Day 1 First Day in the Educational Program

I've had lower back problems ever since I was a kid - I remember being 10 years old and squirming around in my seat in class because the pain was so bad. It comes and goes, and I also have a history of anxiety and ulcers, so I figured TMS might be the culprit. I've had daily pain for over a year now, and have tried everything except for surgery - PT, acupuncture, chiropractors, massages, not exercising, acupressure, network chiropractors, and even cortisone shots. Nothing has helped. The pain is worst at night and in the morning, which makes it tough to exercise to my full potential because I like morning workouts. I was extremely active (crossfit type exercises are my favorite), and now I'm down to Bikram yoga to try to get things moving again.

So here I am on Day 1 of the program: What would a life without TMS mean to you?

I would be so happy to exercise the way I want to - to be able to do burpees and situps without flinching again and run fast and for more than 3 miles at a time. I would love to not take Aleve daily and sleep through the night, and especially not curse upon waking because I'm so stiff first thing in the morning. It'd be great to be able to sit for more than 30 minutes without squirming, and take a cross-country flight without major pain killers and sleep aids!

 

Hi NewGwen,

Welcome to the SEP and to the path of recovery. I am on my final two days of the program and I can say with complete confidence that I am a changed man. I started after 6 months of nasty low-back/butt/leg pain, could hardly walk, stand, etc. was in physical therapy, chiropractor, acupuncture, pain medications, etc.. the usual. My MRI showed 3 disk bulges/herniations touching nerves, so that is what I believe it to be....that is until I read Dr. Sarno and found this site.

I encourage you to really get involved, follow the instructions, do the journaling, take time to read all the suggested readings, and watch the videos. I'd say I'm 95% cured. There is still some very light lingering "annoyance", but I still have some work to do. I've been walking miles with hardly any pain these last few weeks. But even more, if the pain comes on now, it just doesn't bother me like it used to, I sorta just see it, acknowledge it, and go about my business. It took working the program to get to that point, but 6 weeks compared to 6 months is nothing! I made more progress in the first week than I did from two months of PT!!! It's going to challenge you and your "beliefs" in medicine, but you have nothing to lose. We generally wind up here when all else fails.

So give it a shot, especially before considering anything invasive like surgery. If you put the work in, you will get better. Have you read Dr. Sarno yet? I assume you have since you're here, but in case you haven't, definitely read Healing Back Pain. Again, it will challenge everything you've believed about your pain, and backs in general. You'll be encouraged to resume life as normal, i.e. stop ALL "therapies" (PT, chiro, etc.), stop taking medications, and most importantly, stop thinking STRUCTURAL problems are the cause of your pain and shift to psychological as the reason.....again, this can be difficult and takes some time to sink in, so be patient and kind to yourself.

It was a process for me. A few of the bigger moves in my case were: I ripped up and threw out my MRI test results (I found myself obsessively reading over them and comparing them to other results I could find on the web and even here on the TMSwiki site...); I got back to the gym and stopped using a weight belt; and I even cancelled an appointment I had made with a TMS doctor because it was more than a month away and it was hindering my recovery (that is, my 100% belief in TMS was lagging because I had this pending appointment, but as soon as I cancelled it, my recovery sped up significantly). Everyone's journey is unique to their situation, but I've found that really committing to the program and brining what I learn from it into my daily life has had profound results. Also, sharing along the way here in these forums has been extremely helpful - there's something about knowing that you're not alone in your TMS recovery that really helps. I encourage you to look through my past posts for some insight into my experience with SEP. Like I said, I'm just now finishing, tomorrow is my final day, and I feel like a changed person. It's amazing. And I feel as though it is something that one carries on with, not just like a one time 6 week thing and that's that...it has helped me to get to know myself and taught me tools to "deal" with my emotions. Learning and accepting TMS is a life changer for sure.

Good luck and I hope to hear from you along the way!

Best,

Kev

 

Hi, NewGwen.

Kevin's reply is the best you could get. He really is an inspiration.

You are at the start of a wonderful journey into healing and self-discovery. TMS and the SEP has changed my life as well.
I especially found journaling to be a door to open my repressed emotions. Mine went back to childhood when my parents divorced.
Don't push yourself to do more exercise than may be possible for you, but accept any pain as you resume normal activity and some exercise.
When you discover your repressed emotions, you will get back to more exercise. Keep posting about your progress.

 

I've introduced myself elsewhere and am very eager to start the work, and to focus my brain on relearning. Anxiety and grief have been with me all my life, but there is more to me. I am looking forward to spending the next 30 years finding potential I never knew existed. I look at Dr. Sarno in his nineties, and think---it's not over till it's over.

 

Good luck. And welcome