Fibromyalgia to OCD

Hi everyone. I am new here but have been reading about and working with tms concept for a while. I have a question for all of you that may know. I have had really bad fibromyalgia for a few years that started after a series of traumatic events and onset at the same time as hashimoto’s thyroiditis. Reading about tms and working to access buried emotions has reduced the fibromyalgia and I have gone from being in bed most of the day to being a graduate student while working part time doing a very physical job. The only problem is that Since this happened, I have developed OCD, with lots of ruminating, pure o obsessional thoughts and mental rituals. It is almost worse than the fibromyalgia. I find that for me I am either experiencing really painful negative emotion and ocd symptoms, or if those retract back into the subconscious, I get hit with fibro again. It is like a switch I can flip back and forth. I do see it as a positive sign though. I am wondering if you all agree with me that this is the symptom imperative. I feel like maybe the ocd is trying to distract me from deeper feelings of rage or other subconscious emotions. I hope that I can get a handle on it and heal it like I have almost done for the fibro, even though that is not completely gone.

 

Yes it's all part and parcel of the same thing...anxiety and negative thought habits. The key is to stop believing your thoughts and buying into these stories your brain keeps creating. You don't need to be afraid of your thoughts or ward off danger. You are already fine and safe. The hashimotos is irrelevant but getting that diagnosis amped up your fear. Thyroid issues are easily managed with meds so you can check that off the danger list . Sometimes we react to present stressors as if we are reacting to the past. In other words, our nervous systems get stuck and confused and is reacting to something from the past that's no longer relevant in the present.

 

You identified your problem very precisely. It is quite common that reduction in pain comes with increase in anxiety, depression and other mental health issues. They are connected vessels, because brain sends out distress signals in form of both emotional disturbances and physical pain. Unless you address your emotional luggage and figure out how to disperse your negative emotions, you may be stuck in the cycles of back and forth between physical and mental issues. It took me a while to learn how to let the emotions wash over my system and dissolve without me pushing them inside. Once I learned that, I started getting better, but until then, I was bouncing between anxiety and pain for a while.

 

Thank you for your reply, it is very helpful. I have a question though: how were you able to purge or release the unconscious emotions? I have tried Nicole Sach’s journaling thing and it was VERY intense for me. I am wondering if there are any other ways that you have found to be helpful? I could go back to the journaling, but I am wondering what else I can do. Thanks a million!!!!
Violet

 

Yes I agree that the hashimoto’s is not something I need to worry about now. I wonder if it could have a mind body origin though because it is autoimmune and it’s onset was during a time of trauma and stress. I am learning to let go of the thoughts but it is very hard. Thanks for your reply.

 

Not to dismiss Nicole Sach or journaling by any means, but only to make a point that each one of us is unique and needs to figure out what works and what does not work for them, I tried journaling and I tried Nicole Sach, but neither one worked well for me, despite working very well for others. What worked for me was a class on handling negative emotions and somatic meditation. It literally taught me how to walk my emotion through the body until it finally disperses. Remember, emotions are just flows of hormones in our bloodstream. If you give it enough time and focus your brain on deescalation, they eventually release themselves.

I have said it many times on this forum that we need to be our own doctors and trust that we know ourselves better than anybody else. Try anything and everything that seems reasonable and safe, give it enough time to make your judgment and don't get disappointed that it did not work. It may sound confusing, but I tried multiple things until I figured out how to meditate and how to deal with my emotions.

As for journaling, when you say it is very intense, does it mean that it gets you too fired up? That could be your step 1 to emotional release. You just need to learn how to wash the emotion out of the system, and that is where somatic meditation is helpful.

 

I don't know enough of Hashimoto's, but there is a strong evidence that autoimmune conditions get triggered by stress and may be handled effectively by mindbody modalities. Shannon Harvey healed herself from autoimmune condition and writes extensively on the subject.

 

I totally agree with you and TG957, that Hashimotos and other auto immune conditions are exacerbated by stress. I would say though that thyroid issues can be managed well. Myself and my whole family has it, and my sister unfortunately has pretty severe vitiligo from Hashimotos. I don't think it has anything to do with the fibromyalgia in terms of causality. It's just that your brain and nervous system are in a general state of stress physiology. As long as you are taking your meds for it, don't let it take up too much of your thoughts. I get my blood work done once a year, take Synthroid, and that's about it.

As far as journaling, I have to admit it never appealed to me either and I never did it but I still got better and overcame TMS. I think it's wonderful if it provides a release but if a person marinates in past traumas, it can have the opposite effect. The tools we use in our journey are so individual and there's no right or wrong answer. A walk in nature can be just as beneficial as journaling, for example. I think a person should always do what they enjoy and what makes sense for them.

 

Re what TG957 said about emotions - there is a great book that i found interesting and helpful - Molecules of Emotion by Candace Pert. It really shows where science and psychology meet - inside us!!
Good luck - stay with it - I had fibro for 22 years and am enjoying life SO much more without...!!

 

When I did her journaling program I ended up with intense suicidal thoughts and severe distress. I am not saying per program is bad, I just think I may have too much trauma to do the journaling in the way she recommended. I have been experimenting with just setting a timer and sitting with painful emotions and the bodily sensations that come with them and this is also intense but seems more managible to me so far. What was the name of the class you took? It sounds kind of like what I have been doing maybe. I also just started seeming an internal family systems therapist and this is really interesting so far. She incorporates somatic stuff as well.

 

That’s amazing that you are free of fibro. I am so happy for you! I will check out that book!