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healed for 10+ years

Balto, I've just read your post and it's moved and inspired me. Thank you for sharing your wisdom and knowledge.

May you continue to live a joyous and happy life.
 
Man I just barely read your story and I want to say thank you. This testimonial you shared clicked with me better than any other article, post, book or forum I have read. You made a huge difference to me and my thinking about this. I know I will be cured now.
Thanks again Balto. God Bless you!
 
I just printed your story. I am feeling rather defeated at the moment but this is a really inspiring read and is such a good summary of the basics. Thank you!
 
Hi Balto

Thanks so much for sharing - especially your recommendation's on how to do it.

Yes - you HAVE inspired me to do it too ;o)


You said '' I'm not a very smart guy, I'm a college dropped out and I have failed at many things in life.''

This worries me ...

PLEASE STOP speaking/thinking/talking about yourself like this !!!

You ARE EVERYTHING you are meant to be !
Nothing more, nothing less, and PERFECT EXACTLY as you are...

and honestly I think you are amazing to of recovered from this damn tms - because
THAT is NOT easy (I know as I'm trying - its REALLY bloody HARD!!)

Best Wishes x x
 
Just want to add this:
Dr. Sarno make it very simple for us to heal, we somehow confuse ourselves by making it so complex. His method is very simple:
- Realize and understand that our symptoms were caused by negative emotions. (THE CAUSE)
- Accept his diagnosis. (100%)
- He said tms symptoms are benign, temporary. (what he mean is: DO NOT FEAR IT. )
- Continue to be as active as one normally be. (again: NO FEAR)
you see, it is very simple, Do not FEAR your symptoms. The symptoms are benign, temporary, reversible... what is there to fear?
The one single most important message that I think doctor Sarno want us to get is: DO NOT FEAR YOUR SYMPTOMS. If you can do that you will be cure.
 
Great story and certainly provides inspiration.

When making peace with the past how have people on this board gone about this? I try but it's not simple.
 
To me making peace with the past mean forgive, forget, then move on. Be compassionate. be forgiving to anyone and anything that have hurt you in the past. Tell yourself it is long gone, it is over, it is spilt milk, let move on and let live. Don't dwell in the past. Don't give it any weight. What is important is NOW. Not the future, not the past, NOW.
 
Thanks man,

You're right with forgive and forget. It's a waste of energy dwelling and being angry at the past and this creates tension with negative thinking.

Live the day in daylight components from morning till bedtime for me from now on.
 
balto said:
This is my first post here. Just joined last night. I am a member at tmshelp.com forum for a couple years and post frequently over there. I have know about this forum but just didn't have the time to spend at both places. Don't want to be redundant. I saw quite a few members belong to both forums, which is very nice, it kind of seeing your old friends in another town. :)
The following is my success story that I've posted at tmshelp.com, I hope this story will help trigger some healing power in some people here.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It take me a while to sit down and write this, My life right now is so full with love and happiness that I find it so hard to sit for long for fear of missing out on living life. :)

I hope by reading another healing story will help you in your journey to better health. Mind and Body.

First, I want to tell you a little about my background. Because I think it would help you understand better why I get tms/anxiety. I grown up in the war torned country of Vietnam. At 16 I escaped from Vietnam and spend almost a year in refugee camp in Malaysia and Phillipine and came to the US in 1981 alone, I was one of those boat people. I am now 50. I came from a lovely and wonderful family. Love my mom and very proud of my dad. Eight wonderful siblings and we got along very well. There is always love and laughter in our house, even the air raid and the bombing outside couldn't silent us for long. I would say my childhood is great and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I was always happy and always healthy, carefree and confidence.

