Early morning anxiety/depression

[AC45]

Hi fellow TMSers,

I’ve healed from a lot of things (RSI, hip pain, knee pain, 80% of my anxiety, etc). So, there is much hope for us who believe in TMS.

Insomnia has been the hardest thing to shake. I used to have sleep onset insomnia and now I have sleep maintenance insomnia.

I know it is all TMS. I am two years into my journey and I have steadily improved - slowly but surely. Today I played Dr Google and got discouraged.

I’ve had this cycle for 2 years of waking up @ 3-4am, feeling scared / panicky and then I get better as the day goes on. Again, I know it is TMS but I am wondering if anyone else has had this feel bad in the morning, feel better in the afternoon cycle.

I’ve never been diagnosed with depression but the early morning wake ups seem to be linked to it (or says Dr Google).

I know the best thing I can do is stop and accept that it is TMS. I just get kind of tired after two years.

Thanks for your thoughts.

-AC45

 

[Dorado]

I have the same issue due to my cortisol and adrenaline levels running high (my doctor ordered testing), which is definitely a product of anxiety. Meditation, TMS work, natural supplements like 5-HTP and phosphatidylserine, eating well (but still enjoying some indulgences), physical activity that isn’t too stimulating, and breathing exercises are helping me tremendously.

Stop turning to Dr. Google - horror stories only breed bad results. You’re going to be fine, and plenty of people have recovered.

 

[AC45]

I have the same issue due to my cortisol and adrenaline levels running high (my doctor ordered testing), which is definitely a product of anxiety. Meditation, TMS work, natural supplements like 5-HTP and phosphatidylserine, eating well (but still enjoying some indulgences), physical activity that isn’t too stimulating, and breathing exercises are helping me tremendously.

Stop turning to Dr. Google - horror stories only breed bad results. You’re going to be fine, and plenty of people have recovered.

Thank you so much for the reply. I always appreciate it when someone takes the time. Good guidance!

 

[jsabina]

Hi, when I have bad periods I do have early morning anxiety unfortunately.
I wake up early and I notice my breathing accelerated and my pulse.
In a way I learnt to stay with it and try to breath slower.
Now that I have pain it's a bit more difficult as I start noticing the discomfort and get more anxious, nervous.

But I think the early morning is due to cortisol from my researches.

Also I have been suffering from anxiety and this early morning insomnia for years with better moments and relapses and think cortisol and hormones are involved

 

[Artmuzz]

I have early morning fear and anxiety too. For the past three years I have been waking up at 3am feeling tense, high anxiety and a sense of fear. I just try and float through the feelings and accept them and I manage to get back to sleep but wake up still feeling on edge with high anxiety but again I just float through it and accept as Claire Weekes mentions in her books. I usually feel a lot better by late afternoon/evening. I then go to bed at 11pm but it's back to the fun and games again in the morning.

 

[AC45]

Hello - Thank you so much for getting back to me. It is reassuring to know that this is a common pattern and I am not alone. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I love Claire Weekes. One of the biggest things I am working on is telling myself that I can feel the way I feel. It is ok not to be ok. I find myself wanting to escape how I feel in the mornings and the frustration of little or no sleep. The scary articles about what a lack of sleep can do to you doesn’t help - nor does perimenopause! Anyway, I really appreciate your time. Thank you! -AC45

 

[nancy]

It looks like many of us have this problem and I have noticed that if I lay there and think about all the problems the
pain kicks in. I really only have pain upon standing. I have always loved to just stay warm and wake up slowly. This am
I laid there and my hip started to ache and my hands and wrists were hurting me. I know it is fear but now I know that I
have to get right up and not ruminate about past traumas. Anyone have this experience. It is so hard to keep my mind off
the past. Thanks for listening! Nancy

 

[Jeannyjay]

I had this problem and along with the pain I was losing wait as I was so anxious and didn’t really feel like eating so no good vitamins etc just exacerbating the problem. I t helped me to just keep repeating over and over again positive affirmations while I went to sleep at night. Things like ,I am strong and I have nothing to fear there is nothing physically wrong with me. I said this over and over again whilst going to sleep and it has really helped. I still have some pain but the horrid anxious fear in the morning has gone. Hope this might help, there is hope and keep strong.

