Day 8. Hello, everyone.My name is Lina

Hello there.Finally i found the courage to join all of you. First I would like to share a part of my story with you. Pain in my lower back started day to day 10 months ago.It went down to right leg after few months as well. I wasn't scared so much ,cause at that time ( after couple months) I had Dr. Sarno book "Healing back pain" in my hands . ( Actually first what I saw was Forest's video on you tube about his path to recovery( thanks to You,Forest Rest came after that)"Healing back pain"and several others and of course this website ( where I am now) kept me"alive" and gave me huge hope. It was quiet a big struggle, I was "obsessed" and happy at the same time about learning of TMS, with many ups and downs,and with a lot of reading and gaps between( but never lost faith I in that) my pain 95proc. was gone. That happened after about eight months from the beginning of pain). I couldn't believe , cause I didn't monitor the pain ( I think that was the main key) and didn't think much about anymore. One day I realised that it was gone. Of course I was so happy, I thought I overcome it. But after one and half month pain came back in lower back and the same right leg.It was quite intensive and I came back here again,reading about TMS, forums. My pain became more severe and I had to take off from work.Now it is fourth week,I live with the pain again and I decided to start this program,cause I think I have to do much more than to read ( what I did before).First days were really bad ,was desperate and wanted the pain to go away.I am still on tablets ( painkillers),but less,cause pain is not so intensive.I still need to reread articles about fear( thanks to this program) and stop controlling my pain.It is not easy,cause I am a bit worrier and stressful person with many personality traits( due to my past). Why did this pain came back?I think I have to go much deeper with my past and emotions. Usually I was running away from them or avoid them.I made commitment to myself to listen to my emotions,to work with them , also to do journalling ( it is not easy to come back to past, but really worthy) After writing I try to sit/lay calm or meditate and feel and accept them. And after I feel much better. I think it is important to listen to our emotions.They want to tell us much more (the same pain).
I hope you understood my story (english is not my first language) I am happy to be here,I know I am not one of them (believer in TMS)( I feel sometimes lonely ,cause there are no people around, where I live, who would believe in mind body medicine or TMS) I wish everybody and to myself to get well and live without pain and find answers from it.I definitely believe everything has a reason and I know all of us have good and bad days( including pain),and there many unanswered questions,which I hope many of them I will find here, together with you.
I am a fan of Teal Swan.I would like to share her video about feelings.Maybe it will be helpful to someone. See you later.Lina
https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=teal+swan+feelings

 

Hello, Lina. It's very nice to meet you here and I am so glad you joined our TMS community with lots of caring people.

You didn't describe your life, especially your childhood, but it does look like you are going to work on that in the SEP. Journaling is a great way to discover the hidden or repressed emotions causing pain. Thanks for sharing the Teal Swan video. I find a lot of excellent videos on YouTube related to TMS, MindBody healing, relaxation, mindful meditation, deep breathing... all important in TMS healing.

Some people are very lucky that they heal from TMS pain just from reading Dr. Sarno. It takes most of us to do more work, as it did me. Read the success stories in that subforum of this web site for great examples of TMH healing.

And here is Kevin's story on how he became 95 percent healed from taking the SEP. He posted a few days later that he was 100 percent healed.

Kevin healed 95 % from SEP

Welcome to the SEP and to the path of recovery. I am on my final two days of the program and I can say with complete confidence that I am a changed man. I started after 6 months of nasty low-back/butt/leg pain, could hardly walk, stand, etc. was in physical therapy, chiropractor, acupuncture, pain medications, etc.. the usual. My MRI showed 3 disk bulges/herniations touching nerves, so that is what I believe it to be....that is until I read Dr. Sarno and found this site.

I encourage you to really get involved, follow the instructions, do the journaling, take time to read all the suggested readings, and watch the videos. I'd say I'm 95% cured. There is still some very light lingering "annoyance", but I still have some work to do. I've been walking miles with hardly any pain these last few weeks. But even more, if the pain comes on now, it just doesn't bother me like it used to, I sorta just see it, acknowledge it, and go about my business. It took working the program to get to that point, but 6 weeks compared to 6 months is nothing! I made more progress in the first week than I did from two months of PT!!! It's going to challenge you and your "beliefs" in medicine, but you have nothing to lose. We generally wind up here when all else fails.

If you put the work in, you will get better. Have you read Dr. Sarno yet? I assume you have since you're here, but in case you haven't, definitely readHealing Back Pain. Again, it will challenge everything you've believed about your pain, and backs in general. You'll be encouraged to resume life as normal, i.e. stop ALL "therapies" (PT, chiro, etc.), stop taking medications, and most importantly, stop thinking STRUCTURAL problems are the cause of your pain and shift to psychological as the reason.....again, this can be difficult and takes some time to sink in, so be patient and kind to yourself.

It was a process for me. A few of the bigger moves in my case were: I ripped up and threw out my MRI test results (I found myself obsessively reading over them and comparing them to other results I could find on the web and even here on the TMSwiki site...); I got back to the gym and stopped using a weight belt; and I even cancelled an appointment I had made with aTMS doctorbecause it was more than a month away and it was hindering my recovery (that is, my 100% belief in TMS was lagging because I had this pending appointment, but as soon as I cancelled it, my recovery sped up significantly). Everyone's journey is unique to their situation, but I've found that really committing to the program and brining what I learn from it into my daily life has had profound results. Also, sharing along the way here in these forums has been extremely helpful - there's something about knowing that you're not alone in your TMS recovery that really helps. I encourage you to look through my past posts for some insight into my experience with SEP. Like I said, I'm just now finishing, tomorrow is my final day, and I feel like a changed person. It's amazing. And I feel as though it is something that one carries on with, not just like a one time 6 week thing and that's that...it has helped me to get to know myself and taught me tools to "deal" with my emotions. Learning and accepting TMS is a life changer for sure.

 

Thanks a lot for your reply, Walt ,and for inspiring Kevin's story. I like to read success stories very much,especially when i feel bad or in more pain.They give me lots of confidence and hopes.In a future I will tell you more about my childhood and past.I will come back soon here. Take care

 

Hi Lina,
How nice to read your commitment to yourself, and your devoted practice. This sounds simple, but I know it takes a lot of courage to look inside. Good luck to you!
Andy B.