My Mindbody syndrome started in the late 80's, I made a surprise visit to my long time girlfriend and caught her with another guy. My world turned up side down that day and nothing is the same since. All my tms/anxiety symptoms started soon after that. The sleepless night, the anger triggered stress I constantly feel, the loneliness that never leave... turn into anxiety and IBS. My head feel foggy all the time, I feel like a zomby, I just get up and go to work then drive home to spend the rest of the day all alone, everyday. Every where I go I have to know exactly where the closest bathroom is. I have to stand at the closest exit when I'm in any building, just incase my stomach is acting up. Probiotic, tumtum, and all kind of med my doctor gave me... rarely help. Xanax gave me a weird feeling so I stop taking it. Zoloft is not any better. So I just endure my anxiety and IBS. Long story short, here is the list of symptoms I had suffered from for almost 20 years:
- Anxiety & panic attack, agoraphobia, ptsd, depression, suicidal, headache, IBS and other digestive problem, CFS, tintinus, tennis elbow, shoulder pain, knee pain, backpain, sciatica, toe pain, gout, hip pain and clicking noise, kneck pain, rash and hive, pimples and other skin problem, tinnitus, chest pain, heart palpitation, sensitive to noise, sensitive to bright light, SAD, eye pain, ear pain, arthritis in fingers and knee, burning sensation in different parts of the body, pins and needles, buzzing muscle, burning mouth & tongue, unexplain dental pain, burping , belching, gas, nightmare, insomnia, sleep walking, sleep talking, night sweat, night terror awakening,... I'm sure if I think back long enough I will remember a few more.

I went to doctors and got all kind of tests done. I was diagnosed with many diseases I've listed above and was prescribed many kind of meds. Nothing helped me much, the symptoms keep increase in intensity and keep changing. At one time I was thinking of ending it all. The thought of hurting my mom is the only thing that keep me from doing it. So I start reading and reading as much as I can about my health problem.

One of the first book I've read is "Stop worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie. Dale taught reader how to conquer worry. He gave many examples of how people overcame all kind of hardship and traumatic events and move on with life. He wrote about tms/anxiety before the terms tms and anxiety were invented. He gave practical and easy to understand techniques to overcome worry. He gave examples after examples of real life people that helped me see that my problem is not unique, my problem had been overcame by countless other people. He gave me hope and he ended my suicidal thoughts. I've see that there is a way out. They can heal, so can I. A year after I've read the book, my anxiety level went down 50% and I don't have panic attack as often as before.

5 days before my appointment with the surgeon to operate on my back to cure my back pain, I went to the library to read up on book about back and back surgery. I just wanted to know what to expect during and after the surgery and be prepare for it. I happened to find "Healing Back Pain" by Dr. Sarno. You might have guess by now, I canceled the scheduled surgery 2 days before I have to go under the knife. My chronic and painful back pain/sciatica is 80% better about a week after I've read the book. I considered myself one of those who had experienced a "book cure". Dr Sarno taught me that the mind is a wonderful machine, but when I feed it strong negative emotions, it can and will produce not only symptoms that consider mental but also symptoms that will effect the muscles, nerve at many parts of the body. Many health problems I thought were physical, now I've realized they were the products of my emotions. I'm not doom for life, I've see a way out and my fear level went way down.

Although I've gotten much better, and my health has improved to the point that I can functions and work almost as normal as before I was sick. Many of the symptoms has disappeared or subsided. But the anxiety is still there and it go up and down in intensity. The chronic pain keep disappeared then reappeared. I have my up and down. I was happy I got better but I wanted more. I want a 100% better. And that's when my best friend let me borrowed "Hope and Help for your Nerves" by dr. Claire Weekes. I also got an audio copy of the book. Her calming voice and just the caring way she used her words has helped me a lot. I keep listen to the tape for days and days, then one day it just clicked for me. One day I just realized that all my symptoms were started by my emotion, by the intense stress, but my symptoms stay with me because I fear it. It being keep alive by my fear. I feared the symptoms, I feared what the symptoms mean to my body, I worry about the future of my health. And if I can some how stop that fear I would be cure, and that's is exactly what I did. I just refuse to fear anymore. I am sick of being sick and I'm not going to take it anymore. No more fear for me. Yes Sir, no more fear. Whatever happen happen, I'm not going to fear anymore.