 

[BinLA]

Somehow ran across this old thread and found it interesting....

This is something I've experienced since day 1 of my stress condition. (Anxiety/panic/TMS etc.) I've never been a morning person to begin with, but once the panic kicked in I found it almost unbearable in the mornings. It took many years for me to learn how to gracefully go through the increased panic, GI symptoms and pain.
Over the years, as I got better control of my anxiety disorder... the mornings got more bearable and eventually closer to neutral. But if I have a setback.... mornings resort right back to being hard and just like all of you... ease as the day goes on... to where it's better or even fine at night.

Best I can figure, all of our stress chemials are highest in the morning... and our rest chemicals highest at night. It's probably that simple... so those with increased stress/anxiety simply get this same arc but in a very pronounced way.

Back when I would visit anxiety boards, nearly 100% of people reported worse symptoms in the morning. So, there's likely a hormonal issue to it... so who knows where that fits in with TMS and emotional issues. But it's interesting to see folks here who may have a cross-section of TMS and anxiety disorder going on at the same time... which is what it's always felt like I have had.

 

[MrSurvivor]

My heavens, so helpful to see this is a thing. I have been thinking I was crazy! I often semi-wake early feeling like I am at war. I'm too groggy to get myself up, so I lay there and my brain just stews and takes me into catastrophizing. Recently, it has also been accompanied by an upset stomach, and often carries into the morning.

I like the suggestion on affirmations. Has anyone had any success with adjusting the chemical/hormonal part? Does it help if you force yourself to get up? Exercise? This has been wrecking me for a long time, so I'm really grateful for suggestions and anything that has helped. It is a little relieving just to have the perspective.

 

[BonnieLass]

I wake up most mornings feeling like absolute crap-- emotionally, that is. If it's not anxiety or waking up in a full-blown panic attack, then it's just utter misery and dismay that there is another day in front of me. Especially now with COVID-- the lockdown, the utter isolation, the fear of picking up the disease on a trip to the grocery store or something. And no end in sight.

And as others have said, it's usually around 3 or 4 am. Sometimes I can go back to sleep. I'll put on a meditation recording or music and/or repeat vague affirmations over and over, like "all is well," or the opening lines of the 23rd psalm.

I've been afflicted this way for YEARS... decades, even. I have made some progress, as many years (20+) years ago, I'd wake up in the middle of the night and be consumed with what I can only describe as self-loathing. It was weird. It's not like I'm a serial killer or something. It was existential shame and disgust at being me. I don't have that any more (small mercies), but I long to be one of those people who opens her eyes and rejoices that she has been given another day of life. Can't seem to get there...

 

[Smokey73]

When this happens to me, I blame it on my unconscious, which has been causing anxiety while I sleep. It is a message that I need to journal or do some thinking on what Baseball says "What are you not angry about that you should be?" Some emotion is lurking causing pain and anxiety.

 

[BinLA]

Definitely agree Smokey. The subconscious drives most of this. But I also do think that our bodies are pattern machines. It find patterns that it thinks works and are keeping us safe. So the nervous system and the brain have decided over the years that we all need this huge jolt of adrenaline and cortisol in the morning.

add to that, sleep is a time of recalibration. And if we spend our days worrying or experiencing fight or flight, the brain is trying to recalibrate in the middle of the night. For me at least, I believe this is why I experience frequent and vivid dreams that morph into that waking panic we talk about here.

The good news is, it has gotten better over the years. But during stressful times or flareups can still be rough. We know it’s not dangerous because so many of us here have had it for so many years. But, I do believe we can settle the system down to where it functions normally. I’ve made big improvement at times and usually don’t think about it much in the morning anymore. Other days, I just have to practice acceptance and remember that it’s a process that will work itself out and I will feel better as the day goes on.

Curious how people on this thread have been doing since this was posted, hope everyone is well.

When this happens to me, I blame it on my unconscious, which has been causing anxiety while I sleep. It is a message that I need to journal or do some thinking on what Baseball says "What are you not angry about that you should be?" Some emotion is lurking causing pain and anxiety.

