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Eyes - TMS cranial nerves?

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by Anna1, Jul 2, 2020.

  1. Anna1

    Anna1 Peer Supporter

    OK, here I am again. It's a continuing (never ending?) story. I'm definitely a TMS pro :rolleyes:. Please read with me. Thank you!

    This time it's my eyes/head. And I think that the optician has made it way worse by selling me glasses. Glasses that I haven't received yet. They should be ready on Saturday. He measured a small +(ouch, 41 and declining :arghh: and a small - deviation on both eyes. Plus a cilinder.

    The day before I had had a very tiring drive with many roundabouts, navigation without sound on a small i-phone and bright sunlight. I couldn't see the screen because of polarized sunglasses, so I was switching between with - and without sunglasses. My head felt like it exploded. It was better after I layed down for 20 minutes. I was at my mum's who can be very empathic (and worried) when something like that happens. I went to the optician Monday afternoon.

    On Monday and Tuesday I was exhausted by the strain on my eyes. I have tried TMS-strategy, but it's still there. Especially when I read a book, the paper, a screen. When my ex dropped off my daughter it seemed to go away. I was distracted! Welcome back, TMS, old friend/foe bangheada

    A few things are mixed up:

    - I am not sure if I really need glasses

    - I am sure that the tiredness and heaviness are too extreme to be just from that small +/- strength (-0.5 / +0,5).

    - I have never had problems or tiredness with reading or watching screens. I can use my eyes endlessly without tiring. Except for:
    • after a rear end car accident (see other thread) and the remainder was definitely TMS and I totally conquered it
    • recently in Zoom-meetings my eyes seem to get tired in the same way as in the car on Sunday
    - I am very anxious about deciding so quickly about the glasses that appear to be over-expensive in retrospect. My best (sometimes overbearing) friend and my sister (with whom I have major issues around setting boundaries) made it clear that they thought I made a ridiculous decision. The first because of the money, the second because of the quick decision. I am very angry about their reaction, and I also think they both might have a point. I was just very convinced about the particular model I chose and didnt want to waste my time running from one optician to the other.

    - My mother stands behind my choice of the glasses because she is convinced these will help. Which is confirming there a "stuctural abnormality' behind it all.

    When I read the above I am grinning. It is kind of hilarious. It is so obvious when I read the summary. TMS anyone?

    Still, how the F* can I get rid of it this time? Usually sharing here does the trick when it lasts for more than a few days...

    I am processing a lot these days. Actually. I've heard myself say that "my eyes are opened" :pompous: for how deeply unhealthy my relationship with my ex-husband has been. Isn't that symbolic.... (I'm crying now). I think I have to thank my body once more for pointing out something is below the surface. On Tuesday I have cried so hard about the moulded cave that the relationship has been without me seeing it. I am grieving the fact that I have been feeling so deeply unsafe that I thought needed the walls of that cave.

    Still, the tiredness in my head and the strain on my eyes are a bummer. And it's very persistent compared to other TMS-attacks... Usually my subconscious respons much quicker to the TMS-approach.

    Thank you for reading my latest :shame:

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