Boom, I was cured. After a few more weeks of what I called "exposure therapy" and deconditioning myself to many situation that trigger a automatic respond from my body, I'm completely cured. That was about ten years ago. I now happily married. I love my job, my family, my life. I am content and confidence. I faced the same work stress and life stress now just like before, but it doesn't bother me anymore. I am at peace.

Here is my conclusion:
life stress, life trauma, negative emotions... start the symptoms. Fear is what keep the symptoms alive.

You want to stop new symptoms from appearing, change your perception about life. think positive, slow down, be compassionate, get involve, be with people, do charity work,...
You want to stop existing symptoms, just stop fearing it. stop focusing on your symptoms, stop focusing on the body, move on and live your life as if everything is fine. There are many techniques out there to help with overcome your fear like : positive affirmation, meditation, praying, live in the present. But the most important is to accept that your ill is caused by your emotions. If you can accept that you're half way there. The fear just start to melt away. The rest is just conditioning that we have to deal with.

think about the past created symptoms. Think about the future keep your symptoms alive. The past created anger, the future produce fear. Stop both of them, live in the present and you will have peace.

I hope this helped inpire you to heal yourself. I was there, I can heal so can you. I'm not a very smart guy, I'm a college dropped out and I have failed at many things in life, if I can do it, you can do it.

I pick 'Balto" as my screen name because of that Disney cartoon character of the same name. I just want to be that dog that bring medicine to help the villagers. The medicine is right inside you. Be strong, think healthy, don't be affraid, and you will heal. We are much more powerful than we think we are. We just have to take control of our thinking.

You are what you think.
Click to expand...


What a beautiful, powerful story. Thank you!!
 
Balto, I have read your story many times to try to help me deal with fear. Over the last month or so I am having trouble controlling my high blood pressure and I believe my anxiety has a lot to do with it. I have read the many problems you had over a 20-year period. Did you ever struggle with high blood pressure during that time and, if so, were you able to help bring it under control by eliminating your fear about it?
 
Hi Lazarus. I don't think I ever mentioned it in my post, but I had a mini stroke in my 30's. I had high blood pressure and angina back then.
Although I do believe that my angina and high blood pressure were mind body in origin. I don't take chances when it come to the heart. I have regular check up and test. I take med that doctor subscribed to me. I meditated and changed my diet to more "green". I refused to fear it. I was concern and take actions that I believed will help, but I have no fear. No fear for my health, my finance, my love life, my ...
And when anxiety and panic attack no longer stay with me, all my test came back normal and I no longer have angina or high blood pressure. Under 120/80 at every check up now.
Hope this help.
 
Balto, thanks for your reply - it is helpful. I am taking blood pressure medicine, take blood pressure readings each day and it seems to be under control now. Do you still take blood pressure medicine now to keep yours under control?
 
No I don't take any drug now. My blood pressure is normal for years now. When you're happy everything tend to be good.
My dad used to have high blood pressure and he is diabetic. He checked his pressure and sugar every few hours for years. I told him whatever you focus on, whatever you think about all day long, will intensified and get worst. He listen to me and stopped checking his BP and sugar everyday. Just once in a few weeks, then not anymore. He is in his 90 now and seem to be healthy.
 
balto said:
This is my first post here. Just joined last night. I am a member at tmshelp.com forum for a couple years and post frequently over there. I have know about this forum but just didn't have the time to spend at both places. Don't want to be redundant. I saw quite a few members belong to both forums, which is very nice, it kind of seeing your old friends in another town. :)
The following is my success story that I've posted at tmshelp.com, I hope this story will help trigger some healing power in some people here.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It take me a while to sit down and write this, My life right now is so full with love and happiness that I find it so hard to sit for long for fear of missing out on living life. :)

I hope by reading another healing story will help you in your journey to better health. Mind and Body.

