Day 4

[giulietta90]

Just answering my qeustion for Day 4!

The most disheartening thing that was told to me by a physician about my symptoms was for that everything they found wasn't bad enough to justify the amout of discomfort and the weakness in my left arm and hand...


Also not disheartening but enlightening: a year ago my physiotherapist told me that I could still recover and go back playing music professionally, as long as I put a lot of energy and discipline, and time. And also that in order to succeed I really needed to WANT to play again as badly as I still did when i first had gotten injured, two years earlier.
This idea of imposing even more extreme discipline and seriousness and control upon myself (on top of everything else I had imposed on myself so far!!!) was unbearable and didn't feel right. Also at that point my selfworth, selflove, and justification for being alive wasn't anymore based how my musical career was going...
thak goodness. I ended up quitting music (after 17 years of studying and performing), with no regrets.

 

[Andy Bayliss]

Hi giulietta90,

I want to congratulate you and encourage you on your work with the SEP. Reading your posts I see your honesty, hopefulness, and courage. I hope you're patient with yourself, patient with the progress. Sometimes just feeling the joy of life, in its very simplest things, basic pleasures, can go a long way to healing...

And I send support for you and your mum.

Andy

 

[giulietta90]

Hi Andy,

thank you for your kind words!
I hope I can keep it that way, some days it definitely is less easy.
)

 

[Andy Bayliss]

Yes, but in the "less easy" we learn to grow our new muscles, and take on more of our --and others' lives, with a little more grace, I think...