Does anyone else get in the way of their own fun because of tms and negative thought processes? Has anyone have any tips to overcome. I'm starting to think having more fun could really help my healing I'll give some examples, but the theme seems to be two ideas.. 1) the instinctual (but likely wrong) thought that I shouldn't do anything fun except try to heal or "else" things will get worse and take much longer. That time should be spent on trying to feel better 2) judging me and the activity. Thinking I should be doing something else or that the content isn't good enough or im a loser for engaging in certain things Examples.... Wife wanted to watch a movie. Whole time I think "is there something better I should be doing? Is there a better movie? Am I wasting my time?" Reading a new book " this is the authors first book. How do I know it's any good? What if it is good? There aren't any others to read. Either way it'll be a waste of time" Father in law asks if I'll follow the football team this year " what's the point? It's going to be weird because of covid. I have no control over the outcome and it doesn't matter anyway" Want to listen to a podcast about UFOs (i don't believe in them but did as a kid and find it oddly entertaining and relaxing) "you are a grown man. You can't listen to that stuff. Especially when you have pain to deal with" Casual breakfast with family " is it too quite? Should I talk more? Should I be silly for the kids? Should I have a serious talk with my wife . Is it ok to just be quite and enjoy the food? The food isn't that great. I wish I didn't have to waste time eating" Often times I end up not doing the activity and I stead spend time "healing" like it's a fun past time. Im aware how ridicoulous the words are when I write them down.. but those are the thoughts I'm wondering if I should spend time trying to have better thoughts around these subjects. Is it possible it's this incredible negative thinking and focus fear on the pain that's keeping it around and NOT emotions (as I think I've exhausted that route)?