Hello, thank you for the welcome. I am so glad I found this community. I am going through the steps of the SEP and I've found it very helpful for managing my symptoms already.
I have most likely had TMS for several years now, but on a small enough scale that I didn't really think about it much. I had pain on and off for several years, but only this past year has it become quite bad for me. The main change that has happened is that this past year I became very fearful of my pain. I let it take over my life and snowball into something huge in my mind while in the past I would try to shake it off and ignore it. I have adopted the mentality that I am very frail and weak and diseased and it has become a self-fulfilling prophecy where I am scared to live my life.
I get pain mostly in my lower back and in my left knee. When my knee starts hurting, I become very fearful that I will be unable to walk. I live in NYC where a lot of walking is necessary. I have been to several doctors, chiropractors, massage therapists, physical therapists and an acupuncturist this past year trying to find some relief. I would usually get some placebo relief from each one, but it would not last long. I have no actual severe structural damage, at least not any that has shown on a lumbar MRI or x ray.
I have enough evidence in my mind to believe TMS is my problem, but I still have work to do to get it through my head and undo all my conditioning. One of my last remaining mental barriers is fear of rheumatoid arthritis, which I read Dr. Sarno say is one of the few actual medical back problems that is not TMS and this will not help. I intend to go to a rheumatologist to get tests done, although I'm fearful of that process.
Either way, arthritis or no, I definitely have issues with repressed emotions and psychological trauma which are only making things worse. But I am going to try my best to overcome this.