 

[Gojab]

I was not aware that insomnia was TMS! While I have 99% solved my pain issues, I have noticed now that I wake up every morning about 3am. Sometimes anxious. It will help me to know it is TMS. I'm not sure if this will help anyone, but last night I just decided I wasn't going to lie in bed. I got up and read a book (a nice boring one...American Lion by Jon Meacham) for about an hour. I'm tired today, but not anxious. Maybe I'll try napping to catch up on sleep!

 

[Miss Metta]

I get this, too. It's new for me, I've always been great in the mornings. Now, it's hard to get out of bed, foggy head,, fatigue etc, picks up in the afternoon - same as all of you. Interestingly, I read this thread for the first time last night and this morning woken up a bit better. Some of it has lifted. I wonder if by reading all the examples here my mind decided, "this is no big deal, look how many people have it" and relieved an unconscious anxiety about it.

 

[BinLA]

I get this, too. It's new for me, I've always been great in the mornings. Now, it's hard to get out of bed, foggy head,, fatigue etc, picks up in the afternoon - same as all of you. Interestingly, I read this thread for the first time last night and this morning woken up a bit better. Some of it has lifted. I wonder if by reading all the examples here my mind decided, "this is no big deal, look how many people have it" and relieved an unconscious anxiety about it.

It seems to ebb and flow... and I think part of the challenge is that we’re just not quite “ourselves” when we wake. So to face strong feelings of anxiety or depression seemingly for no cause can be alarming. Which builds on itself.

The fact that it does seem to improve as the day goes on for nearly everyone indicates a strong correlation with hormones and body chemistry, in my opinion. In fact the difference between 10 PM at night and 6 AM in the morning for me can be so stark it’s hard to believe it’s even possible.

so it’s a common thing we are dealing with among people with stress illness, stress disorder. Developing a mindset to go through it as what I have focused on and it has improved greatly over the years. I still can’t have times when it is strong though, and it can still be a challenge. It remains one of the more consistent things I deal with and has a very physiological feel. I think it’s a process of the mind calibrating itself, so it’s natural but challenging. As time goes on, hopefully we all will continue to make progress and lessening this stress response.

 

[TrustIt]

Wow...so glad to find this thread. Mornings are awful for me. I wake up at 5 or 6am feeling vibrations in my stomach. Feels like my adrenal glands squeezing if that makes sense. Digestive gurgling, gas, pain, anxiety. My torso feels tight and very heavy when I get up and I immediately get depressed. It usually starts lifting as I move around and have coffee, gets better in the afternoon, and then I usually start feeling good in the evening.

I feel very lazy bc I don't want to do anything at all when I feel like that. It's like my mind wants to go have an active and fun day but my body doesn't and just won't let me . It just wants to sit down. Though I do force myself to get out for a walk everyday and get some sunshine.

On those days I lose interest in life in general. Not in a suicidal way but the things I used to enjoy I don't anymore. I'm desperate to find something to enjoy to distract me from constantly thinking about my body. At the end of the day, after dinner, I start feeling much better. In fact quite good many nights. It seems there is a correlation bt having finished the day and feeling that I can relax guilt free. I do have a cortisol issue based on recent testing. I am trying some different things like lemon balm, cbd oil, magnesium and most recently inositol and a cortisol balancing OTC called Cortisol Calm. I feel like if I can just get my nervous system calm my digestive stuff will go away. I am definitely a TMS candidate with all the personality traits. I get extremely depressed if I don't feel well and I cry and cry which is very cathartic but this just keeps on! I'm completely out of tears...well maybe not.

My story is longer but this has already gotten long without all those details so I won't go into all of it here. In a nutshell, l have been through extreme fear, health anxiety, fear of food, and losing a lot of weight. I'm pretty much over that and just went back to eating most anything I want. But I still wonder if I have an allergy to something I'm eating. Aaarrgh! Anyway, I am steadfast in my belief that it's all TMS but I'm on such a roller coaster with it. I have a few days in a row feeling great and grateful and active and then bam! And I can't tie a damn thing to the symptoms, meaning I can't recall any stressful event that brought it on.

