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Feeling safe

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by Renee, Sep 14, 2015.

  1. Renee

    Renee Well known member

    It seems like no matter what I do I will no longer feel safe in this world. And that seems to be the thing through meditation, etc., that you need to feel to recover from TMS. I am only on Day 5 so I am new to all this, but am feeling very discouraged.

    I cannot afford to go to a TMS therapist, I've already spent so much money on dealing with pelvic pain since a child, neck pain since last year, and numerous other TMS symptoms throughout my life. I once had a therapist tell me that if I could get my anxiety under control everything would fall into place and I agree. I've just read Claire Weeks book which I liked. She tells you how to address the panic but not the fear. When you are at work walking across the way to another building and you have an attack so bad that you feel you will collapse, how do you let that just happen? I don't know what I look like, but I feel like I look like I am drunk. How do you conquer the fear of looking like a freak in front of your co-workers???
  2. SunnyinFL

    SunnyinFL Well known member

    Dear Renee,

    It can be very discouraging to deal with continuing pain - many of us can relate to that feeling. Please know you are not alone and that many of us have gone from that state of discouragement and found hope and are recovering. Also, please know that feeling discouraged is normal - try to understand that and let yourself just feel it.

    There are also paths forward. Have you started the SEP? It is on this Web site and free. It's very helpful and I highly recommend it. And, the community of support on this wiki is also free - please keep reaching out and using it.

    Not feeling safe is another common feeling, and fear seems to be the opposite of safe. I overcame a lot of my fear and made a lot of progress by reading and re-reading and applying the techniques provided by Dr. Schubiner in his Blog post. To find it, go to the list of forums, click on "Mindbody Blogs," and then click on the one entitled, "Understanding and Overcoming Fear."

    Finally, it's completely understandable to not want to look like a "freak" in front of your co-workers. Please know that you don't have to. The feelings themselves are invisible; you can just sit quietly and feel them and let them pass and no one will know. It might take some practice and self-talk, but you don't have to act out or act on any of your feelings. Or, another option is to decide, consciously, "I'm at work and don't want to feel this now. I will visualize myself opening a closet, putting my feelings on a shelf, and shutting the door. I don't have to look at them now. I can go to that closet and open the door and look at them when I'm back at home tonight."

    I hope that some of these ideas will provide you some comfort and some ways you might be able to make some progress. Please remember to be gentle with yourself. Thinking of you, Sunny
    BloodMoon and mike2014 like this.
  3. mike2014

    mike2014 Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Renee,

    A panic attack is an overactive response to your body’s baseline response to fear or stress. With that said, once you have overcome the fear or stress there will be no need for the sensation of a panic attack.

    It's said that most disorders are caused by external factors and how we pereceive and re-act to these. I would suggest taking up mindfulness meditation; learning to be aware and not pass judgement, but simply observing and letting go.

    Once you've quitened the mind, I would recommend exploring your emotions and personality traits. Paying particular attention to how you interact with others, react to stress, anger etc.

    I understand that you are afraid of others perceptions, thats a normal response. But I would try not to add extra worry in what seems to be overwhelming already. There are a few techniques that you could incorporate when feeling a panic attack, most noteably you could shift your focuss to breathing until that moment passes.

    I would also suggest that you be kind, gentle and loving to yourself. The more fear or negativity to you instill, the more heightened symptoms can become.
    SunnyinFL likes this.
  4. Renee

    Renee Well known member

    Thanks SunnyinFL. I printed the blog out. Sounds like just what I need to study.
    SunnyinFL likes this.
  5. Renee

    Renee Well known member

    Thanks Mike. I have managed to take a deep breath when the feeling comes & that has helped stop the attack. I still feel the after effects of a panic attack (shaking inside, etc.) but it is still better than having a full blown attack.
    SunnyinFL likes this.
  6. mike2014

    mike2014 Beloved Grand Eagle

    I think a combination of deep breaths to quieten the mind, followed by tapping (eft) on fear and worry will give you some comfort.
    SunnyinFL likes this.

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