Hey all, I hope everyone is doing well. I was doing a bit better for awhile with my widespread body pain. Alot of the pain in various parts of my body had subsided except for my arms, elbows and hands. However, the past two weeks I have been doing some intense pschotherapy with my TMS therapist and my pain has just completely reexploded in every part of my body. I'm feeling so discouraged and defeated and like I'm going completely backwards. I have had some major crying episodes as I have tried to allow myself to express buried pains from childhood adn the past which I have typically numbed with various things. I just get so scared that I'm doing something wrong and don't understand why the pain is worse. I thought letting out some of that stuff was supposed to lead to healing and further reductions in pain. All of my muscles in my body (low back, neck, arms, elbows, hands, wrists, back of head, glutes and legs are completely tightened up, twitching, burning and some are numb). I know I've written about how I'm mostly obsessed about my arms since I use them for work and playing video games, well last night was the first night since the pain started last year where I couldn't even play because of the pain. I also tried going to the gym yesterday and my groin hurt. I have an inguinal hernia which was in pain several months ago and then stopped being in pain so I felt most of the pain part of it was TMS. Well I got scared on the eliptical after 5 minutes yesterday and just stopped. I'm convinced I have fibromyalgia which I know is TMS. But now I feel more discouraged because according to Steve O. I have "TMS on steroids". I just feel like I'm never going to figure anything out. I worry that allowing myself to cry and feel depressed is just making things worse. I'm afraid to try and push through the pain to play my video games or go tto the gym. I felt like I was doing a bit better and now I feel liek I'm back at teh beginning. Texting on my phone hurts and everything hurts. I'm full of fear and know I'm obsessing about my body again. Two weeks ago I was telling my wife hwo it felt good that when my back was hurting or my legs got numb I didn't worry about it because I knew what it was. Now I'm completely overwhelmed again. I'm afraid I can't play my games, I'm afraid I'm not going to get better. I don't know why playing a game last night would have created as much pain as it did. It was a game that required holding down a trigger to accelerate a car. So now I'm afraid to play that type of game again. Like maybe my body can't handle holding down something. Even turning the door knobs hurts a bit in my house. I even had thoughts of what if i should be back in physical therapy. I know these are all coutner TMS, but I just feel a bit discouraged and defeated.