS even tho I feel intuitively that I am fine and that this is occurring for me to examine my lack of emotional expression. I am the typical TMS personality type with childhood background and heavy feeling of responsibility for way too many things. I'm realizing a lot about myself and letting go constantly, but times like this... especially since I won't be going to a doc or hospital right now in the middle of this virus scare anyway...I am creating anxiety as a symptom imperative I feel sure. First I get angry and then I fall into tears in a pity party. I just want to KNOW! I realize I have to be 100% convinced that it is TMS but that is easier said than done. I need relief from the pain and anxiety as well as the overthinking! Stress dammit!