First, I want to tell you a little about my background. Because I think it would help you understand better why I get tms/anxiety. I grown up in the war torned country of Vietnam. At 16 I escaped from Vietnam and spend almost a year in refugee camp in Malaysia and Phillipine and came to the US in 1981 alone, I was one of those boat people. I am now 50. I came from a lovely and wonderful family. Love my mom and very proud of my dad. Eight wonderful siblings and we got along very well. There is always love and laughter in our house, even the air raid and the bombing outside couldn't silent us for long. I would say my childhood is great and I wouldn't trade it for anything. I was always happy and always healthy, carefree and confidence.

My Mindbody syndrome started in the late 80's, I made a surprise visit to my long time girlfriend and caught her with another guy. My world turned up side down that day and nothing is the same since. All my tms/anxiety symptoms started soon after that. The sleepless night, the anger triggered stress I constantly feel, the loneliness that never leave... turn into anxiety and IBS. My head feel foggy all the time, I feel like a zomby, I just get up and go to work then drive home to spend the rest of the day all alone, everyday. Every where I go I have to know exactly where the closest bathroom is. I have to stand at the closest exit when I'm in any building, just incase my stomach is acting up. Probiotic, tumtum, and all kind of med my doctor gave me... rarely help. Xanax gave me a weird feeling so I stop taking it. Zoloft is not any better. So I just endure my anxiety and IBS. Long story short, here is the list of symptoms I had suffered from for almost 20 years:
- Anxiety & panic attack, agoraphobia, ptsd, depression, suicidal, headache, IBS and other digestive problem, CFS, tintinus, tennis elbow, shoulder pain, knee pain, backpain, sciatica, toe pain, gout, hip pain and clicking noise, kneck pain, rash and hive, pimples and other skin problem, tinnitus, chest pain, heart palpitation, sensitive to noise, sensitive to bright light, SAD, eye pain, ear pain, arthritis in fingers and knee, burning sensation in different parts of the body, pins and needles, buzzing muscle, burning mouth & tongue, unexplain dental pain, burping , belching, gas, nightmare, insomnia, sleep walking, sleep talking, night sweat, night terror awakening,... I'm sure if I think back long enough I will remember a few more.

I went to doctors and got all kind of tests done. I was diagnosed with many diseases I've listed above and was prescribed many kind of meds. Nothing helped me much, the symptoms keep increase in intensity and keep changing. At one time I was thinking of ending it all. The thought of hurting my mom is the only thing that keep me from doing it. So I start reading and reading as much as I can about my health problem.

One of the first book I've read is "Stop worrying and Start Living" by Dale Carnegie. Dale taught reader how to conquer worry. He gave many examples of how people overcame all kind of hardship and traumatic events and move on with life. He wrote about tms/anxiety before the terms tms and anxiety were invented. He gave practical and easy to understand techniques to overcome worry. He gave examples after examples of real life people that helped me see that my problem is not unique, my problem had been overcame by countless other people. He gave me hope and he ended my suicidal thoughts. I've see that there is a way out. They can heal, so can I. A year after I've read the book, my anxiety level went down 50% and I don't have panic attack as often as before.

5 days before my appointment with the surgeon to operate on my back to cure my back pain, I went to the library to read up on book about back and back surgery. I just wanted to know what to expect during and after the surgery and be prepare for it. I happened to find "Healing Back Pain" by Dr. Sarno. You might have guess by now, I canceled the scheduled surgery 2 days before I have to go under the knife. My chronic and painful back pain/sciatica is 80% better about a week after I've read the book. I considered myself one of those who had experienced a "book cure". Dr Sarno taught me that the mind is a wonderful machine, but when I feed it strong negative emotions, it can and will produce not only symptoms that consider mental but also symptoms that will effect the muscles, nerve at many parts of the body. Many health problems I thought were physical, now I've realized they were the products of my emotions. I'm not doom for life, I've see a way out and my fear level went way down.

