Having trouble thinking of the word for...

So anxiety is my remaining TMS symptom. And it is the hardest for me to tolerate.
I'm trying to find the best ways to tolerate anxiety as I'm weaning off Xanax.
So I kinda get the Clair Weeks "floating" through anxiety thing. I didn't say I was good at it but I understand it and sometimes can do it, if I remember.

But I'm looking for a word or phrase the act of breathing/concentrating/getting on top/be in control/maybe distracting from pain whether it be physical or emotional. I'm trying to determine if this unnamed coping technique/skill is something positive to cultivate or is just trying too hard.

Since I don't have a word let me give you an example:
When I was in the hardest part of a quick and intense natural childbirth, about 9cm, and I was verbally and physically expressing the pain/panic of that intensity of labor and my midwife suggested I pick something to concentrate on and "dig deep" and breathe through the next contraction. I did that and for one contraction I feel more peaceful and I'm sure outwardly I looked more in control. HOWEVER I found doing that so difficult I just went back to my cussing and swaying and my baby was born soon after.

Recently when I'm anxious I've tried the same thing. It isn't relaxation or meditation or effortless floating...it is something else. Like a concentrated effort to remain utterly present in the moment that falls away when I try to relax. Yes, my anxiety is reduced for a few moments but I cannot maintain it. Whatever it is.

Does anybody know what I'm talking about?
Thanks!
Laura

 

Hi Lady of the Lake

The baby thing I did with my wife way back was Lamaze with my third son. This was suppose to help focus and cope when the contractions came.

Is the word you need "mindfulness"? I believe mindfulness is a form of focus meditation.

I read an article in a magazine recently, some companies are offering classes to their employees. Loads of free stuff all over the Internet.

 

Eckhart Tolle would call it 'Being'. I just re-read "The Power of Now' and that seems to be exactly what you're referring to. Utterly present in the Now, without past and future thinking.

 

If that is mindfulness, it is REALLY HARD FOR ME. Sigh.

 

Allowing yourself to fully feel the anxiety is a practice of mindfulness which will diminish it's power over time. You could set a timer for 30 seconds once a day to start, and just fully allow it to take you in. In time it is just a sensation, over which which we lay all these stories and feelings. What I am suggesting is that we're "anxious about our anxiety" if you will. Fully allowing anxiety, without layering anything on top, or at least learning to observe and not identify with what we layer on top-- this might be very helpful.

 

Fully feeling the anxiety breaks it into small parts. Oh, my heart is beating quickly. Or, my stomach feels tight, I feel like I will be sick. Things like that, while unpleasant to contemplate let you see that the physical sensations of anxiety are separate from your mind-state.

 

You can practice being present when you don't have anxiety too. Like when you're driving try focusing on driving. Like the bumps in the road, the signs, the paint of the lines on the concrete. Or in the shower. Smell the soap, feel the water. I find this extremely difficult to do because my mind is always racing with other thoughts but it's good practice.

 

It actually sounds like you're talking about hypnosis! This isn't something discussed much on this forum (it is different than meditation, different brainwave states). I haven't had my baby yet but my husband and I did a class to do hypnosis for childbirth and it really sounds like the same mental state where you focus on something (not specifically the contractions) but go somewhere else in your mind and "float" through it and breathe. It is a distinct mental state from being deep in meditation, almost closer to a light sleep, but I think the mental states are related. Maybe this is similar to what you're trying for anxiety?