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Day 27 DISGUST

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by RozieHolland, Feb 9, 2017.

  1. RozieHolland

    RozieHolland Peer Supporter

    I saw this week a video of Joshua Boom about quantum healing.
    While watching this video I got palpitations, headache collywobbles. and nausea.
    I ask myself what was happening, but I didn't find an answer.
    I stopped watching this video and all the symptoms went away. I was directly normal again.

    This reminds me of something that happened about 10 years ago.
    One night I was alone at home I became very ill.
    About 20.00 hours I got palpitations and became very afraid of it.
    I was afraid of going down. I sat down and try to relax.
    Then my belly started to rumble and I also had the feeling to throw up.
    After a while I crawled to the toilet and it all game out.
    While I was puking I did it in my pants.
    I had cleaned myself and then it started again. I felt so dirty.
    I was so afraid, afraid of going to die all alone.
    But on the other side I was glad to be alone, because I look like hell.
    I sweated like a pig, was deathly pale and full of shit.
    This took about 4 hours, then I felt release and after cleaning myself I went to bed.
    When my boyfriend came home I told him what was happened.
    I did not told him the reason, because I was very ashamed.

    The reason:
    About 20 years ago I had a very violent relation which lasted four weeks.
    It was the greatest relation I ever had.
    After 4 weeks he decided to go back to his wife to completed his marriage. (he is still completing his mariage)
    I totaly collapsed, suffered a severe depression. From everything to nothing.
    He sometimes came by to see how I was doing and then we had sex.

    In the meantime I had a new friend and I don't wanted sex anymore with my ex.
    But he still keeps coming.
    So, 10 years ago my ex came by and we kissed. I disgusted him.
    This was in the afternoon, that evening I became ill.
    I felt very guilty to my boyfriend.

    I have the feeling that the symptoms I had that night originate of DISGUST.
    I was so disgusted by the situation, by my ex that I threw everything out.

    Was the video of Joshua Bloom a trigger?

    The more I write of read or watch videos, the more I can release.

    With love, Rozie.
     
    plum likes this.
  2. Ellen

    Ellen Beloved Grand Eagle

    Sometimes we need to get to an extreme emotion like disgust in order to spur action. Congratulations on having the courage to change your life.

    I now have a new favorite word: "collywobbles" :)
     
    RozieHolland and plum like this.
  3. RozieHolland

    RozieHolland Peer Supporter

    Thanks Ellen.

    The word "collywobbles" comes from Google Translate. Rumble in de belly? Is that better?
     
    Ellen likes this.
  4. plum

    plum Beloved Grand Eagle


    Rozie,

    I find your candour totally refreshing. Thanks for sharing this very powerful experience.

    Plum x
     
    RozieHolland likes this.
  5. RozieHolland

    RozieHolland Peer Supporter

    WOW THANK YOU VERY MUCH PLUM
     

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