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Day 8 - treatment so far

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by walllc643, Oct 30, 2014.

  1. walllc643

    walllc643 New Member

    I have been working diligently over the past week with three basic goals in mind:
    1. Learn to accept that my pain is psychosomatic
    2. Learn to be kinder toward myself
    3. Learn to identify and then expose negative thought patterns
    Each of these objectives provides its own unique challenges, but my greatest struggle is with numero uno. It takes a leap of faith to accept that my pain is psychologically rooted, and I've always been more prone to doubt rather than faith. Persistent doubt even in the face of overwhelming evidence has been a trademark of my personality since I was a very small child.

    The fact is nobody can PROVE beyond a shadow of a doubt that my pain is psychosomatic. Theoretically there COULD be some totally bizarre disease process or structural abnormality causing my pain. The logical side of my brain knows how laughably unlikely that is, but my fear-driven emotional self clings to this possibility nonetheless.

    As I continue on in my treatment, I expect the grip of doubt to slowly loosen. I will overcome it through sheer persistence and putting in the work.
     
  2. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Your three goals are great. They'll get you to believe 100 percent that your symptoms are TMS and you'll heal.
    So will the SEP.
     
  3. UkAdR

    UkAdR Peer Supporter

    Walt, can I ask please...

    You always say that you journalled and found that it opened up that you needed to journal about your childhood. I have been journalling about everything I can possibly think of at the moment and I still haven't come close to healing.

    Did you recognise that this was what you needed to journal about early on or did it come up through journalling about other things?

    Cheers,

    Adam
     
  4. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    I had done such a good job of repressing my childhood emotions (stemming from my parents divorcing when
    I was 7, and their constant financial problems, that I didn't even think they had caused me any anger, but they sure did.
    Journaling uncovered that.

    I just journaled about my boyhood and that led me to better understand my anger. That led me to understanding my parents
    better and that led to forgiving and then that led to healing the back pain.
     
  5. UkAdR

    UkAdR Peer Supporter

    You always make it sound so simple Walt...
     
  6. Boston Redsox

    Boston Redsox Well Known Member

    He sure does Uk
     

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