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Doing things differently

Discussion in 'Success Stories Subforum' started by nowtimecoach, Apr 17, 2014.

  1. nowtimecoach

    nowtimecoach Well known member

    I enjoyed several days without any pain, twinges or reminders that I have TMS. It Was GLORIOUS!!!!:happy::happy::happy:!!! I managed to get through a situation that required some stressful thinking about finances. Resolved it without bringing up TMS. The real test I thought would be to manage pulling off a party for 30 people this saturday without my back seizing up. I kept (and keep) reminding myself that it doesn't have to be perfect. It doesn't have to be the END ALL BE ALL party. I could see myself running into those thoughts and running myself ragged with trying to attain that. I patted myself on the back every time I caught the thinking and changed it. I could feel the changed attitude and belief resonating in my body.
    Then as life does, I got thrown a curveball when my computer died with everything on it. I kind of live my life through these damned little boxes so the stress level went through the roof. I bought a new one. Figured I'll deal with the debt later. Fortunately had a back up service so yesterday was spent trying to restore and get back all my files. I don't need to go into all the details but the TMS came roaring back. What was different is that I kept reminding myself that it doesn't mean its going to stay forever - that I had lots and lots of anger and stress and pressure built up. I realized today that I went running yesterday but it was to relieve the pressure of the TMS (which was actually creating MORE pressure) when what I needed was a calming and relaxed walk. I could see more clearly the stress and pressure I was creating bangheada which helped me stay in "right mind." Instead of focusing on the TMS pain, I kept moving toward soothing the part of me that was freaking out and making things worse.
    We'll see what the next couple of days bring to me. But for now, I am grateful that I had a backup service to restore all my work... that I have a birthday tomorrow and a big party to celebrate friendships and an awesome life. If TMS comes around, I'll put my arms around it, let it know I don't really need its services now but if it stays like an unwelcome guest, I'll just keep focusing on the good life I have and the gratitude I have for this forum!:joyful:
    Ellen and yb44 like this.
  2. yb44

    yb44 Beloved Grand Eagle

    It just goes to show, nowtimecoach (what does this mean?), that we don't have to go with a vengeance. This just exacerbates the pain. I was digging in the garden this week trying to get my vegetable patch ready for planting. This digging business has been a major trigger and one that I have avoided whenever I can due to fear of symptoms returning. Previously I used the digging as a means to vent my anger at various people, as if I were digging their graves! As you say it just brought on the pain. This time, however, I paced myself. I set out to do a small section and as I turned over the earth I did so mindfully, not thinking about some past event that pressed my buttons or a person that p****d me off. Result: small gain but no pain. I am actually looking forward to making further headway with my digging this long weekend
    Ollin and nowtimecoach like this.
  3. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    nowtimecoach likes this.
  4. nowtimecoach

    nowtimecoach Well known member

    Thanks yb44. I liked your reminder to break things down... progress....
    Walt - that is a great quote. I had a huge flareup yesterday and I had to keep working on this thought that I can control the TMS. I was so disappointed to have pain after so many days of normalcy and freedom!! I kept thinking "What am I doing wrong?!!!" I'm in better spirits today - the tms is here but I also understand that I have a volcano pressure valve and I've let too many things get to me. It may have been a little over the top to have a party for 30 people and not expect some kind of tension. I"m just going to try and enjoy myself the best I can.
  5. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Glad you liked the quote from Phyllis Diller.

    I hope you enjoy the party coming up. Maybe try to spend most of the time with someone there that you really like.

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