Day 4 Doctors suck, personality traits, depression

I wish all doctors understood TMS. I really hate going to the doctor because they tell me things like I should not be so active at my age. It is hard on my body. So I avoid going to them, but it leaves me with a big problem. When I feel a pain from an activity, I have no person to turn to who can examine me. I'm left with self examination which sucks because I have doubts about whether it's real injury or just TMS. I feel like it takes forever to figure out it's TMS then when the pain subsides something else comes up to take its place.

Changing subjects, I realize I've got personality traits that are strong in the Stoic, Low Self Esteem, and Dependent areas. I hardly ever show my emotions and I do tend to sell myself short among my peers, and I also prefer others to take the lead. I think I don't like the idea of being judged. I don't think I ever liked having any attention on me at all. When I was a kid in school, I'd get physically ill when having to speak in front of the class. Not just when a kid either. I remember once in college, I had to take a speech class and I almost couldnt speak when my turn came to give a speech. I've improved somewhat now, but still recall those feelings well enough.

Regarding depression, the recent suicide by Robin Williams puts it in the spot light. I sometimes wonder if I have depression. I don't seriously consider killing myself, but I can understand why someone would. I do feel those feelings of hopelessness, inadequacy, worthless, failure, but perhaps not in the same way or as strongly. I've told my wife that I thought I was depressed and she says to quit thinking like that and that I'm just feeling "blue". I'd like to believe her.

 

Hi, Cog. I think your wonderful wife is right. You're not depressed, you're just having the temporary "blues."
Hey, hundreds and more songs have been written about the blues. It's as common as the cold.

But if you tell yourself you're depressed, your mind will believe it.

A good friend said he interviewed Robin Williams three times that thought he was a psycho.
A big name comedian also said everyone in Hollywood knew that.

So he had more than depression causing his suicide. He had lifelong TMS but didn't know it.

And lots of people are nervous about speaking in public. Many great actors and singers, too.
Barbara Streisand keeps a snack bar in her limo enroute to her singing gigs, to eat and relax.
Laurence Olivier said he wet in his pants before some stage performances.

As for doctors, most of them seem to be in it today for the money .
They get a lot of it from pharmaceutical companies that pay them to push pills that
often do more harm than good.

Think happy. Do happy things. Tell your wife you love and appreciate her.

 

Good points Walt. I'll stop thinking about being depressed or possibly having it. I'm working the happy thoughts. Thanks.