I don't Google anymore but I do keep experimenting with natural supplements and if they don't work right away I move on to another one. I'm driving myself crazy I know but feel powerless over my mind and its obsessing. This then makes me very angry because I have the knowledge I need from all the books and this forum that it's TMS and yet can't seem to get to the bottom of it. I don't know if this rambling will be of help to anybody or not because I'm not providing a solution. I have improved in general, however, so I will add that ray of hope. If nothing else it has helped me regurgitate thoughts about it. I certainly relate to what you all are saying! I am trying to be patient!

 

[BinLA]

Wow...so glad to find this thread. Mornings are awful for me. I wake up at 5 or 6am feeling vibrations in my stomach. Feels like my adrenal glands squeezing if that makes sense. Digestive gurgling, gas, pain, anxiety. My torso feels tight and very heavy when I get up and I immediately get depressed. It usually starts lifting as I move around and have coffee, gets better in the afternoon, and then I usually start feeling good in the evening.

I feel very lazy bc I don't want to do anything at all when I feel like that. It's like my mind wants to go have an active and fun day but my body doesn't and just won't let me . It just wants to sit down. Though I do force myself to get out for a walk everyday and get some sunshine.

On those days I lose interest in life in general. Not in a suicidal way but the things I used to enjoy I don't anymore. I'm desperate to find something to enjoy to distract me from constantly thinking about my body. At the end of the day, after dinner, I start feeling much better. In fact quite good many nights. It seems there is a correlation bt having finished the day and feeling that I can relax guilt free. I do have a cortisol issue based on recent testing. I am trying some different things like lemon balm, cbd oil, magnesium and most recently inositol and a cortisol balancing OTC called Cortisol Calm. I feel like if I can just get my nervous system calm my digestive stuff will go away. I am definitely a TMS candidate with all the personality traits. I get extremely depressed if I don't feel well and I cry and cry which is very cathartic but this just keeps on! I'm completely out of tears...well maybe not.

My story is longer but this has already gotten long without all those details so I won't go into all of it here. In a nutshell, l have been through extreme fear, health anxiety, fear of food, and losing a lot of weight. I'm pretty much over that and just went back to eating most anything I want. But I still wonder if I have an allergy to something I'm eating. Aaarrgh! Anyway, I am steadfast in my belief that it's all TMS but I'm on such a roller coaster with it. I have a few days in a row feeling great and grateful and active and then bam! And I can't tie a damn thing to the symptoms, meaning I can't recall any stressful event that brought it on.

I don't Google anymore but I do keep experimenting with natural supplements and if they don't work right away I move on to another one. I'm driving myself crazy I know but feel powerless over my mind and its obsessing. This then makes me very angry because I have the knowledge I need from all the books and this forum that it's TMS and yet can't seem to get to the bottom of it. I don't know if this rambling will be of help to anybody or not because I'm not providing a solution. I have improved in general, however, so I will add that ray of hope. If nothing else it has helped me regurgitate thoughts about it. I certainly relate to what you all are saying! I am trying to be patient!

Well you’re certainly not alone... and anxiety disorders are going to spike our cortisol and create imbalance in our hormones. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this but I do believe we can improve. I have.... albeit up and down. At times the mornings can return to those difficult places. But most days it’s a full roar that I don’t pay much attention to as I get on with my day.

Have you looked into anxietycentre.com ?
It’s cheap to join (few bucks a month) and they offer some great insight into these conditions. It sounds to me like you know where you are and what the body is doing, put in your post there was one thing I never heard you talk about and that was the why?

something is keeping us like this. In a state of perpetual fight or flight. As far as feeling down or depressed, well I think that would come naturally and occasionally I get those days as well. For me it’s sort of a hodgepodge of emotions and symptoms that can come and go but it always feels like a dysfunctional nervous system. And I believe for me that’s because I went through a period of stress for many years and when my system broke down, it had a very hard time turning off the alarms.

have you incorporated anything into your day to try to settle the nervous system? Supplements are OK but they are unlikely to solve the kind of issues we are experiencing. I think it Hass to be a combination of mindset work and a commitment to physically helping the body get out of fight or flight. That means proper rest, multiple relaxation or meditation periods per day. Or tapping or whatever works for you. I take at least one small nap per day just to try to calm the mind. But at the same time, I’m a type a person and like to be on the go so slowing down for these things it’s hard for me and sometimes I skip it, and so I think my body has a hard time completely settling down.

