Day One...

I was thankful to find this forum this weekend. I've had years of back problems that began nearly 20 years while working as a TV photojournalist carrying heavy equipment around all of the time. The pain subsided after leaving the industry only to return again on and off over the years. Just over 2 years ago the pain returned to my lower back with a fury. I saw a chiropractor to no avail, went to the orthopedic surgeon and finally received steroid injections which worked for 5 months. Then this past November the pain began to creep back a little higher in my back and radiating in different locations. Soon after i began to experience pain in my wrist which I was sure was carpal tunnel since I work on a laptop all day. The pain in my wrist soon travelled up my arm and then into my shoulder. After an EMG, they said I didn't have nerve damage and no signs of carpal tunnel. I was certain i was losing it. How could the pain move?

Then last week, i had a follow up appointment with my surgeon. He said there is no structural problem in my back. I had feelings I could be internalizing my stress (which I've always been prone to do.) I explained to him my thought process and he advised that could be possible. By this time I had already ordered two of Sarno's books because I had a feeling my bone scan results would come up with no answer. Boy was I right. This weekend, after reading one of the books, I woke up with no pain. None. I was afraid to move out of my bed in fear the pain would shoot back. It did on and off throughout the day, but now I'm not really feeling any shoulder pain. What was once stabbing pain in my should blade is virtually gone.

So how did this happen? I think it's because I came to the realization that it was due to stress. I went for a swim this weekend and thought about some specific things I've been stressed about. When one thought came to mind that's been causing me anxiety I felt only what I can call a physical wave rush through my body removing the pain even further. I'm so happy right now.

I honestly never had doubts about the internalization of my stress. When I was in college I experience something similar. I had hives for a year starting my senior year well into my first year at my first "career" job. I had gone to multiple doctors to resolve my itchy hives on my torso. No one could fix it. Then one day I was doing an interview with our resident doctor at the TV station and I brought up my issue. She simply said " did you ever think it was stress induced?" The next day the hives were gone. So the TMS self diagnosis makes perfect sense to me since Ive been dealing with it for years without recognizing it as such.

I've also suffered from TMJ since college as well. This weekend I noticed with the new realization that I could calm this beast as well. I'm happy to say that I'm already experienced a "relaxed" jaw. It feels kind of tired though with residual feelings considering its been contracted for over 20 years.

I'm excited to begin this journey. I'm already seeing and feeling a difference. I just hope I can learn to keep the beast at bay. I'm all in because I'm already seeing the difference. I finally have hope to live pain free. I wish I could give Dr. Sarno a hug for being bold and seeing what this really is.

 

Hi, Katygo. You have come to the right place to heal. It's great that you are reading Dr. Sarno's books. You also could watch the free videos on TMS on Youtube. Do the journaling to discover repressed emotions causing your pain. And refer each day to Dr. Sarno's 12 Daily Reminders. I like this longer version:

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   Herbie’s Extended Version of Dr. Sarno’s 12 DAILY REMINDERS
   1. The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but it is caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears, and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does cause real pain too.
   2. The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you get in pain or in anxiety then the blood is restricted from going to a place such as the lower back. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain. Remember, where there is no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, the pain stays because of fear and focus to physical organic symptoms and repressions.

1. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS, so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from TMS healing knowledge causing damage to anyone. TMS knowledge only helps.

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1. The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER. This means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. TMSers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits,traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks it is helping you.

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1. TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you won't have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed because you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.

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1. Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear then I feed the pain. If I fear It is impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.

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1. Therefore, physical activity is harmless. If I want to work against the pain, I could, but it is better to lose some of the pain.

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1. I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my body's ability to heal now. I can move how I want. I will not fear moving with a bent back anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.

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1. The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how it is hidden -- it's illusion; it's fear.

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10. I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face everyone of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present, in flow.

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   11. I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.

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12. I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling. The science behind mind- body/TMS healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of TMS. TMS will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off psychical symptoms and on emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore, ` thus making the tms of no effect. This will in return, give you the cure.