Although I've gotten much better, and my health has improved to the point that I can functions and work almost as normal as before I was sick. Many of the symptoms has disappeared or subsided. But the anxiety is still there and it go up and down in intensity. The chronic pain keep disappeared then reappeared. I have my up and down. I was happy I got better but I wanted more. I want a 100% better. And that's when my best friend let me borrowed "Hope and Help for your Nerves" by dr. Claire Weekes. I also got an audio copy of the book. Her calming voice and just the caring way she used her words has helped me a lot. I keep listen to the tape for days and days, then one day it just clicked for me. One day I just realized that all my symptoms were started by my emotion, by the intense stress, but my symptoms stay with me because I fear it. It being keep alive by my fear. I feared the symptoms, I feared what the symptoms mean to my body, I worry about the future of my health. And if I can some how stop that fear I would be cure, and that's is exactly what I did. I just refuse to fear anymore. I am sick of being sick and I'm not going to take it anymore. No more fear for me. Yes Sir, no more fear. Whatever happen happen, I'm not going to fear anymore.

Boom, I was cured. After a few more weeks of what I called "exposure therapy" and deconditioning myself to many situation that trigger a automatic respond from my body, I'm completely cured. That was about ten years ago. I now happily married. I love my job, my family, my life. I am content and confidence. I faced the same work stress and life stress now just like before, but it doesn't bother me anymore. I am at peace.

Here is my conclusion:
life stress, life trauma, negative emotions... start the symptoms. Fear is what keep the symptoms alive.

You want to stop new symptoms from appearing, change your perception about life. think positive, slow down, be compassionate, get involve, be with people, do charity work,...
You want to stop existing symptoms, just stop fearing it. stop focusing on your symptoms, stop focusing on the body, move on and live your life as if everything is fine. There are many techniques out there to help with overcome your fear like : positive affirmation, meditation, praying, live in the present. But the most important is to accept that your ill is caused by your emotions. If you can accept that you're half way there. The fear just start to melt away. The rest is just conditioning that we have to deal with.

think about the past created symptoms. Think about the future keep your symptoms alive. The past created anger, the future produce fear. Stop both of them, live in the present and you will have peace.

I hope this helped inpire you to heal yourself. I was there, I can heal so can you. I'm not a very smart guy, I'm a college dropped out and I have failed at many things in life, if I can do it, you can do it.

I pick 'Balto" as my screen name because of that Disney cartoon character of the same name. I just want to be that dog that bring medicine to help the villagers. The medicine is right inside you. Be strong, think healthy, don't be affraid, and you will heal. We are much more powerful than we think we are. We just have to take control of our thinking.

You are what you think.
Click to expand...
 
Hi again everyone. Balto I first read your story a couple of years ago and at that time I was in the worst shape I could imagine. I had constant pain of one variety or another. I was constantly worried about it. Wanting it to go away. I didn’t understand the reason. A Doctor had diagnosed me with an incurable autoimmune disease. I was slowly dying. Your story gave me a new confidence and set me out to find a different answer. I started letting go of worry. Little by little I began to heal. I went forward and fell back a few times as life’s issues kept coming up and I didn’t see the correlation of anxiety, bad thoughts and pain. I started meditating each day. I gained control of the pain. I took my life back. I no longer take ANY medications. I even stopped taking pills for acid reflux disease that I had been labeled with 20 years ago as a young professional. Doctors rarely look into our lives and what’s going on in our minds- psychological issues like worry about a new career, marriage, failure, etc. They set us on a course of body only and completely miss the true root of the problem.
I am 100% free of pain and healed of all issues for quite a while now. If I would have stayed in the medical community and kept looking for the “right prescription”, I would still be suffering and getting worse. I’m very fortunate to have learned about TMS and read stories like yours. My wife is now even becoming a mind-body coach to help others heal. Thank you so much. Keep spreading the word everyone.
Billy
 
That is so wonderful for you. And is great that your wife is a mind body coach. Post like this really motivate and make people like me feel good and want to keep spreading the word. Thank you for your kind words Billy.
 
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