Acceptance is key of course. It’s how we begin to turn off these alarms. But that takes work too. Some days I can flow with it all... some I’m afraid and struggle containing. So, the work goes on.

Consider what may be underneath all of this too. I can’t always identify that myself. But some people can get to that info easier than others.

Let us know how you’re doing.

 

[TrustIt]

Well you’re certainly not alone... and anxiety disorders are going to spike our cortisol and create imbalance in our hormones. I’m sorry to hear you’re going through this but I do believe we can improve. I have.... albeit up and down. At times the mornings can return to those difficult places. But most days it’s a full roar that I don’t pay much attention to as I get on with my day.

Have you looked into anxietycentre.com ?
It’s cheap to join (few bucks a month) and they offer some great insight into these conditions. It sounds to me like you know where you are and what the body is doing, put in your post there was one thing I never heard you talk about and that was the why?

something is keeping us like this. In a state of perpetual fight or flight. As far as feeling down or depressed, well I think that would come naturally and occasionally I get those days as well. For me it’s sort of a hodgepodge of emotions and symptoms that can come and go but it always feels like a dysfunctional nervous system. And I believe for me that’s because I went through a period of stress for many years and when my system broke down, it had a very hard time turning off the alarms.

have you incorporated anything into your day to try to settle the nervous system? Supplements are OK but they are unlikely to solve the kind of issues we are experiencing. I think it Hass to be a combination of mindset work and a commitment to physically helping the body get out of fight or flight. That means proper rest, multiple relaxation or meditation periods per day. Or tapping or whatever works for you. I take at least one small nap per day just to try to calm the mind. But at the same time, I’m a type a person and like to be on the go so slowing down for these things it’s hard for me and sometimes I skip it, and so I think my body has a hard time completely settling down.

Acceptance is key of course. It’s how we begin to turn off these alarms. But that takes work too. Some days I can flow with it all... some I’m afraid and struggle containing. So, the work goes on.

Consider what may be underneath all of this too. I can’t always identify that myself. But some people can get to that info easier than others.

Let us know how you’re doing.

Thank you, BinLA. Believe me I have tried to get to the why. This feels like a dysfunctional nervous system issue for me as well. I also went through a lot of stress, and a long period at that. That all turned into health anxiety. Then when all of this mess on the planet cranked up in the last year, the dial was turned up for everyone. I've had to remove myself from all the media. I haven't been completely successful there but I'm working on the last bit of that obsession by putting in a lot of rest and multiple meditation periods, like you mentioned. This does indeed help a lot. Every morning I get up and it takes me hours to feel like I can function. I feel strange body sensations I can't describe. Not pain really but like all my organs are repositioning themselves and it makes me feel weak and off balance. I go easily into self-pity mode and I cry and cry and cry. This is helpful since I've never been a crier in my whole life. I try to distract myself but with all the restrictions in the world right now it's hard to find something. And a lack of interest in anything that I can actually participate in, even in my own home, compounds everything. It's a relentless, disempowering, repetitious loop. Acceptance? Oh yes I know. Working on it. Thank you for your kind and encouraging reply.
PS and in response to a statement you made in an earlier post on this thread which was:
"In fact the difference between 10 PM at night and 6 AM in the morning for me can be so stark it’s hard to believe it’s even possible."
Is EXACTLY the same for me!

 

[TrustIt]

I have the same issue due to my cortisol and adrenaline levels running high (my doctor ordered testing), which is definitely a product of anxiety. Meditation, TMS work, natural supplements like 5-HTP and phosphatidylserine, eating well (but still enjoying some indulgences), physical activity that isn’t too stimulating, and breathing exercises are helping me tremendously.

Stop turning to Dr. Google - horror stories only breed bad results. You’re going to be fine, and plenty of people have recovered.

Dorado... can you share with me when you take the phosphatidylserine. This was recommended to me as well but I had two different directions for it. One told me to take it in the morning and one said to take it at night. Any advice?